


A Glimmer in the Dark

by ADangerousGame



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Smut, Foursome - F/M/M/M, Komaeda Nagito Being Komaeda Nagito, M/M, Multi, Rape/Non-con Elements, Smut, Threesome - F/M/M, m/m - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:28:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 21
Words: 62,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25905097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ADangerousGame/pseuds/ADangerousGame
Summary: "Rin-chan…" His voice sent shivers down my spine, while his eyes became dark with what was akin to… desire. He ran a long, pale finger down my cheek and stopped at my neck, right above my pulse. "Give yourself to me."My eyes widened before a loud sound echoed in the room. The sharp noise of flesh against flesh as his head turned from the impact of my palm smacking his face.
Relationships: Hinata Hajime/Kamukura Izuru/Komaeda Nagito, Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Hinata Hajime/Original Female Character(s), Hinata Hajime/Reader, Kamukura Izuru/Komaeda Nagito, Kamukura Izuru/Original Female Character(s), Kamukura Izuru/Reader, Komaeda Nagito/Original Character(s), Komaeda Nagito/Original Female Character(s), Komaeda Nagito/Reader
Comments: 129
Kudos: 187





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Komaeda Nagito is such a fascinating character... I couldn't help but write about him. I really like my psychopaths. Is he actually a psychopath when he's so self-deprecating? Maybe not...

I groaned when I opened my eyes to see the sun blaring down at me. Beneath my fingers and stuck underneath my nails was sand. So much sand…

Another groan left my lips at t he thought of having to get it out of all the places it shouldn’t be. Why was I on a beach? I would never willingly go on one. I hated beaches. Ugh…

I turned my head to the side and saw… more sand. It was as if I was stuck in purgatory. How could one place have so much sand?

“Hey! Hey!”

With a stressed out sigh, I sat up and saw a pale face beam back at me. “Hey, how are you?”

I rubbed my eyes. “Awful. This is awful. Who are you and where am I?” Who was this strange man? Was he the one who kidnapped me here or had we been washed ashore together? Judging from the sand on him, it was most likely the latter.

“Oh… that’s too bad.” His face fell before lighting up again. “I hope you feel better soon. I’m Komaeda Nagito – the Ultimate Lucky student. I know it’s a stupid talent,” he sighed. “But never mind that. What about you?”

“I’m… Saeki Rin,” I replied. Could I really tell him what my ultimate was? It was so ridiculous, especially considering who _he_ was and he already thought his talent was terrible.

He continued to wait for me to continue with that goofy expression on his face, until I quickly mumbled the rest of my answer. He tilted his head in confusion. “I’m sorry. I didn’t hear that. Do you mind repeating? It can’t be as bad as mine, so please, don’t be shy.”

Still, I hesitated. He didn’t – couldn’t possibly – understand how embarrassing this was. The fact that I was still alive to contemplate all this was extremely surprisingly in and of itself.

“Rin-chan?” He blinked at me with wide, innocent eyes.

“I… I…” With a deep breath, I finally blurted out my shameful secret. “I’m the Ultimate Unlucky Student!”

His jaw fell and I quickly stood up to leave, but he was quicker. His hand grabbed my upper arm. “Wait! Don’t go! I’m just… surprised. I never thought I’d meet someone with such a… such a… hopeful talent!”

What stupidity was coming out of his mouth, now? Did he really think such a blatant lie would fool me?

When I turned to snap at him, I noticed the sparkles in his eyes and realised that perhaps he was being genuine after all, but I couldn’t seem to wrap my head around how that could be. “Why are you…?”

“I’m so envious! For someone to be unlucky… The despair… The _hope_ that comes after conquering that despair!” he gushed, leaning towards me with swirling green eyes. “To wake up every day just to know that you had beat another day of despair!”

Gritting my teeth, I slapped him across the face. “Don’t even joke about it! Do you even know how much I had to go through? All the hardships… The trauma… The loss… _Never talk light about it!_

His hand fell and I ran away from him. The tears streamed down my face as all the memories hit me all at once. This was why I applied to Hope’s Peak Academy, to get away from my past, but just days after, I end up on this fucking beach! That was just my luck, wasn’t it?

Suddenly, there was a loud crack and the sound of rustling. I looked up to see a palm tree tumbling down in my direction.

I let out a terrified scream, but someone pulled me back and I fell against a warm body.

With my heart pounding in my chest and blood rushing to my head, I nearly missed what they were saying.

“Lucky that I got to you in time,” he laughed softly before sobering up. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, but… being the Ultimate Lucky student, all I am is a stepping stone for all the other hopefuls with talents much more impressive than mine. Yours is a prime example. I just… I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry, Rin-chan. Forgive me?”

How could I not with the way he was looking at me? Not only that, he _did_ just save my life. And so, I nodded and hoped that I wasn’t going to regret my decision.

He smiled. “Thank you! Now, why don’t you stay close to me? Maybe then, we’ll be able to balance each other out!”

That actually didn’t seem like such a bad idea, but he was so strange. Would my sanity survive this?

“I’ll take good care of you, Rin-chan.” His voice had a huskier undertone and there was darkness in his eyes that sent shivers down my spine, but as quickly as it appeared, it was gone and he was back to all smiles.

We made our way around the beach and found another body in the sane. He was brunet in a white dress shirt and green tie – a typical school outfit. 

What was going on? Why were we all stranded here on a random island? How could I have no memories of what happened between being accepted to the academy and now? The last thing I remembered was receiving my acceptance letter and I left my foster home. I thought I had put the worst behind me, but now, the future didn’t seem so hopeful.

The male turned out to be Hinata Hajime and his amnesia was even worse than mine. He couldn’t even recall what his talent was.

As Komaeda decided to stay with Hinata, I explored the rest of the island. A part of me was hoping he’d come with me for a little while longer as my good luck charm, but he was still only a stranger and I couldn’t possible put that much hope in him. Besides, I was the one who walked away. I wasn’t particularly good with crowds and the feeling that I was imposing all the time prevented me from mingling.

“Oi! You!”

I looked over to the right to see a pink-haired guy stomp over to me. “Hey, what the Hell is going on here?!” he shouted at me as if I was the reason he was stranded. I went into the safe space in my mind whenever someone yelled at me.

I was pretty used to being blamed for things. It came with my unorthodox “talent.” I didn’t really know how I ended up being accepted to the academy. Maybe they took pity on me – for someone to actually register themselves as the Ultimate Unlucky Student.

_If only you weren’t so pathetic, then maybe no one would have to yell at you._

I pushed that voice away. Sometimes, they still leaked through when I wasn’t at my best, but most of the time, I had it under control.

“Are you listening to me?!” he yelled some more.

“No, I wasn’t,” I truthfully confessed. ”If I told you my name, would you tell me yours?”

He huffed, crossing his arms in annoyance, but a soft blush painted his face as he looked away. “Yeah…”

“I’m Saeki Rin. I came here probably the same way you did, but I can’t remember how,” I told him. “I really only want to go to the school I applied to.”

“Oh, you mean Hope’s Peak Academy?” he asked, a surprised look on his face.

I nodded.

“I guess you’re a student, too, then?” He appeared sheepish as he rubbed the back of his head. “Sorry for uh… yelling at you. I was uh… just confused. I’m Souda Kazuichi, but the way. The Ultimate Mechanic!”

I was glad that he was distracted by a beautiful blonde before he could ask about my _talent_. Was my curse finally alleviating?

“Look at _her_.” Souda was practically salivating. “Come on, introduce me to her, so it’s not awkward!”

He dragged me over to the female who gave a startled cry when we appeared before her. “State your names! Are you the ones who abducted me?” She put her hands on her hips as she gazed accusingly at us.

Here we go again…

I ended up going through the same terrible routine over and over again, until I finally met everyone. We were all first years about to start Hope’s Peak Academy and none of us knew how we came to be here.

“Hello, everyone!”

I jumped and accidentally stepped on Saionji who let out an angry exclamation before shoving me away. For such a tiny girl, she sure was strong…

“Hey, be careful.” Komaeda righted me with a smile. ‘Here, I’ll stand like this so you won’t bump into anyone else.”

He positioned himself behind me with a hand on my waist.

“Wh – What are you - ?!” I flushed bright red. How dare he?!

“Don’t worry. I won’t be doing anything unless you want me to.” That same dark look filled his eyes as he gazed down at me. “And no one will notice us as long as that pink rabbit is around. She’s cute, isn’t she?”

Yeah, Usami was a cute rabbit, but she only added to the confusion. What alternative universe had I fallen into? Was she an animatronic? She had to be, right? But who was controlling her?

Despite being seemingly kidnapped by this pink rabbit, she seemed friendly enough and didn’t appear to mean us any harm, so I tugged Komaeda away from the scene to escape the sun. “Sorry. I think I’m getting sunburnt there and I’m feeling a little dizzy…”

He quickly sat me down on the wooden patio in front of a cabin before retrieving a glass of water from inside. “Here, this will help. Drink up or you’ll become dehydrated.”

“Where did you even get this from…?” I asked, looking suspiciously at the crystal clear liquid.

He grinned, plopping down beside me. “I’m the Ultimate Lucky Student, remember? I went inside and there’s a large dining hall and kitchen inside.”

I blinked. Seriously? His luck was truly amazing! It was like _magic_. If I asked him to do something or get me something, would he be able to do it or will my unluckiness prevail instead?

If I was the one to go in, I would probably break the floorboard and my legs at the same time!

“Thank you, Komaeda-san.” I gave him a grateful smile and took a sip of the water. It was cool and refreshing. “What do you think will become of us?” I asked, rotating the sparkling glass in my hands.

“Who knows? But whatever happens, we’ll be fine!” He sounded so confident, but why wouldn’t he? He was the Ultimate Lucky Student, which meant that he would be fine no matter what happened. The same couldn’t exactly be said about me…

Seeing my downcast eyes, he went on. “I won’t let anything happen to you, either! Knowing this, it fills me with hope!” His eyes were glowing again with determination. ‘Doesn’t it do the same for you?” His hands were cupping my own and for some reason… 

It did.

I was once again given… _hope_ and I wasn’t about to let it go because for the first time in forever, I wasn’t drowning with despair.

“Hey, wake up! I think something is happening over there!” I heard a soft voice and a gentle nudge rouse me from my peaceful slumber. 

I lifted my head from his shoulder and felt my face flush. When had I even fallen asleep? I seemed to have missed everything regarding Usami or had that just been a dream? It all seemed so surreal.

“Come on.” Komaeda stood up and held out his hand to me.

I accepted it, while brushing my pants off. 

“Nooooo!” came a high pitch wail of the pink rabbit that was being abused by a black and white… teddy bear? “Violence is strictly prohibited on this island. Why are you being so meaaaan?”

The bear cackled and proceeded to change the winged, magical rabbit into something more to his image. She lost all her magic and was left looking like a pink and white rabbit version of this Monokuma. He even renamed her into Monomi.

“Puhuhuhuhuhu…” Monokuma continued to laugh at the chaos he created. He, then, explained that everyone was now participating in a Killing Game where the only way to win was to murder and get away with it after going through a Class Trial. If we weren’t able to them, then we’d all die and allow the murderer to walk free. It was difficult wrapping my mind around it. Did he really expect us to… _kill_ each other? Why would we even do that? “Good luck, everyone!”

We were only high school students. There was no way anyone would resort to killing. 

I ran to the edges of the island and other than water and sand, there were several gates guarded by large robotic beasts – Monobeasts, he called them. They paid no attention to me, so I began to inch forward, hoping that I would be able to sneak past, but the large serpent suddenly snapped its metal jaw at me.

With my heart racing, I managed to stumble away with my head intact, but it had sliced a shallow gash across my right cheek. It didn’t strike again, but I wasn’t going anywhere near it without a plan and a weapon.

I searched a bit more and found a supermarket. It was surprisingly stocked, but nothing particularly useful unless I could take down one of those beasts with a surfboard.

More than likely, I would pull a muscle or trip over and have it fall on me. Instead, I strolled over to the snack aisle and looked at the selection. I couldn’t recognise any of the brands, but chocolate was chocolate, right? Besides, beggars couldn’t be choosers here.

I picked a bar of dark chocolate and opened up the wrapped. I sniffed it first to see if there was anything wrong. It wasn’t rancid. Next, I looked at every side. There wasn’t even a single spot of bloom. Really? That was unusual. Lastly, I took a very small bite. The chocolate was the perfect combination of sweetness and bitterness.

“What is with that weird face?” Saionji sneered. “Are you a pervert?”

I shook my head. “I just really like chocolate.”

She crossed her arms before something caught her eyes. “Whoa! These are my favourite gummies!” She snatched it off the shelf and immediately tore open the packaging and popped a red one into her mouth.

It was strange. She was supposed to be the same age as me, but she looked and behaved years younger. Everyone here was so quirky that I was actually able to easily blend in.

I stepped out with a sigh and closed my eyes as I felt the salty breeze caress me. Maybe I was finally going to get my wish here. Who knows? Komaeda’s luck may actually be able to nullify my curse long enough for me to be set free.

Speaking of, I could see his snowy head peeking in and waving at me.

“Komaeda-san,” I greeted him.

“You suddenly disappeared, so I was worried. I’m happy to be able to find you here.” Of course, he’d find me. His luck seemed to be infallible. His hand was sudden on my cheek, brushing the cut that made me wince. “What happened? You shouldn’t have wandered off. I wasn’t able to protect you…”

His concerned eyes made me feel guilty for acting so selfishly. “I’m sorry. I was upset over what I heard from Monokuma. You’re right, I shouldn’t have wandered off. The Monobeasts are actually pretty scary,” I laughed.

He sighed. “Rin-chan…” 

Taking my hand, he led me over to the first aid aisle with basic supplies and grabbed a few items from the shelves. I felt like a child being guided around and ended up in front of a group of cottages where we were to be staying.

“Do you mind if we go to yours?” he asked. “We can leave the supplies at your place because I have a feeling, you might need it.”

I sniffed, turning my nose at him.

His laughter made me smile. He was strange, but… kind. Despite how we met, I actually felt like I could trust him the most out of everyone here.

“There we go,” he said after cleaning the wound and gently sticking on the adhesive bandage.

He looked around my room, noting how it seemed to be filled with stuffed animals. They lined all the shelves and piled on top of the bed and couch. “Are you five?”

“Huh?”

He burst out laughing. “Rin-chan is cute.”

My face immediately lit up. “S-Stop, Komaeda-san! I didn’t decorate the room! It’s not my fault! Blame Usami!”

“It does seem like something she would like…” he thoughtfully said. “But my room is more to my style, so this must be what the real Rin-chan is like!”

That was true. No matter how much I could deny it, I loved stuffed animals. They were the friends I could trust to never betray me or hurt me. They would never leave me or die. “… S-So what…?”

“As I said, Rin-chan is cute.” 

_ AUTHOR’S NOTE _

New story!! I was hoping to work on something old that I left hanging, but after watching the gameplays for the Danganronpa trilogy, I became obsessed. I became emotionally attached to the second one. Komaeda Nagito is definitely my favourite character, followed by Oma Kokichi. Who is your favourite character in the series?

I’m also not going to follow the plotline exactly. Some things may pop up a little out of order and they’ll be saying slightly different things. 

Her talent is also a little unorthodox, but… I couldn’t seem to let it go, so I hope you’ll still like the story!

Please leave a review if you enjoyed this!


	2. Chapter 2

The next day, Togami had an announcement to make. 

“Listen up!” he shouted from inside the old building that had become our dining hall. “We will be having a party tonight! There will be no dangerous objects allowed and I will personally make sure of that!”

Everyone agreed that out of everyone, he would be the most fitting as our leader. He was very commanding and had a presence to him that we all listened to. 

“As long as I am alive, I will keep you all safe!” he boldly declared. “It is mandatory for everyone to attend! I will not accept any excuses!” 

The words were strangely ominous after hearing about the killing games. It seemed as if something had spooked him and he was taking precautions. Was someone here really going to become a murderer? Just that thought was terrifying.

I returned to my cottage with my mind racing, wondering who it was he was so careful about. All the hope I had while with Komaeda was quickly dissipating and the despair crept in once more.

He had been wrong about me. I wasn’t filled with hope. I was already on the verge of giving up on everything. Hope’s Peak Academy was supposed to be my new beginning, but to end up in this Killing Game…

I closed my eyes. This was all because I felt so helpless all the time. Why couldn’t I be more like Komaeda? His hope was actually contagious.

A knock on my door made me frown. 

I opened the door to see the subject of my thoughts standing there with a smile on his face. “Hey! Did you fall asleep again? Your hair is almost as messy as mine!”

Startled, I ran my hand through my long locks to find that it was indeed sticking up at odd angles. “S-Sorry…”

“Don’t worry about it. I think it’s adorable. Anyway, the party is about to start soon. I didn’t want you to get in trouble,” he told me.

Ah… How much time had passed? I was so lazy here, but it wasn’t as if there was anything for me to do. Just stepping outside the cottage was a risk for more sand in unseemly places.

I tilted my head at him. “You came all the way back here to remind me? I thought you had cleaning duty.”

“Yeah, I did. It was fun, but I’m done now and almost everyone is there waiting.” He took my hand and began to pull me forward. “Come on! Come on!”

“W-Wait!” He didn’t allow me to return to my cottage, so I tried desperately to make myself presentable by running my hand through my hair several times.

Togami’s imposing form stood in front of the old building. His arms were crossed as he scrutinised us.

Komaeda, who stepped forward first, was thoroughly patted down before being ushered in. He waited just beyond the doorway for me.

“Is this… really necessary?” I didn’t want to be frisked.

“Yes. I will do anything to keep everyone safe. Now, don’t move.” His large hands patted me down. He was very professional with it and didn’t linger anywhere. “Alright, go in and don’t cause me any trouble!”

I stumbled over the threshold and looked at the immaculate set up. “Wow! You guys have done an amazing job!”

“Heh… Thanks!” Komaeda scratched the back of his head with a content blush on his face.

I watched everyone happily converse and it actually looked like a normal class activity.

“Say cheese!”

I was grabbed and Komaeda pressed his cheek against mine as a flash blinded me.

“Thanks!” Koizumi grinned before going to her next victim.

What… just happened? I felt oddly violated. Ironic, since the frisking turned out fine.

“Damn Kuzuryu didn’t come…” Togami growled when he stepped inside. “No matter… One should be fine.”

Suddenly, something caught his eyes and he lunged towards the table of skewers.

“Wh – What?!” Hinata exclaimed in shock, jumping out of the way of the enraged male.

“Who allowed these sharp, metal rods to be in here?!” Togami scolded while chomping down on the meat around the skewers. How was he even able to speak with how vigourously he was eating? “I will not let anything of the sort to be in this room!”

Akane, who was also stuffing her face, was the only one not staring at him.

Was this truly the Ultimate Affluent Progeny? Was eating and spotting dangerous objects also his talents?!

Komaeda chuckled. ‘That is rather impressive, isn’t it? His hope is shining brighter than ever! It is absolutely glorious!”

I shot him an uncertain look. That wasn’t how I would personally describe the scene in front of me. I was appalled by this abhorrent display. Pieces of meat and droplets of saliva flew everywhere. I shuddered before looking away to gaze at the cook, Hanamura, who was stuttering back his reasoning.

“Everyone seems to be having fun,” Komaeda laughed.

Really?

He turned towards Hinata who was also looking at everything, wondering if this was all just a terrible dream.

If only…

“Hinata-kun!” He waved the brunet over.

Hinata had a drink in hand and greeted us with a small smile. “Komaeda, Saeki-san.”

I got to know him a little. There was nothing particularly strange about him like everyone else. He was refreshingly ordinary. 

As I was about to reach for a mug at the back table, the lights went out. It was pitch black with absolutely no way to see anything.

What was going on? Why was there suddenly a blackout?

“Hey, what are you doing?” I could hear Togami beside me. The warmth coming from his large form was just within reach and beneath my feet, I could feel a faint tremour.

“Ow!” Komaeda cried. His footfalls stumbled about, landing heavily on the old rug.

“You guys, where are you? Wasn’t the blackout just in the kitchen?” Hanamura fearfully stuttered. He sounded so close, but where was he exactly?

I was a little confused as to where everyone suddenly was. Togami was definitely somewhere beside me. The table was in front of me. Komaeda was to my right just beyond Togami, so where did that place the cook? The voice sounded somewhere where the table should be. Could he actually be right beneath… my feet?

After several confused minutes, the lights went back on and I blinked my eyes to adjust to the sudden brightness. I looked around and didn’t see anything out of place.

“Wow, good job, Souda-chan!” Mioda praised the mechanic who said he was going to find the fuse box.

“it… It wasn’t me!” he confessed. “I couldn’t find my way there in the dark!”

Strange…

Was this part of the Killing Game? If so, what was the purpose of it?

Frowning, I got my mug and filled myself a steaming cup of hot chocolate. Unfortunately, the delectable scent was marred by something less savoury. It was strange – familiar, yet…

I took a startled step back and found that I was leaving a trail of footprints lined with red. I wanted to believe that it was paint, but paint didn’t smell like this.

“Hey, what’s that smell?” Owari asked, her nose twitching in the air as she tried to track the scent.

“It really stinks!” Saionji whined. “I’m losing my appetite!”

I could feel everyone’s eyes on me, burning a hole through my back.

The smell was coming from the table in front of me where… where _he_ had been.

“Th-There’s blood!” Sonia cried, pointing at my footprints.

“What the Hell?!” Souda shouted. “What did you do, Saeki?! I knew you were bad news!”

“I – I…” I shook my head in horror. I hadn’t done anything, but my prints were all over the floor and… and…

Hinata walked past me to lift the table cloth and in an instant, my fear was confirmed. Togami Byakuya, the Affluent Progeny, was dead. His face was pressed against the old floorboard where the carpet couldn’t quite reach. A pool of blood puddle beneath him and sitting in the mess was a knife, coated with a strange green and slightly glowing substance. Still clasped loosely in one hand was what appeared to be night vision goggles.

“Wh-Why?” I whispered. Why had he been killed? Who would kill him and why _now_? Why couldn’t we even enjoy one day together without bloodshed?

I was suddenly lifted off my feet and staring at two angry orbs of Owari. “Why did you kill Togami? What had he ever done to you?!”

_“A body has been discovered! Following a brief period of investigation, we will commence our school trial!”_ The TV on the side showed Monokuma before it flashed back to black.

“I asked you… WHY?!” she screamed.

“I… It wasn’t me.” I tried to get her to let me go, but it was no use. She had an iron grip on me. I could even hear the fabric of my shirt tearing. “I didn’t do it. I would never…” 

_“Rin, tell us again what happened to your brother?” a looming figure demanded. Her dark, angry eyes were fixed on me._

_I played with the hem of my shirt. “H-He fell off the tree! I t-told him not to… But he couldn’t l-listen t-t-to me…”_

_Pain whipped across my face, leaving hot, stinging pain behind. “Didn’t I tell you to stop lying, you ungrateful brat?! I took you into my family with only kindness in my heart and this is how you repay me?!”_

_“Not my fault… I d-didn’t do it…” I cried, holding my face with my hands. It hurt. It really hurt!_

_Why wouldn’t she believe me that he had fallen on his own? It wasn’t my fault that he broke his arm. He should’ve been the one to be more careful! There was no one to blame but himself! It wasn’t fair that she was blaming me for everything! **He** was the older one! **He** should’ve known better!_

_“Come here!” She grabbed my wrist, roughly pulling me forward. “No dinner for you. Don’t even think about coming out of there!”_

_She tossed me into the cupboard beneath the sink. When my head hit the cold pipe, I was momentarily immobilised by the shock and pain._

_Once my vision cleared, I tried to push open the door, but it barely budged. “No! Mama! Mama! Don’t leave me in here! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I won’t let it happen again! Let me out! Let me out!”_

**_“Don’t call me mama. I’m not your mother.”_ **

“Hey, calm down, Owari-san.” Hinata placed his hand on her arm, trying to pacify her. “We don’t have any proof Saeki-san had anything to do with this.”

“Her bloody footprint is all over the place!” Souda exclaimed, pointing at the obvious.

“N-No, I was standing there. I d-didn’t know his body… that he had… I must’ve stepped on the blood b-b-beneath the table…” How did it come to this? How far did my bad luck extend?!

“Guys, we should use this time to investigate. We can’t just blindly blame each other! We’d be playing right into Monokuma’s paws,” Hinata told everyone. Once Owari dropped me on to the floor, he turned to focus on the crime scene.

“Rin-chan, are you alright?” Komaeda dropped to his knees beside me. “I believe you didn’t kill him.” His smile didn’t mean much now when it felt as if I was sinking deeper and deeper into an endless abyss. “How could someone as tiny you kill anyone?” His laughter filled the room, fuelling the nausea that bubbled in my stomach.

Seeing that his attempt of cheering me up failed, his face lost all signs of mirth. “Are you truly that weak to allow despair to win? Have I been wrong about you?”

I gritted my teeth and balled up my fists. “I… I’m not…” He was right. This Killing Game just started. I couldn’t let my past defeat me now. I knew I was innocent and that was all that mattered. The truth had to prevail or we would all die anyway. “I’m okay, Komaeda-san. Thank you and… I’m not _that_ short! Not everyone can be giants like you!”

When he wouldn’t stop teasing me, I huffed and punched him in the arm. “Shut up!”

Chuckling, he ruffled my hair. “What a cute chipmunk face. Don’t worry, I will be your stepping stone to rise higher and higher towards ultimate hope.

I didn’t really understand what he was saying, but I was glad someone was on my side.

“Me and my Four Dark Devas of Destruction shall solve this mystery that is shrouded with malicious intent!” Tanaka declared. A strange, almost evil aura seemed to be _emitting_ from him. Above all, however, his “Dark Devas of Destruction” were four adorable hamsters!

“They sure look tasty, don’t they?”

My eyes went as wide as plates as I turned my head in shock to see Komaeda still grinning. “Just kidding~!”

I hit him, again.

Throughout the investigation period, I was closely watched. There was almost no point in me even approaching the body because they thought I was going to tamper with it. 

My mind drifted off to the slight disturbance during the blackout. What caused it? Was there an earthquake?

I crouched down to the left side of the room to look at the wooden panels. The gaps were much larger than I initially thought. Was this because of rotting or could it be just another trap for something else to happen?

“Did you find a clue?” Hanamura asked, hovering over my crouching form. “If you want me to help, I don’t mind giving you a… hand. Who knows how long anyone has, we should make the most of it – you and I.”

I couldn’t suppress the disgust from my face. “No, thank you.”

He didn’t seem too bothered. Instead, he whipped out his comb and began to run it through his over-gelled hair with a smug smile.

I went back to the gaps, but I didn’t have anything substantial, only half-thought out speculations.

“Komaeda-san, was there an earthquake earlier during the blackout?” I asked.

“Earthquake? No, I didn’t feel anything,” he replied, crouching down beside me to also look at the gaps. “Did you find something interesting all the way here?”

I glared at him. “I can’t really go there when they all think I did it.”

“It’s alright. I already know exactly what happened.”

“What?!” How? He barely even looked over the body! He had spent most of this time with me, so… _what_ …?

“Like I told you before, don’t worry about it and just leave everything to me. I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.” That smile was so genuine. It was difficult not to believe him, but he was still a stranger. I couldn’t possibly put that much faith in him. This could all be part of some wicked plan to… kill me…?

Komaeda didn’t seem like that kind of person, but what did I know? The extent of our friendship-acquaintanceship had only lasted twenty-four hours. 

“Time is up! Everyone head to Monokuma Rock. Class trial is about to begin and this is mandatory for everyone to attend!” Monokuma appeared on the small television screen, once more. “You better hurry!”

Monokuma Rock was a large structure with multiple carvings of the bear. It was like that one famous mountain range with the faces, but strangely ominous for such a cute design.

We headed up on the elevator, looking at each other with accusing eyes. I knew for a fact that I didn’t kill Togami, but I didn’t know anyone else and if I was being truthful to myself, Komaeda sounded a little suspicious during the blackout. He was close enough and so was Hanamura.

Once the door opened, we all stepped in and positioned ourselves around the circular forum. It was impossible to avoid scrutiny here. Everyone was exposed.

Monokuma took his time telling us the rules. We were to find the “blackened” – the murderer. If we vote for the correct person, then they were to be punished. If we didn’t and the blackened escaped, then the rest of us would die.

What a scary thought…

None of us wanted to be directly responsible for someone else’s death, but we had to if we wanted to live because someone had already drawn first blood. We were going to have to send someone to die and I feared that it would only get worse from here.

“I think it’s obvious who killed Togami!” Souda pointed his finger at me. “She was right where he died and her footprints were all over the crime scene!”

“W-Wait! I’ve told you before, I don’t have anything to do with what happened!” I tried to defend myself. “I was just trying to grab a cup and then the lights went out! I couldn’t see anything at all! I was there at the wrong place and at the wrong time!” Like most unfortunate events in my life…

“That’s exactly what a murderer would say!” Saionji shouted back at me.

I looked down at my hands. Even with them clasped tightly in front of me, I couldn’t hide the trembles. If they voted me as the blackened, then not only was I going to die, everyone but the murderer would as well.

“We shouldn’t be so hasty. Let’s look at all the evidence,” Hinata cut in. “Togami’s body was found under the table beside a bloody knife that is covered with green paint. He was stabbed to death during the blackout. What did you find in your autopsy, Tsumiki-san?”

The shy nurse flushed as all attention fell on her. “W-Well… The s-stab wound w-w-was only 5mm w-wide and – “

“What do you mean 5mm wide?!” Kuzuryu demanded, crossing his arms as what they initially thought was thrown out the window. “The knife is clearly wider than that!”

Tsumiki squeaked, covering her head as if she was afraid the Ultimate Yakuza would hit her from across the room. “I’m s-s-s-sorry! I’m s-sorry I’m such a-a useless p-piece of trash th-that can’t even s-s-satisfy anyone!”

Kuzuryu scoffed before mumbling, “I never said that… Stop putting words in my mouth…”

“Go on, Tsumiki-san,” Hinata gently encouraged her.

The Ultimate Nurse gulped. “Y-Yes… Umm… S-So… He was stabbed with s-something that was 5mm w-w-wide, so it c-couldn’t p-p-possibly be d-done by the knife…”

Hinata nodded as he took everything in. “How strange… Not only that, how could anyone be able to kill during that blackout? There were no windows and no other form of light source. “

“Why don’t you ask _her_?” Saionji placed her hands on her hips as she leaned towards me with narrowed eyes. “How did you do it, you ugly pig-faced _murderer_?”

_“I. Didn’t. Do it!”_ I shouted back, tears of frustration threatening to spill from my eyes.

“Perhaps instead of talking to circles, we should consider all our options?” Komaeda suggested, trying to pacify everyone.

“He’s right,” Hinata agreed with a nod of his head.

“No, hang on! Why should we consider anyone else when it’s so obvious that Saeki did it?” Koizumi questioned, frowning at me.

It was hard to believe that only hours before, she had snapped my photo with such a kind smile. Where was it now?

“Look, I even took photos of everything!” She shoved the images to everyone.

It must’ve been taken right after the lights came back on because in the first photo, the table cloth still concealed the terrible truth inside. The trail of blood I had tracked away was also clearly visible. There was absolutely no denying that they were mine, but there had to be a way to prove my innocence!

“We should always consider all our options,” Hinata argued. “This isn’t just any trial. If we vote for the wrong person, all of us will die and the murderer will escape.”

At the reminder, everyone fell silent for a moment as Hinata’s words sank in. This wasn’t simply finding a scapegoat to blame and sweep under the rug, there was no going back once we got it wrong. Monokuma was going to kill all of us.

“Can we… move the conversation away from me for just a minute?” I whispered. “I know I’m the number one suspect, but…” My confidence wavered further. Anything I said would only make them think I was trying to defend myself. Would it do more harm than good for me?

Komaeda laughed. “You know, Rin-chan is the Ultimate Unlucky Student right? Most likely, she is going to end up being framed for this and then, we’ll all die. Seems like something that would happen to you, huh, Rin-chan?”

I nodded. This was exactly what would happen to me. This constant struggle of being framed was typically fruitless. I very rarely won those battles, so I learned to just keep silent and took the punishment. This, however, was different. The stakes were too high!

“Che… This talk is boring me. Can we move on now, then?” Kuzuryu scoffed.

And so, the debate went on. Hinata slowly laid down all the evidence again and all the possible ways Togami could’ve been killed during the black out.

“What if they used the power cord from the lamp? The culprit may not be able to see in the dark, but they could definitely follow it to the table. From there, they could stab Togami from under the table,” Hinata pondered. “Komaeda…”

Everything continued to go downhill from there.


	3. Chapter 3

“Alright, I’ll confess! I had planned everything. I sent Togami the note so that he’ll become paranoid. While I cleaned the old building, I set the two air conditioners to go off at the same time to cause the black out and I planted the knife under the table. I used the lamp cable to find my way to the knife,” Komaeda was speaking about it in a way that was so casual that it made my blood run cold. Someone died and he… orchestrated everything? “Unfortunately, I didn’t anticipate him to have night vision goggles and he immediately spotted me going for the knife.”

So that was why he cried out…

I clenched my hands. What kind of man was he? He had been so kind this entire time and now to find out that he killed someone? Was it true or was he just trying to save me? It didn’t work that way! He had to know that!

Then…

Did that mean he actually did it…?

Komaeda Nagito who had been nothing but kind to me…

Once again, I had foolishly decided to place my trust in the wrong person. I should’ve known better. With my luck… It was doomed from the start.

_Stupid_ …

Through the rest of the class trial, I was only half concentrating on the conversation. 

“Rin-chan…”

I refused to look at him.

“Saeki-san? It’s time to vote. If you don’t – “ Hinata was cut off by Monokuma.

“Anyone who doesn’t vote shall also be punished!”

Shakily and questioning everything I knew to be right, I submitted my vote. I should be happy that I wasn’t the one chosen, but there was just this disappointed emptiness.

“All right, everybody! The votes are in and let’s see the results!” Monokuma excitedly declared with his arm raised.

The screen displayed everyone’s photos and names. I noticed that I received two votes, but the rest were all for Hanamura. In the end, there were still two people who didn’t believe me.

“Good job! You have successfully voted for the blackened!” Monokuma cheered. His eyes glittered with malicious glee as he stared at the big button in front of his throne.

Hanamura began to wail in terror as his body shook. “I – I - I only wanted to go home!”

The cook had seen what the Ultimate Lucky Student planned to do and was going to try to stop him by… _killing Komaeda_ _first_. That thought didn’t comfort me at all. Two wrongs didn’t make a right and blaming Komaeda was useless.

No one forced Hanamura to kill and by killing, he knew that he was either going to die for his crimes or the rest of us were and from how desperately he wanted to go home to his sick mother, his intentions were clear.

Still, it was difficult to watch. He was so tiny and his chubby cheeks made him seem years younger than us.

His exclamation also hit us hard. We all wanted to leave this place where at any moment, we could die.

“Please… Please! Let me go home!”

“Time’s up! It’s punishment time!” Monokuma shouted, slamming his paw down on the button.

I couldn’t watch him be killed. His whimpers and desperate pleas were forever going to be ingrained in my head. 

An arm enveloped me and pushed my face against a warm chest as I heard explosions from behind me, but even then, I could still hear his muffled cries.

“Make it stop,” I mumbled into the shirt, pressing my hands over my ears.

A second pair of hands covered mine and I was finally able to silence the nightmare, if only temporarily.

An eternity passed before the hands lifted and mine dropped limply to my side. It was terrifyingly quiet. Not a single person spoke as the horror ended.

Komaeda leaned down. “It’s over now,” he whispered to me.

I continued to lean against him. Without his support, I was certain that I would collapse. My legs were shaking so hard that I was surprised I wasn’t already on the floor.

He gently led me out behind everyone else.

My eyes remained downcast. A wave of numbness consumed me as reality set in. This was all real. One person was killed and the other… _we_ killed.

Other than the two votes for me, everyone else was guilty.

When we were outside, I ran.

I ran and ran and didn’t stop, until I was safe in my cottage. Not long after, I could hear Komaeda banging on my door, but I refused to acknowledge him.

He was a liar.

Why did he want to start this Killing Game so badly? Couldn’t we just pretend everything was fine?

And if his plan actually worked and he killed Togami… Or if Hanamura’s plan worked and he was killed… No, his luck was clear. Things would always work out for him.

I let out a scream and began to throw anything I could find off the shelves. The plushies harmlessly hit the floor.

Fuck Komaeda!

Fuck this island!

And most of all, fuck Monokuma!

What was this twisted piece of fucking shit?!

As the anger faded, the tears returned. I cried until I passed out on the bed.

When I next woke up, I was still feeling defeated. My eyes were bloodshot and sore from rubbing. I didn’t want to leave my cottage and face the others, but I was going to have to eventually.

After combing through my hair, brushing my teeth, and doing my best to look somewhat presentable, I had to give up. It was a lost cause.

I had to talk myself into opening the door and when I did, I immediately slammed it back closed, or I tried to… because Komaeda had popped out of nowhere and stopped me. “Wait! Rin-chan, can we please talk?” he pleaded, looking at me with sad, puppy eyes.

Knowing that I lost, I let out a cry of frustration before stomping back to my bed to dive beneath the covers.

“Rin-chan!” He followed suited and tried to pry the blanket away, but I refused to let go. I didn’t want to see his stupid face!

“Leave me alone! I hate you!” I shouted, but he refused to give up. He kept tugging and tugging, until the fabric was stripped away from my fingers and his muted green eyes blinked at me with concern. “Why won’t you leave me alone…?”

He allowed the blanket to drop at my waist. “I don’t know,” he confessed. “It just felt like the right thing to do. Since I have become aware of my luck, I’ve learned to listen to my instincts. It’s telling me to not let you get away, so stop running from me, it’s useless. I’ll always find you.”

What kind of stupid reply was that?!

“Rin-chan…” His voice sent shivers down my spine, while his eyes became dark with what was akin to… desire. He ran a long, pale finger down my cheek and stopped at my neck, right above my pulse. “Give yourself to me.”

My eyes widened before a loud sound echoed in the room. The sharp noise of flesh against flesh as his head turned from the impact of my palm smacking his face. “Stop spouting out nonsense!”

I pushed him off me and managed to throw him off balance. He tumbled over the side of the bed with shocked eyes.

“Get out! Get out!” I screamed at him.

“Saeki-san? Are you… alright…?” I could hear Pekoyama just outside my door. “Do you need help?”

Keeping my eyes cautiously on Komaeda, I replied, “I’m fine. I’m sorry for disturbing you. I just dropped something on the floor.”

“… Very well…” she seemed to sigh as she obviously knew that I was lying. “Do not hesitate to tell me if something or… someone is bothering you. My cottage is right beside yours, so I _will_ hear it.”

“Yes, I will. Thank you, Pekoyama-san.”

When silence fell upon us once, Komaeda got up from the floor. He had a thoughtful look on his face before his usual grin took over. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to upset or scare you.”

Huh?

What was this sudden mood swing?

“I’ll be getting out of your hair now, but you should go get some breakfast, okay? Don’t want you to go hungry. You’re tiny enough as it is.” With that, he was gone.

Did that really just happen?

Besides, _he_ was one to talk. From the moments I had spent with him, I could tell he was almost just skin and bones. At least I have a _little_ bit of meat.

Pekoyama appeared in front of me from the door Komaeda left opened. Her face was as emotionless and observant as ever, but there was a hint of concern in her eyes. “I thought I’d stay to guard outside just in case.”

“Hello,” I numbly greeted her.

“There is something strange about him. I don’t presume to know much about your relationship, but I’d advise caution,” she stated. 

She was right. In a way, it was foolish of me to be alone with Komaeda when I knew what he was capable of, but it wasn’t as if this was the first time. He had been inside my cottage after I had foolishly gotten hurt because of the Monobeast. 

“I won’t get myself killed,” I told her, but as soon as the words left my lips, I flinched. Had I just jinxed myself? I was basically the Ultimate Jinx. That meant that nothing I wanted was going to come true. “Let’s just go to breakfast, okay?”

She nodded and the two of us entered the hotel restaurant where almost everyone was sat down with plates of food in front of them. I didn’t know who cooked, but seeing this made me think of Hanamura, which led to the thought of Togami – our fearless leader who had died trying to protect us.

I rubbed my eyes.

“Good morning, Peko-san, Saeki-san,” Mahiru greeted us with a wave of her hand.

It was as if they hadn’t viciously accused me of murder the day before. We were suddenly… _friends_. It felt hollow to me and I didn’t feel like joining in on their light conversation. I kept silent with only hums and nods as my replies whenever they addressed me.

“Saeki-chan, are you still… angry at Ibuki?” the musician asked with sad eyes, poking her index fingers together.

“No,” I quietly told her. Ibuki was rather neutral yesterday. She merely stated what she heard and didn’t take a side. “I’m just… cautious. As you all know by now, I was accepted into Hope’s Peak Academy as the Ultimate Unlucky Student. I am used to being accused of many things I haven’t done, but that doesn’t mean that it hurt every time.”

“That is such a tragic existence…” Sonia clasped her hands together. “I apologise for what happened yesterday.”

Her apology was echoed by everyone else at the table, which included Mioda, Koizumi, and Pekoyama.

“I want to be able to trust all of you, but… given the circumstances, that’s a little difficult,” I truthfully told them.

Pekoyama spoke up again. “No, it is good to be cautious. We are all strangers and clearly, there are people desperate enough to kill.”

After breakfast, I felt a little better, but as I was leaving the restaurant, Koizumi ran up to me with a scowl on her face. “Saeki-san!” she called out. There was a tray of food in her hands and she looked as if she was about to explode. “Your boyfriend is being the biggest douche bag in the world! He said he doesn’t like rice! Please help me bring food to him because if I go in again, I’ll punch him in the face!”

I was confused. What was she talking about? “Boyfriend? Who - ?”

She pushed the tray with a piece of toast, a bowl of soup, and a glass of water into my hands before pointing towards the direction of the old building from yesterday. Without another word, she stormed off.

I was a little hesitant to go there, but my curiosity was peeked. Surely, this couldn’t be a trap, right…?

Besides, who did she mean when she said boyfriend? I didn’t have one.

When I arrived, I opened the door and froze at the sight in front of me.

“Ah… Rin-chan… Did you come to feed me?” he purred, his eyes twinkling mischievously despite the situation he found himself in. “I’ve been thinking about you all day, but I didn’t think you’d ever trouble yourself with someone as despicable as me.”

Who had done this to him? His wrists were chain behind him and his ankles were tied by rope.

I slowly sat the tray down in front of him. “Komaeda-san, what happened? Who did this?”

“Hm?” He smiled. “Souda-san and Nidai-san caught me as I was making my way down to the restaurant right after I left your cottage. Koizumi-san came over earlier to bring me food, but alas, I hate rice. I was a little embarrassed to ask her to feed me, but… you would help me, wouldn’t you, Rin-chan?”

Looking down at the tray and then back at him, I sighed. “Komaeda-san… I thought you were supposed to be lucky… How did you manage to get caught?”

He laughed. “But don’t you see? By getting tied up, Rin-chan came to feed me. I feel so fortunate…” A soft blush filled his cheeks as he looked up at me.

“P-Please don’t say strange things like that,” I mumbled, stirring the soup a couple of times before setting it down again.

I scooted forward to help him sit up. It was a bit of a challenge as the rope and cuffs bit into his skin. I could see the raw skin peek through, but not once did he express any pain. 

For a moment, I contemplated trying to free him, but he merely smiled as he figured out what I was thinking. “Leave me as I am. It’s not so bad. Besides, I don’t want Rin-chan to get into trouble.”

“This is wrong, Komaeda-san. I know you were behaving a little crazy yesterday, but you don’t deserve this.” I gently ran my hand along one of his wounds. It was so red.

He giggled. “Feed me, Rin-chan.”

I huffed.

He wasn’t paying attention to what I was saying, at all…

I picked up the bowl of soup again and brought the spoon to his lips. He took a sip before wincing. “Hot…”

“Ah!” Of course. It was still steaming. Oops…

I scooped up another spoonful, but blew on it first this time.

He happily consumed the liquid and even asked for the toast before draining the glass of water.

After I put every back on the tray, I suddenly fell backwards as a body tipped me over.

“I’m so happy… I can stay like this forever…” he mumbled, nuzzling my chest. “Even if I die here… I’ll die happy… So full of joy… and hope…”

I was certain he could hear my heart racing in my chest. “G-Get off me.” I tried to push his face away, but it was no use. Despite being skinny, he was still too strong for me. I was such a weakling. “Komaeda-san…”

His hot breath seeping through my clothes and on to my skin brought heat spreading throughout my body. “Rin-chan…”

“Saeki-san, Koizumi-san told me that – “

Ah…

Hinata had burst in and was now looking at us with a shocked look on his face.

All of our faces were bright red.

“Hinata-san… Please help me get Komaeda-san off me,” I mumbled, unable to look him in the eyes.

“Y-Yeah…” he stuttered, pushing the snow-haired weirdo to the side, while I scrambled back and hastily picked up the tray. 

“Thank you, Hinata-san. Can we please just forget that ever happened?” The last thing I needed was for more people to think Komaeda and I were more than what we actually were.

“Of course…” He was also avoiding my eyes, while Komaeda stared at us with a loopy smile.

Luckily, Komaeda kept quiet and I was able to leave with a scrap of my dignity left.

Hinata accompanied me to the restaurant where I returned the dishes. Monomi was also there, waiting for us and trying to talk to whoever was still there, but no one seemed to be listening to her.

“Monomi-chan?” I tilted my head at the bunny. “Are you alright?”

She turned to me, her eyes brightened up and tears streamed down her face. “Saeki-chan! I am well! I just defeated one of the Monobeasts, so you can visit that island now!”

“Oh! That’s wonderful news. Thank you, but… Are you okay?” I asked again when I noted how there were bandages on her head.

She nodded, balling up her tiny paws with fire in her eyes. “I’m fine! Nothing a formal magical girl can’t do! I will try my best to defeat the next one, too!”

I gave her an affectionate pat on the head. “Don’t work yourself too hard, okay? They’re pretty scary.”

“Thank you, Saeki-chan!”


	4. Chapter 4

Once we all gathered on the second island, Monokuma popped up to tell us a new motive. There was a game here, called Twilight Syndrome Murder Case. I couldn’t imagine what could be in there to cause someone to resort to murder, but it was slowly becoming clear to me that we were no longer working with logic in mind.

Not only that, Togami and Hanamura’s deaths were still fresh. To have to prepare for another murder already was putting us all on edge. 

I decided to explore the new island a little. I walked by a diner and beach house before entering the pharmacy. I searched the aisles behind the counter for a familiar medication. It was under a brand name I didn’t recognise, but the active ingredient was still the same. That should be fine. I took several bottles and stuffed them into my pockets.

“S-S-Saeki-san?” I heard a quiet voice stutter from behind me.

Slowly, I stood up to face the nurse. “Hi, Tsumiki-san.”

“A-a-are you ok-okay?” she asked with a concerned look on her face. “D-Do you n-n-need any h-help?”

I shook my head. “No, I’m fine. I just wanted to look around and got some of this. I hope that’s alright.” I shook one of the bottles in front of me.

“O-Oh!” She appeared alarmed and began to verbally reprimand herself.

“It’s fine, Tsumiki-san. Can you keep it a secret, though?” I asked. “I need this and you know it’s nothing harmful.” 

She nodded. “O-Of course! Your s-s-secret is s-safe with me!”

“Thank you.” I smiled at her before leaving. I also grabbed a few rolls of bandages and disinfectants on my way out.

By the end of the exploration, it was late, so I headed back to the restaurant to retrieve tonight’s dinner and headed to feed Komaeda who was still in the same position as when Hinata rolled him over.

“You’re back!” he happily exclaimed when he noticed I entered the building. “I’m so glad you haven’t abandoned me. It would be only fitting to leave a useless piece of trash like me to rot here. The fact that you returned, I feel truly grateful for your kindness.”

“Don’t call yourself that, Komaeda-san,” I sighed. “You’re not trash. You’re just a little strange, but that’s fine because we all are, aren’t we?”

I slowly pulled him up as I did last time and ripped a small portion of sour dough bread before spreading soft butter on to its soft insides.

“Ah… Your delicate hands shouldn’t be soiled for me,” he cooed, looking at my hands as if they were made of precious gems. “All I do is cause trouble for everyone around me…”

“Komaeda-san, stop,” I stole him. “Stop being so self-deprecating. You’re _not_ useless and you’re _not_ any worse than the other students because of your talent. You are judged by your actions, so please… No more killing or plotting unless it’s self defense. I don’t want anything to happen to you or anyone else.”

His shoulders dropped. “You’re truly incredible… You even have hope for someone as useless as – “

Frowning, I stuffed the piece of bread into his opened mouth. “No more, Komaeda-san. You have to value life – whether it’s your own or someone else’s. You’re the Ultimate Lucky Student, so surely, there’s something for you to be happy about.”

Unlike me…

He chewed for a moment before swallowing. “Yes. I’ve found what I need to keep going.” A small, content smile spread across his face. “I have something precious to live for and protect.”

I smiled back at him. “Then keep that in mind and keep fighting. I’ll see if I can convince Souda-san to free you tomorrow, so be good, okay?”

He hummed, bobbing his head. “As long as you’re with me, I’ll be good!”

What a conditional statement…

“Alright, then.” I pulled out a blanket I found in the market and wrapped it around him. “I’ll be back tomorrow. Have a good night, Komaeda-san.”

“Good night, Rin-chan.”

I returned to my cottage. Things were changing so quickly. In a matter of days, we had to witness two deaths and Komaeda was tied up. Not to mention being kidnapped here…

The next morning, I approached Souda like I said I would and gave him my rather reasonable request.

“What?! Are you crazy?! No way! No fuckin’ way in Hell!” he shouted.

“Please, Souda-san. He promised that he wouldn’t try anything. We can’t just have him tied up, until we find a way back.” I tried to convince him, but he was having none of it.

“Ha! I would leave him here even if we _could_ go home,” he grumbled. “He’s a menace to society.”

Knowing that the mechanic wouldn’t budge, I went to find Nidai. For such a loud individual, he was actually a very good listener and could see the merit of working together as a whole instead of being distrustful of each other.

We went over to Komaeda who was still dozing on the floor. He had managed to completely bury himself beneath the blanket with only several locks peeking out.

“Komaeda-san… Komaeda-san!” I pulled down the cover and shook him awake. “Good morning.”

He blinked his bleary eyes before giving me a dreamy smile. “It is wonderful waking up to your beautiful face. I can only hope that I will be able to do it again.”

“Stop saying weird things. It’s too early in the morning,” I huffed.

“I apologise. You make me so happy that I can’t do anything but express it.” He was still being weird, but at least he was getting freed, so I didn’t have to keep feeding him.

“Good luck, Saeki-san. Anything happens because of him, I’m sure the others will think you’re responsible too,” Nidai warned me.

I nodded. I figured as much and I was prepared for it this time.

“Don’t worry, Rin-chan. I promise I won’t be any trouble for you.” He wrapped his newly freed arms around my waist, while I tried to squirm away.

“S-Stop! Let me go!”

Once I managed to detangle him from me, we headed to the restaurant where he could choose his own food.

Everyone’s eyes immediately snapped to the white-haired male beside me and Souda was absolutely enraged, but I ignored the racket he made to sit where I was waved over. Mioda, Owari, Tsumiki, and Sonia smiled when I placed myself at the edge.

“How did you manage to get him out?” Owari asked in between bites of food. 

“I asked Nidai-san and he was kind enough to hear me out,” I replied, reaching over to pour myself a glass of orange juice.

I looked over to where Komaeda had plopped down by a reluctant Hinata who was sitting at the table beside us. Souda was also there and it looked as if he was about to stab the fair-skinned boy with a fork. Hopefully it’ll turn out alright…

Sonia smiled. “I am glad. It is not good to have distention among the people.”

“Y-Y-Yes, I ag-agree…” Tsumiki shyly added, poking at her scrambled eggs.

“Ibuki thinks it’s fan-tas-tic~!” she exclaimed, bouncing in her seat.

This was a good sign. They were accepting of his return. 

Changing the topic, Owari suggested a girl’s day out in the pool to train our muscles and it seemed fun, so we told Pekoyama, Saionji, Koizumi, and Nanami as well.

We all crowded inside the Rocketpunch Market, looking at all the different designs in the racks.

I grabbed a simple black one piece in my size and also a cover up dress. I wanted to be able to make good relations with the others, but…

I didn’t know how to swim!

Uncertain, I sat on the edge of the pool and dipped my feet into the cool water, kicking up small waves, while Mioda tried to get me to join her.

“Come on, Saeki-chan! Ibuki wants to plaaaay~!” she whined, tugging at my right leg.

“You can play with Nanami-san, Owari-san, and Saionji-san. I think Saionji-san is about to kill someone if you don’t join them soon.” The tiny blonde was glaring and throwing a tantrum as she was forced to wait. “Besides, if I join you, you’ll have an odd number of people and that won’t work.”

Mioda pouted. “Then you have to join later!” she demanded with one finger pointed at my face. 

I nodded, having no intentions to comply when the time came.

It was strange seeing everyone so happy after two people just died, but… what else were we even to do? This Killing Game was active whether we liked it or not. Perhaps this way, we’d be close enough to forget all about it.

“Hinata-san, have you seen Koizumi-san and Pekoyama-san? They should’ve been here by now,” I asked him.

Somehow, Hinata and Souda heard about this gathering and managed to join us without too much trouble. It was a little disconcerting, especially with how Souda’s eyes were trained on Sonia. What a pervert…

At least he was distracted from how I managed to convince Nidai to free Komaeda. I really didn’t need him deafening my ears.

“No, I haven’t seen them,” he replied, taking a seat beside me as we watched the group. “Are you okay? I know it was stressful for everyone yesterday, but you were…”

I looked down at where my legs disappeared into the water. “I’m fine,” I quietly answered. “I have to be, right?”

He fell silent beside me, but just by sitting here, I could feel his support. Hinata wasn’t quick to make impulsive decisions and he weighed out everything, so I was comfortable with him here.

Fifteen minutes later, Pekoyama arrived already soaking wet. At our questioning gazes, she pinned us with her piercing red eyes. “I was swimming in the ocean, hoping to find something for us to leave the island or even a glimpse of what could be in the distance, but there was nothing.” 

She jumped into the pool and joined the others, triggering Mioda’s return.

‘We need you now that Peko-chan is here!” She was pulling at my leg, again.

“I… I don’t…”

“You prooooomised!” she whined, pouting at me with large, puppy eyes.

“I can’t… I can’t swim,” I finally confessed, bringing my hair up to hide the blush on my face.

Her mouth formed a perfect ‘o’ as she stared at me.

Suddenly, a chin fell on my right shoulder, causing me to let out a surprised squeak.

“I can teach you,” he offered, his lips a breadth’s length away from my ear. “It’s the least I can do for feeding me, Rin-chan.”

I pushed him away from me with wide eyes. “W-What are you doing here?!” I cried, bumping into Hinata as I leaned back as an attempt to draw more distance between us.

Komaeda gave me a closed-eyes smile. “What do you mean? Hinata-kun and Souda-kun are in here, so it seems to be co-ed. I saw all of you and decided to join in on the fun.” His face suddenly dropped and sadness filled his minty eyes. “Of course, I’d understand if you wouldn’t want me here. I _am_ a worthless nobody after all. If I go into the water, I could pollute it. I don’t deserve to be in the presence of such hopeful Ultimates.”

Seeing him like this, my heart clenched and I couldn’t understand why. He was a stranger who was practically stalking me! And was this just another ploy to gain my sympathy just so he could do even weirder things?

When his eyes slid to the right as if he was recalling painful memories, however, I caved in.

“Komaeda-san…” I sighed. “You can stay, but… I’m not getting into the water.”

He smiled again and hummed at me before taking a seat on my other side. “That’s fine. I’ll teach you another day – a private lesson with just the two of us.”

_Why_ did it feel as if I had fallen into his trap?!

Mioda looked from Komaeda to me before her eyes lit up. “Oh! Rin-chan likes Komaeda-chan! Ahh~!” Her eyes grew hearts as she flailed her arms in excitement, splashing water everywhere. “That is sooo cute! Ibuki wants to know more~!”

“What?! That’s not true, I – “

“That’s right… Rin-chan is too good for someone like me. Such a lowly being such as myself could never even dream that she’d want to spend her time with me.”

As Komaeda was about to leave, I instinctively grabbed his hand.

Everyone froze.

“Rin-chan…” Komaeda’s smile was sad as he gently pried my hand from his. “It’s okay. I understand.”

It felt wrong watching him walk away.

_“A body has been discovered! After a certain amount of time, the class trial will begin!”_

What?

A body?

Who…?

I was on my feet and out of the pool in a matter of minutes.

Kuzuryu was standing outside with a frown on his face, while Komaeda was inside the Beach House. I could also see Nidai in the distance punching a tree in anger.

“What happened…?” I mumbled.

Another murder so quick?

“It must be the motive,” Hinata stated.

Then someone must’ve played Twilight Syndrome Murder Case and fell right into Monokuma’s trap. Not good…

Komaeda was suddenly punched in the face by Souda who was shouting at him. “You bastard! I knew we shouldn’t have let you go! Should’ve let you rot in that fuckin’ room! You killed her before you came to the pool, didn’t you?! No one else could’ve done it!”

“Souda-san, wait! We don’t know if he had anything to do with this, yet.” Hinata was ever the voice of reason.

Komaeda rubbed his quickly bruising cheek. “It’s fine. It’s to be expected, after all, but for what it’s worth, I had nothing to do with this. I promised someone important that I wouldn’t hurt anyone.”

Huh? Someone important… 

Did he mean… me?

I thought he was doing it for a friend, a family, a lover. Not someone as insignificant as me…

I shook my head. That sounded too much like him. No doubt we’ve been spending too much time together.

Looking back at Koizumi’s body, I wondered why they would kill her of all people. Judging by how the back of her head was completely caved in from the bat, it seemed like a crime of passion. I never played the game, so I couldn’t say I know what the motive was or if it was personal for someone. Would Hinata or Komaeda know?

I watched as the latter begin his investigation despite Souda trying to stop him.

Feeling a light lightheaded from the overwhelming scent of blood, I decided to step out and nearly crashed into Tanaka. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t watching where I was going.”

“Ha! As expected from a mere mortal such as yourself! Worry not, a tiny being like you would never be able to harm someone like me!” He let out a somewhat ominous laugh that was ruined by the four adorable fluff balls that popped out of his pockets.

I reached out a hand towards the cute one that had dozed off and surprisingly, Tanaka allowed me to pet him. “They’re so cute,” I mumbled.

He hid the bottom of his face behind his scarf as I saw something akin to a blush wash over his cheeks. “Th-They are _not_ cute! They are dangerous! They are my Four Dark Devas of Destruction!”

Despite of the situation, I smiled. What an interesting person. “Yes, you’re right.”

“Ah!” I let out a startled cry when someone bumped into me from behind.

“Sorry, Rin-chan!” Komaeda smiled unapologetically at me. “I didn’t mean to bump into you, but investigation time is over and we should start heading to Monokuma Rock for the class trial.”

I nodded. “Okay.”

We were about to lose another person or perhaps even everyone else if we weren’t careful.

“Are you nervous?” he asked me as we took our places once more around the console.

“Of course. Even if no one suspects me, this is still all very devastating and to be honest, I don’t even want to think that someone else here is a murderer.”

“Ah… I truly envy your hope…” He hugged himself with a dreamy expression. ‘I can almost feel it on my skin…”

Was that… drool?!

I really couldn’t even begin to understand him!

“Alright, everyone!” Monokuma shouted. “The second class trial is now in session!’

Immediately, Souda pointed his finger at Komaeda. “It’s him! We all know it’s him! His girlfriend released him and suddenly, there’s another death! If that’s not proof enough, I don’t know what is!”

Here we go, again…

“We shouldn’t be so hasty with our decision,” Sonia disagreed, causing Souda’s face to fall and his confidence to plummet. “We must look at all the evidence like last time instead of being governed by our emotions.”

Wow… When she introduced herself as the Ultimate Princess, I didn’t think she’d actually be so diplomatic. I thought she’d be more like the spoiled princess from movies, but I’m glad she proved me wrong.

“Yes, though his aura is dark, I believe there is more to this case than that,” Tanaka agreed.

As the trial progressed, Hinata and Komaeda piled evidence against Pekoyama after the mystery of Twilight Syndrome Murder Case was solved. According to the game, Kuzuryu’s sister was murdered by someone from Koizumi’s group of friends. Because of this, the swordswoman murdered the photographer for her… master.

Her dedication stemmed from the years they grew up together. They had become each other’s everything and now…

“I am merely my master’s tool!” Pekoyama argued once everyone voted for her. “I am not a person. He is the true blackened!”

Kuzuryu’s gritted his teeth, a look of pain clearly on his face. Monokuma even gave him a chance to confirm this, which would mean we’d all die for choosing the wrong person. Not only that, he admitted that Pekoyama had become someone dear to him and would never see her as a mere tool.

It was one of the most heartbreaking things I had ever seen.

As Pekoyama’s execution commenced, Kuzuryu slipped in, walking up to her with determination on his face. It was clear that he wanted to die with her. 

“Kuzuryu-san!” I screamed right before a hand covered my eyes and I heard the group gasp in unison. “K-Komaeda-san…”

“Don’t watch,” he whispered.

I could still hear the bodies fall and everyone screaming and crying around me.

He steered me away when it was over, leaving the rest to deal with the aftermath.

“He’s still alive!”

“Help him!”

Surprisingly, Monokuma called for an ambulance. The strange looking paramedics carted him off and then, he was gone where we could not help him.

“Something like this…” Owari growled. “Unforgiveable!”

“Ibuki is worried for the baby yakuza…”

With heavy hearts, we all departed from Monokuma Rock and as we headed to the cottages, I stuck close to Komaeda. “H-Hey… Do you think you could…?”

“Hm?” He tilted his head.

“Do you think you could s-stay with m-m-me?” I shyly asked.

He suddenly stopped walking and I knew I must’ve said something wrong.

My face flushed red. ‘I’m sorry! Forget it! It was just a passing thought – not even worth a consideration!”

His face was as red as mine and drool trailed down the side of his chin as he stared at me with swirling eyes. “No, I would love to stay with you, but for someone so great to ask trash like me to grace her bed…”

“D-Don’t phrase it like that!” I protested. I was growing lightheaded from how much blood was rushing to my head and a part of me was still in shock with what just happened.

He smiled, following me to my cottage.


	5. Chapter 5

When the door closed, the room became stifling. There was this unexplained attraction towards this strange man and it was causing so much confusion inside me. Inviting him in may truly be a mistake, but he was the only one here who made me feel safe.

“Rin-chan…” He wrapped his arms around me from behind. “You know you’ll never have to worry, right? I’ll protect you.”

I turned to look him in the eyes. “Do you really think your luck is stronger than mine?

He chuckled, sadly. “I am always plagued with misfortune before luck strikes. When I was in elementary school, I went on vacation with my parents. The plane became hijacked, but a meteorite the size of a fish struck the hijacker, but it also hit my parents. They died instantly. I was really sad, but I also gained freedom and their rather large inheritance.” There was a smile on his face, but his eyes were filled with pain. “A few years later, I was kidnapped and stuffed into a garbage bag. Inside was a lottery ticket. When the police found me, I remembered that the ticket was in my pocket and when I checked the number, I found that I won three hundred million dollars!”

My head spun as I tried to comprehend his incredible stories. Were these really real? They were so bizarre, but also filled with immense sadness. If they were as he said, then it was no wonder that he turned out like this.

“That’s how I know that no matter how much despair there is, hope will always win,” he concluded as if he had just told me a simple bed time story. “I will always side with hope!” His mind began to wader as he started to drool, once more.

Even though he didn’t seem outwardly affected by his past anymore, I found myself holding him as tightly as I could.

He seemed shocked at first, but returned the tight embrace, placing his chin on top of my head.

“How are you so strong?” I whispered. I had my own slew of misfortune and although it never led to anything good, a tragedy was a tragedy and Komaeda dealt with it so much better than me. I was an absolute mess after my parents died and through each of my foster families, pain and death continued to follow me. “I had fallen apart so many times.”

He gave me an alarmed look. “Oh, no! Please, do not praise a ne’er do well like me. I could never be as great as – “

“Stop it! Stop degrading yourself! Can’t you see you’re better than that?” I shouted. “While you see the brighter side of things, I… I…” I couldn’t push past those the traumatic memories.

He brushed my hair back with his long, pale fingers. “Rin-chan… You don’t see what I see. I see a strong woman who is filled with glittering hope. You shine so brightly that sometimes, it’s difficult to cast my worthless eyes on you.”

I shook my head. “If you can stop saying bad things about yourself, we’ll just agree to disagree.”

Taking the hand that was stroking my hair, I looked him in the eyes and brushed his finger tips against my lips. Both our faces were flushed, but I refused to let him go.

“Okay, Rin-chan.” He pressed his forehead against mine and for the first time in my life, I didn’t feel so alone anymore. I was actually content and it made me happy that he was happy.

Since there was only one bed, Komaeda offered to sleep on the couch, but I was the one who had asked him to stay here, so I pushed him on to the mattress. After gathering an extra pillow and blanket from the closet, I made my way towards the couch.

I didn’t get very far before his hand grabbed my own and everything was dropped on to the floor. “Join me here then, Rin-chan. This bed is big enough for the both of us.”

It was a mistake looking at him.

His snowy hair was splayed out around him like a halo and his eyes were half-hooded, tempting me in. “Don’t leave me alone on your bed,” he purred. “I need you to keep me warm. It’s always so cold and lonely at night. It would make me very happy if I could wake up to your beautiful face, but…” His eyes suddenly glittered with tears and he had a self-loathing smile on his lips. ‘I’d understand that you wouldn’t want to be so close to something so despicable.”

Was he serious or was he just trying to rile me up?! How many times did I have to repeat that he wasn’t worthless?!

Nonetheless, I foolishly gave in to his trap, allowing him to pull me beneath the covers. He draped an arm around my waist and his body wasn’t even an inch away from mine. His hand lazily played with the tips of my long hair.

Did he even understand that he was driving me crazy? Could he feel how fast my heart was beating? It was the only thing I could hear as it pounded erratically in my chest.

“I’m so happy,” he whispered. “I’m so happy…”

I tilted my head to see him staring at me with a gentle smile. My own lips quirked upward. “I’m happy too, Komaeda-kun.”

Ignoring how awkward this should’ve been, I snuggled against him and quickly fell asleep, vaguely noting how quickly his heart was also beating.

When I woke up the next morning, I was greeted by half hooded green orbs. Was this real or a dream? It was so nice and warm here. Kind of felt like I was floating on a cloud.

I hummed contently before feeling my eyes droop closed once more. I was safe. No one would be able to hurt me here.

_His hand ran down my body and tugged eagerly at the hem of my shirt. My name was like soft velvet on his lips before they latched on to the side of my neck, gently sucking and nibbling._

_“Open yourself to me,” he groaned, pressing his body against mine. He felt so good. “Let me in.”_

_Panting, I spread my legs._

_“Komaeda-kun…”_

“Yes, Rin-chan?”

My eyes snapped open and I realised that I had somehow managed to climb on top of him, lying down with my legs on either side of his. “K-Komaeda-san! I’m s-s-sorry!” I squeaked, jumping off him. Unfortunately, my feet got tangled in the sheets and I face planted on to the floor.

A cold breeze brushed my upper thigh and caressed somewhere higher.

“Ah!” I heard Komaeda gasp.

Quickly, I rolled over and pulled down my nightie. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” I definitely sounded like Tsumiki, but what else was I supposed to say?! 

I couldn’t believe that I had just flashed him! It was far too early in the morning for all this! No! This should never, ever have happened!

Clamping my mouth shut, I locked myself in the bathroom and began to freshen up, hoping to wash away all the embarrassment and shame, but it was no use. My face remained red hot and I couldn’t calm my racing heart. 

With the haze of last night gone, I found myself regretting asking him to stay with me. Things were going to be so awkward between us now. What had I done?!

By the time I was brave enough to come out, Komaeda was gone. All that was left of him was a scribble of a heart on a piece of paper he had placed on my pillow.

Ugh… 

If my heart didn’t stop pounding against my chest, I was going to pass out!

I changed into my day clothes and left to find him waiting for me outside of my cottage. He was already dressed and looked as if last night never happened.

Not as if anything really happened.

“Ready for breakfast?” He smiled, extending his hand towards me.

He escorted me to the restaurant where we were greeted by an eerie sight. There was something akin to a shrine of Koizumi’s photos. It was set up on the small stage with ribbons draped around the stands and tea lights everywhere.

“What a despairing sight…” Komaeda muttered under his breath.

I looked over to Souda who was freaking out and even Tanaka whom I thought would participate in something like this hated it. 

As it turned out, Saionji was the one to make this and everyone’s reaction was enough to make her burst into bears again. She did seem particularly close to the photographer, clinging on to her as if she was an older sister. 

Sure, Saionji was a bit mean and crass sometimes, but she was still human and grieving. I felt bad for her and everyone’s reactions probably weren’t helping.

I walked over to her with a soft sigh. “I’m sure she appreciates your effort. Don’t mind anyone else’s words. You’re the one who knew her best here, okay?”

Saionji sniffed, looking at me with a red nose and wide, watery eyes. “Do you… really think so? She was so n-nice to me – teaching me how to tie my obi… I just… I just… I just really miss her!” She began to wail.

Her crying made everyone quiet down and we all tried to comfort her, but for something like this, time may be the only thing to help her heal.

I couldn’t imagine Komaeda dying and hopefully, I would never have to see it from to life.

“Hello, everyone!” Monomi suddenly popped out of nowhere. She was looking even worse than last time with her head heavily bandaged and one eye covered. There was swelling and scratches everywhere, but she was in a rather good mood. “I have defeated another Monobeast!”

Oh! Another island was available to us now? That was some good news. Perhaps we could find a way out soon because I really didn’t want to see anyone else die. Despite the rocky start, I was really starting to care for them all.

Once we finished breakfast, we all headed across the bridge and the first thing I noticed was the looming tower that was the hospital. It was where Kuzuryu was currently being tended to.

“Let’s not go there, yet,” I mumbled.

Komaeda nodded and led me around the small island. In the end, we ended up in front of a theatre. “Want to watch a movie with me?”

There was only one movie showing and it was called The Wizard of Monomi. The fact that Monokuma was so eager for us to watch made me cautious and the frown on my face was predictably misunderstood by Komaeda who was quick to apologise. He thought I didn’t want to watch a movie with him and that was not the case.

“Stop it!” I huffed, crossing my arms. “It’s not that at all! If you would stop putting words in my mouth, then maybe you’ll see that I truly _do_ enjoy your company, so _please_ stop thinking so poorly of _me_. If you’re actually a real advocate of hope, then that shouldn’t be so hard to believe, right?”

His eyes sparkled and drool dripped from the corner of his lips. “As expected from an Ultimate. How splendid… Your hope fills me so completely…” He hugged himself as if he could physically feel it.

“Alright, you saps!” Monokuma spat out. “You’re here to watch the movie or not? Go in before you make me puke!”

He shoved a ticket into each of our hands. “You can’t give this to anyone else and you can only watch it at this time! I even stamped them for you. Off ya go! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do! Puhuhuhuhuhu!”

Our faces flushed as we hurried into the darkness to find that the seats were all empty and we were the only ones there.

He found my hand and tugged me to the centre with the best view. “I’m so happy that you decided to watch a movie with me, Rin-chan.”

I smiled, squeezing his hand.

Once the movie started, I immediately regret coming in here. I really wouldn’t even call this monstrosity a movie. It was an absolute wreck and made absolutely no sense!

Komaeda laid his head on top of my head, grumbling quietly about how awful this was. I blindly patted his head, nearly poking him in the eyes. “It’s alright. I don’t think there’s much more of this left.” At least, I hoped not. My brain was seconds away from leaking out of my ears. At least I was with Komaeda.

Feeling him so close to me now… His warm emanating from his body…

“No!” he whined. “I really wanted out first date to be enjoyable. I knew my luck was going to run out soon, but not now…”

I giggled, feeling my face heat up. He was being so silly. “A date?”

There was a sharp intake of breath. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed. I knew someone like you would never – “

I leaned my head away from him, so that I could look him in the eyes. Half of his face was illuminated by the screen, giving him and his white hair a rather ethereal glow. Unable to resist, I stopped him mid-sentence with a kiss. 

I didn’t know where the sudden courage came from, but I didn’t regret my decision because he pulled me closer. 

His lips were slightly chapped and neither of us really seemed to know what to do, but I enjoyed the kiss nonetheless. 

“Rin-chan…” he breathed. “Am I dreaming? I don’t want to wake up if I am.”

I shook my head. “This is real. I… I really like you, Komaeda-kun.”

He gave me a dopey smile and even in the darkness, a soft, adorable blush could be seen on his face. “I think I can die happy, now. This feeling in my chest… I never thought it could ever possibly be returned.”

“When? When did you start feeling this way for me?” I quietly asked, my heart was almost so loud that I could barely concentrate on much else. I never really thought this would come to be either. Komaeda was a rollercoaster for me. He was so nice, but he was also scheming and always had his own agenda of how things should go. He also had a terrible habit of insulting himself, but most of all… he had so much hope. Just as he gravitated towards people possessing it, I also found myself doing the same.

“When I first saw you, I already knew that I was caught. Still, I waited for you to get rid of me and after the first class trial, I thought that was it. Rin-chan would never want to be with a despicable creature like me.” He laughed sadly at himself.

I pecked his lips again to remind him that his perception of reality was just a little off. “Stop… It’s your actions that define who you are, not this luck cycle you have. It’s what you make of it and… _You’re_ the one to make me realise this. We both had terrible pasts, but despite that, you still hold so much hope. Unlike me, but… you’re helping me to heal… to understand… to _hope_.”

He had a surprised look on his face before it was overtaken with glee. “Ah… That’s all I ever wished to be… A stepping stone for hope!”

I rolled my eyes, lightly slapping his right cheek. “You’re more than that. You’re so much more and I’m never going to give up, until you see that as well.”

“R-Rin-chan…”

“Yes, Komaeda-kun?”

“I want to kiss you, again…” he mumbled, eyes already on my lips.

And so, we made out for the rest of the movie, completely missing the ending.

This turned out to be a wonderful first date, after all, but Komaeda didn’t want anyone to know about our relationship. In fact, he wanted me to completely stay away from him in public because he didn’t want me to be caught up in the hate he was receiving.

I refused.

We weren’t going to be blatantly displaying our affection to them, but if I wanted a kiss here and there or hand holding, I was going to have it. Besides, I wanted him to know that he wasn’t alone. I was always going to be by his side even if his side only consisted of him and me.


	6. Chapter 6

When we left the cinema, Hinata was talking to Monokuma and looking at the display of small items off to the side.

“Oh, how was the movie?” Hinata asked, looking up from his decision.

“Ugh…” Komaeda groaned. “It was terrible.”

“That is harsh,” Monokuma huffed. “Good films do get a lot of criticism, though, so I’ll let it pass this time. Hinata-kun here decided to pay me 1.5 million dollars not to watch it!”

“What? We had an option?” he gasped. “I would’ve paid that in a heartbeat!”

I raised an eyebrow at him. We were never forced to watch it. It was just something to do – somewhere to go to for our first… date…

Just thinking about it again made me all flustered. I couldn’t believe that that actually happened. What a whirlwind of a journey – short and tumultuous, but also sweet and endearing. Most of that described Komaeda perfectly. 

“Hey! I never forced you to watch it!” Monokuma continued to fume. “So ungrateful… I bet all you did was make kissy faces at each other. Yuck!”

Hinata’s eyebrows immediately rose in shock. 

With a shake of my head, I took both Komaeda’s and Hinata’s hands and began to drag them away from the theatre before this conversation could become anymore strange. “Time to go!”

I could hear them talk about the movie behind me. Hinata was curious about what the plotline was and how it could become the next murder motive because somehow, that horrid waste of time was most definitely going to be Monokuma’s attempt at gas-lighting the situation.

But to be honest, the movie was so far-fetched and lack any sort of inspiration. 

“Let’s forget about the movie and – “

“Hiii~!” Mioda suddenly jumped in front of me. “How is everyone doing?”

And just like that, Mioda monopolized the rest of our evening. She was a radiant ball of energy.

By the end of the night, I was exhausted, both physically and mentally. 

I pulled Komaeda into my cottage and we both collapsed on to the bed where he began to laugh. “This is amazing… Absolutely fantastic!”

“Hm?” I tiredly turned to face him.

Komaeda also turned towards me. “I can’t believe how fortunate I am.”

I brushed his messy, snowy hair back when it fell in front of his face. “I’m so happy that you’re happy.”

He deserved it after all the bad that happened to him.

A hand pulled me up against his body. 

Were we moving too fast?

Typically, I would say ‘yes,’ but considering the situation where we could be murdered at any moment, perhaps we should just stop second guessing everything. Do everything as if it’s the last day on earth.

His lips descended upon mine and I was lost to him once more. Komaeda Nagito… I really, really liked him. I never wanted to let him go and I refused to allow anyone to hurt him, again.

“K-Komaeda-kun!” I gasped.

He nipped at my bottom lip before making his way down my neck. His warm breath sent shivers down my spine and I could feel the heat gather between my legs. 

I wanted him more than I ever wanted anyone in my life. “Please…” I moaned, buckling my hips. I could just picture him as I did in my dream… He was so close…

His breath caught when I brushed the bulge within in jeans. “Hah… Rin-chan… If you do that, I won’t be able to control myself.” He burned his face against my neck as we panted with need, but still too nervous to go any further.

“I really like you, Rin-chan,” he sighed, hugging me as if I was a teddy bear. “I’m such a selfish person… I want to hold you like this forever.”

I hummed, nuzzling his chest. 

That was fine. 

We seemed to be in accordance.

The next day, Mioda found us again. She was about to bounce her way into outer space with how excited she looked. “Hey! Hey! There’s going to be a festival tonight! Wear yukataaas~!”

With that, she ran off to tell Tanaka and his Four Dark Devas of Destruction.

“Yukatas? Let’s go to the market before all the nice ones are gone!” I ran to the building to find Sonia and Souda already there. Souda was blatantly staring at the princess who was paying no attention to him.

I looked at the selection they had, while Komaeda stood off to the side. “Come here!” I beckoned, frowning at him. “You have to wear one, too!”

“Oh, no.” He placed his hands in front of him, shaking his head. “I won’t look good in them and they seem to be made with such nice material. I’m not worth of – “

“Here! Try this one!” I shoved a greenish-grey one at him. It was almost the exact same shade of his eyes. “Go!” I pushed him into the fitting room before going back to looking for my own perfect yukata.

“Hm… I can’t decide which one I want…” Sonia mumbled.

“You’ll look good in any of them, Miss Sonia.” Souda stuck his tongue out as if he was a dog in heat.

“Rin-san, which one should I wear?” She turned to ask me as if the mechanic hadn’t spoken at all.

I looked at the two in her hands. There was a pale pink one with yellow flowers and a teal one with red flowers. They would both look amazing on her regal form, but I ended up pointing at the pink one.

She nodded. “I thought so, too! I’m glad you confirmed my decision. Do you need help with choosing yours?”

I hummed, looking uncertainly at all the choices. Why were there even so many in here?

“Why don’t you try on a few different ones?” she suggested. Excited, she began to pile them in Souda’s arms and he was more than happy to help his unrequited crush. I felt bad for him.

When Souda was nearly buried, Komaeda came stumbling out. His obi was wound around one leg and nearly took him down.

Sonia giggled, while I managed to stifle it. “Let me help you,” I offered, taking the silky material and carefully wrapped it around his waist before tying the black fabric into a bow. His waist was so narrow… He looked really pretty in the yukata.

“Thank you, Rin-chan.” He smiled, blushing attractively back at me.

I wanted to kiss him silly, but that would mean blowing our secret and I figured that I should at least respect his wishes for a couple of days. “No problem. Stay here. I’m going to try these on. Please help me choose one and be honest about it!”

I heaved the five yukatas away from Souda with a bright ‘thank you,’ causing him to turn red and stutter a reply.

I tried on a red one first, but even before seeing myself in the mirror, I knew that this was completely the wrong colour for me. It blended in with my hair and I became a red, moving blob, so I quickly changed out of it and put on the black one with red flowers.

It reminded me of Pekoyama…

“No, that’s not the right colour for you,” Sonia commented, shaking her head.

“But Rin-chan still looks cute,” Komaeda added.

I quickly turned around to change to the next one. It was a soft green, similar to Komaeda’s, but a little more on the pastel side. The soft pink flowers were concentrated at the bottom and scattered loosely around my waist.

Stepping out, I could see Sonia’s eyes light up. “That’s the one! You need not try anymore! What do _you_ think, Nagito-san?”

From the expression on her face, I had a feeling that she already knew there was something between us.

It didn’t help that Komaeda was drooling with a blush on his pale cheek. ‘So perfect… The epitome of hope – my hope…”

“A-Ah!” blood rushed up to my face. “Th-Thank you. I’m glad you l-like it!” This was so embarrassing! Why did he have to say something like that?

Sonia giggled again and gently pushed me towards Komaeda as she walked gracefully into the change room.

“I won’t ever forget this image of you.” He brushed my hair over my shoulders. “Whenever I’m sad or feel the edges of despair, I will remember this moment to remind me of hope.”

“Ugh… Can you guys _not_!” Souda shouted. “Leave so I can spend some… quality time with Miss Sonia!”

Since there was no reason to stay, we told her we were leaving and left them alone. They were pretty cute together, but I had also seen the way Tanaka had been casting subtle glances her way. She had done the same to him. There seemed to be something there and poor Souda was left out, being the eager third wheel.

We went over to the clearing where Nidai and Owari were carrying tables out, while Tsumiki and Nanami set them up.

“Is this really alright?” I whispered, feeling the breeze play with my long locks as I began to question this happiness that was swelling inside me. It seemed so wrong when death was always right around the corner.

“Hm?”

“Do you think we’ll be okay? The last time we had a party, someone died.” Happy events shouldn’t end in tragedy.

“Ah…” He looked down, guiltily, at the shifting grass. “Don’t worry. I won’t be interfering with anything. I just want to spent time with you.”

I shook my head. “That’s not what I meant. I’m not worried about that you’ll do something. You promised me, so I know you’ll keep it, but everyone else…”

“Don’t worry.” He leaned in with a smile on his face. “You’ll be safe and as long as you’re safe, nothing else matters.”

We found a seat beneath a tree and relaxed against the trunk. It almost seemed as if we weren’t in a Killing Game, right now. A normal day… Who knew we could still have these?

“Hinata-kun!” Komaeda waved the brunet over. He had a simple blue yukata on.

Hinata stood in front of us. “Hey. Uh… I don’t want to interrupt you guys, so I’ll just – “

Komaeda pulled the boy down beside him. “Sit. Enjoy! Fell the hope that will fill you!”

“Huh?” Hinata glanced over to me in confusion, but I merely shrugged and smiled back.

It was best just to enjoy Komaeda’s company when he was happy and amiable. There is no use trying to decipher what each other his words were supposed to mean. I was happy to accept him as he was.

“How have you been, Hinata-san?” I asked.

He rubbed the back of his neck. “As good as I could be, I guess. I think this is a good time to try to bring morale up.”

I nodded.

Only nine days in and four people were already dead. It was as if life on this island was constantly on fast forward. 

_I’ve only known him for **nine days**_.

It felt much longer. Why did it feel like it’s been longer?

“Are you two…?” Hinata looked awkwardly at us.

“Ahahahaha!” Komaeda let out a wheezing laugh. “I guess we’re not very good at hiding it, huh?”

No, Komaeda was not subtle at all, but I really didn’t mind. His affection was overwhelming in the best way possible. Never had I ever had the chance to forget about my unfortunate Ultimate. Maybe he really _did_ cancel my bad luck because despite people dying around me, I was strangely happier than ever. 

I laid my head on the side of his arm. Hinata looked even more uncomfortable now, so I reached over to place my hand on his. “Hey, don’t look so sad. Live today with all the hope in the world that we would be able to see tomorrow.”

Komaeda laughed. “Yes… Hope…” He wrapped his arms around us, our cheeks squished against his chest. “We must all shine with hope. That is hope we will win this Killing Game.”

Hajime’s face was flushed as he tried to squirm away. “K-Komaeda!”

“Ne, Hinata-kun…” The brunet looked over to me as I smiled. Our faces were a mere inch apart. “Komaeda gives nice hugs, doesn’t he?”

Hinata looked away, his face even redder than before. He didn’t admit nor deny my question, so I had a feeling that our relationship may have just gotten more complicated. I wasn’t sure if this was good or bad, yet.

When Komaeda finally loosened his grip, I could see how truly happy he looked. I stayed in his arms, while Hinata walked away only to return with a large plate of food for us to share.

“Uwa~! So cute! Ibuki ships!” The musician pointed at us before snapping a dozen photos. “Look! Look!” After she flashed through all the photos to us, she promptly showed it to everyone else.

“Ah… I guess the cat is really out of the bag, isn’t it?” Komaeda laughed, not looking worried at all. In fact, he looked delighted that everyone knew.

What a strange man…

He had been the one who wanted to keep it a secret, but I really shouldn’t be surprised. He was very hard to predict.

After eating, we laid down on the grass. I had my head on his chest as they conversed. His hand stroked my hair, until my eyes drooped. It felt so good.

“Rin-chan… Rin-chan…” His voice poked through my drowsiness. “The fireworks are about to begin.”

My eyes fluttered open and as I tilted my head to look at him, a kiss fell on my lips. 

Mm…

I slowly sat up to see Hinata by the shore line, about to light the fireworks. Everyone was sitting on the grass, watching.

_*Bang!*_

Red showered down the sky, followed by yellow, blue, and green. The fireworks kept going. The explosive sound made my heart race, fuelling the adrenaline and glee.

I laughed, clapping my hands before Komaeda turned me to face him. His pale face was the perfect canvas for the magical light display. 

“I’m going to kiss you now, Rin-chan,” he breathed before pressing his lips against mine. His tongue ran across my bottom lip, asking for entrance, which I happily gave.

I buried my fingers into his fluffy hair, fully focused on him and nothing else.

I felt so happy… so lucky…

I loved him.

He pulled me into his lap, never once breaking contact. As I wrapped my legs around his waist, I could feel his bulge rubbing against me. “Ha… K-Komaeda-kun!”

“Rin-chan… If we don’t stop soon…” He broke away, panting, but his arms remained around me. “I don’t want anyone else to see you naked. Is that too selfish of me? Trash like myself does not deserve such beauty… But I want it all. I need you, Rin-chan.”

His words made my heart race and my toes curl. I subconsciously squeezed my legs tighter around his narrow waist. “Y-You’re right… Not here. I don’t want people to see. And... And… I wouldn’t want m-my first time to be like this. I’m not sure if… if I’m even ready…”

I looked down in embarrassment.

“That’s fine. We can be each other’s firsts when you’re ready,” he promised, stroking my cheek with his thumb.

We enjoyed the rest of the show and thanked Hinata for his hard work. Everyone surrounded him as if he was a hero and perhaps he was. The firework display lightened our moods and we were able to think back on happier memories together.

“Shall we return to our cottage?”

Our… cottage…?

I blushed. “Y-Yes.” I was glad he was going to stay with me again. I always felt safe with him.

…

The next day, everyone was visibly more relaxed and happy. The chatter was louder, until suddenly, Kuzuryu burst into the restaurant. He looked to be in pain, both physically and emotionally.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what happened,” he blurted out. “It… I never wanted… I saw what happened in the game, but it was not my place to seek revenge, especially at a time like this. I was weak, but Peko…” Unshed tears welled up in his eyes. “I won’t give myself anymore excuses. I was in the wrong and I beg for your forgiveness.”

“I will never forgive you!” Saionji shouted at him. “Mahiru-chan didn’t deserve to die! I hate you! I hate you!”

Kuzuryu turned away from the hate.

I felt bad for them both. This Killing Game was bringing out the worst in us. There was no one to be blamed, except Monokuma and whoever that was behind the devious bear.

All of a sudden, the yakuza collapsed on to the floor with blood pooling beneath him.

“Kuzuryu!”

He had sliced his own stomach as a form of self-punishment. Who had even allowed him to have a knife?!

Instead of staying down, he picked himself back up, but everyone urged him to accept treatment from Tsumiki who was panicking. The poor girl was intelligent, but she was an absolute nervous wreck all the time and I sometimes wondered how she could process anything she was doing, especially when it could mean like or death for someone.

“Hey! Hey!” Mioda waved her arms around once we left the hospital. “You know… We have a music band and Ibuki thinks we should throw a party for the baby yakuza at the Titty Typhoon!”

Everyone was on board with it, except Saionji who had retreated into her cottage.

“This is going to be great!” I cheered, shedding my blouse without even thinking and started looking for something to wear. I didn’t have many options, but –

Komaeda was suddenly pressed against my back and I finally realised that I had stripped in front of him. “So mean… You can’t do this to me, Rin-chan. I can’t guarantee that I’ll be able to control myself.”

His hot breath was on my neck and his hands began to wander up and down my body. When his thumb slid beneath my bra and rubbed against one quickly hardening nipple. I jerked and he immediately jumped away.

“Ah! Sorry… I shouldn’t have taken such liberty…” he apologised, looking as if he was about to run away.

I was lightly panting as I tried to comprehend what I was feeling. “N-No… I – I – I just…” I grabbed the first thing I saw and tossed it on. “It felt good, Komaeda-kun. I’m just s-scared.”

He wrapped his arms around me, once more. “I’ll try not to push any further, until you’re ready. Seeing you like that just made me…”

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking…” It was my fault, too. 

He smiled cryptically back at me.

Our relationship was still new and there was a lot of sexual tension. If anyone was going to take my virginity, I wanted Komaeda to do it. There was just something holding me back. I didn’t know whether it was too early into our relationship or if it was another reason, but I just wasn’t ready and I was glad he respected that.

…

_Ah… He was never going to forget the sight. When her shirt came off, it took everything in his power not to pounce on her._

_She was so cruel…_

_How was he to walk with the problem between his legs, now?_

_When she turned away, he covered his mouth with his hand to stifle the gleeful giggles that were trying to burst out of his body._

_His luck was just amazing! For him to be accepted by Rin-chan… His beacon of hope…_

_Slowly, his eyes darkened as he continued to stare at the back of her nervously fidgeting form._

_His luck cycle…_

_With such fortune, he was bound to encounter misfortune. He just didn’t know when or how bad it was going to be._

_If he wasn’t so selfish, he’d let her go now before it hurt - or worse, kill her – like it didn’t with everyone else close to him. Sewage waste like him truly did not deserve any good. It’ll all crumble in his hands._

_But he **was** selfish. _

_He really wanted Rin-chan._

_He needed Rin-chan like he had never needed anything else._

_She was the air he breathed._

_The force that kept his heart beating._

_The hope that drowned away all of his despair._


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

By sunset, Kuzuryu, with the help of Tsumiki, was able to leave the hospital and it was time to celebrations.

I was excitedly waiting for the music to start. Mioda had set up everything herself and it was looking fantastic. Different coloured spotlights were flashing everywhere and there were tables of drinks and snacks. We were all hyped up for the music when suddenly…

Mioda opened her mouth and the blaring music was nothing I could’ve possibly prepared for. Instead of something peppy and bright like her personality, what came out was something akin to death metal. 

It wasn’t… terrible per say. Just not my kind of music and it seemed that everyone else was in accordance.

I took several step backs from the pure force of the noise and bumped into Komaeda who had a grimace on his face. He was trying to say something, but I couldn’t hear anything, except for Mioda’s music. I could already feel a headache forming with all the pressure pressing against me.

When it was finally over, I let out a sigh of relief.

“That was dreadful…” Komaeda groaned, rubbing his temples.

“Don’t let her hear you say that,” I mumbled. “She means well…”

“That was great, Ibuki-chan!” Saionji gushed, throwing her arms up.

It seemed that the dancer had decided to join on Kuzuryu’s party after all. That was a good sign, right?

The yakuza looked happier even though Saionji refused to forgive him. Being around people seemed to have cheered him up some, especially when they all freely accepted him with open arms. 

Well… This day was turning out to be pretty good, after all.

“Is everyone ready for Ibuki’s next song?!” she shouted into the microphone.

Thankfully, we were saved by the small form bursting into the auditorium.

“H-Help! Help!” Monomi came running, clearly in distress.

“Huh? What is it, Monomi?” Hinata asked, going up to the panicking bunny.

Monomi frantically waved her nubbly arms. “It’s a disaster! You must follow me quickly!”

“What’s a disaster?” Sonia asked.

“Owari-san is in danger! Big danger!”

That was all it took for us to go running after her.

We stopped at a clearing where Owari seemed to be fighting Monokuma. She was in bad shape, while the bear didn’t have a single scratch on him. When he took out a rocket launcher, I thought that that was it, but a large form ran pass us from behind and stepped in front of her.

“Nidai!”

I gasped, looking away. Did Monokuma really just kill someone? If he could kill anyone at any time, then were we all doomed from the start? Why did I still hold an ounce of hope that the fiend would play fair?

“Help! Please, save him!” Owari screamed, holding Nidai close to her chest.

“Save him, Monokuma! You broke the rules!” Monomi shouted. “You’re not allowed to harm any of the students! Bad!”

Luckily, Monokuma caved in and took Nidai on to an ambulance that was identical to the one that drove Kuzuryu to the hospital.

“Do you think he’ll be alright?” I whispered. We had only gotten Kuzuryu back this evening – just several hours ago. Why did it have to end this way, again?

“If anyone could help him, it’d be Monokuma,” Hinata sighed. “The bear might be bad, but look at Kuzuryu. He only lost an eye, but otherwise, he’s fine.”

I nodded, sadly.

All the good feelings were blown away. Death was right around the corner, again.

We skipped dinner that day, too depressed to eat. Even Owari wasn’t in the mood and that was saying a lot. She was typically ready to eat anything and everything in sight.

I knew she was close to Nidai and if he were to die like that, she would never be able to forgive herself.

“Komaeda-kun, stay with me tonight?” I asked.

He smiled. “Of course. I deserve at least that much, don’t I?”

I sighed, tugging him into our cottage. “Just come in and stop saying weird things.”

The next morning, Owari was still crying her eyes out. Tears streamed down her face as she despaired for Nidai. As expected, she was blaming herself and wouldn’t listen to anything anyone was saying. “I can’t do this anymore! I’m so scared!”

“I hope he dies,” Komaeda suddenly blurted out.

Owari cried harder at his words.

Why would he randomly say something so heartless and insensitive at a time like this? In fact, I couldn’t imagine him saying that at all. In fact, he had been behaving even odder than usual all through last night and I didn’t think that was possible.

“You want me to tie you up again, asshole?!” Souda threatened with his fist ready to strike.

“This world is so full of despair! Why even bother trying? And you!” Komaeda pointed to the yakuza. “You’re not even the real Kuzuryu! You’re a clone! Monokuma is going to clone Nidai, too!” He tossed his head back and let out a chilling laugh.

“Am I also a clone?” Mioda suddenly asked. 

“K-Komaeda-kun, are you okay? Why are you saying all this?” He wasn’t making any sense at all!

As I reached out to touch him, he quickly seized my wrist. His palm was uncomfortably hot. Did he have a fever? There was something definitely wrong with him!

“You…” he breathed. “I hate you so much. You’re always in my way when all I ever want is for you to leave me alone! I never want to see your ugly face, again!”

My eyes widened as tears immediately sprung out from my eyes. “Why…?” Was that really how he thought of me? All the time we spent together… Had it only been another one of his games? Ws the scheming bastard from the first class trial the real him?!

I tried to tug my hand away, but he refused to let go.

“Hey! What’s wrong with you, Komaeda?!” Hinata growled.

“Ah! Hinata-kun… You should go die – a talentless, worthless scum like you! You don’t even deserve to be standing before me!” Komaeda declared.

“Why you - !” Tanaka had to hold Souda back as the mechanic tried to charge at the Ultimate Lucky Student.

“Komaeda-kun, w-why are you saying th-this?” I continued to struggle again him. “If you really hate me so much, then why don’t you just let me go?”

“Because I really _do_ hate you,” he hissed, his grip tightened. “If there as an option to never have to see you again, I would take it. I’d pay three hundred million dollars to make sure of it!”

Even so, he wouldn’t let me leave. Was he truly so cruel to keep me here just so I couldn’t escape his venomous words?

“Rin-chan should leave Nagito-chan alone because that’s what he wants,” Mioda spouted out.

How was everyone suddenly behaving like lunatics?!

“Mioda-san, what are you saying?” Sonia, too, was concerned.

The Ultimate Musician would never say something like that in such a bland tone. Everyone knew how she shipped us together. For this abrupt change, there just _had_ to be something wrong!

“Puhuhuhuhuhu!” Monokuma decided to pay us a visit. “It seems that these three have been infected by the Despair Disease!”

We were all confused, so he elaborated.

“Yes. Owari is infected with the Coward Disease. Mioda is infected with the Gullible Disease. Komaeda is infected with the Liar Disease,” he informed us, laughing at the chaos that was being caused by this.

I looked down at Komaeda’s hand. Was that why he was so hot? “Komaeda-kun…”

“Despair! Despair! Oh, such wonderful despair! Everyone must feel what I am feeling! Such beauty… I – I… I…” His hand went slack around my wrist before he collapsed on to the floor. His face was flushed and he was breathing heavily.

“Komaeda-kun!” I dropped down on to my knees beside him. “Don’t leave them like this! Please, help them, Monokuma!”

The bear merely laughed. “Sorry, you’re on your own this time, but be careful, the Despair Disease is contagious!” With that, he was gone as quickly as he came.

“Tsumiki-san, you’re the Ultimate Nurse. You can help them, right?” I begged her. “We’ll take them to the hospital and you can treat them. I – I’ll stay with you! I’ll do anything you ask. _Please_!”

I couldn’t lose him, not when I just found the only shred of happiness in my life. To live life as I did before… I wouldn’t be able to bear it!

The nurse nodded. Hinata helped me with Komaeda, while Souda had Owari and Kuzuryu with Mioda.

Once we reached the hospital, the others refused to get any closer because they didn’t want to get infected as well. It was probably for the best because an island of maniac was the last thing we all needed. They decided to stay at the nearby motel instead of going all the way back to the cottages.

Hinata, Tsumiki, Kuzuryu, Souda, and I stayed with the infected and I was left in charge with changing Komaeda into a hospital gown because no one else seemed to want to do it. I kept his boxers on and quickly draped the loose fabric around him, tying the thin string at the back.

There was a gentle knock on the door before Hinata walked in. “Do you need any help?”

“I… I…” I _needed_ help, but perhaps nothing that he could provide. There were no magic words that could bring Komaeda out of this. No all-cure potion.

He knelt down beside me and pulled me into a hug and that was when the tears returned anew. I was so used to Komaeda always being around when I was on the edge of despair. He always seemed to know what to say or do to bring me out of it.

“He’s going to be fine. He has someone to live for, so I know – I’m certain – that he will pull through,” he whispered. “Besides, he’s the luckiest person I know. He’s not going to die.”

“But what if my unluckiness finally catches up to me?” I feared. It was bound to happen, right? I can’t hold on to happiness, not when this curse kept interfering with everything. “I can’t lose him…”

“You won’t.” The firmness in his voice actually made me start to believe him. “He’s not going to leave you.”

I stayed in his arms for a little while longer before looking back to Komaeda who was panting softly. Pulling away from Hinata, I changed the towel on Komaeda’s forehead. His high fever wasn’t getting any better and the towels weren’t as effective as I’d like, so I asked Hinata to go on a run for ice cubes.

“H-How is his temperature?” Tsumiki quietly asked when she walked in.

I shook my head. “He’s at 40.2°C. I – I don’t know what to do. He’s absolutely delirious!”

She placed her hand over her mouth. “Oh, n-no…” She leaned over him and took his vitals. They were just as expected. He wasn’t doing well. “If he d-doesn’t get b-b-better soon, he m-might d-d-d-die!”

I let out a squeak as I tried to suppress a sob. I had already cried enough and my eyes were bloodshot.

“Hey, Tsumiki. I think Owari might need a bit of help.” Hinata came back with a bowl of ice in his hand. “Saeki-san and I can take care of Komaeda.”

“O-Okay!” She quickly scurried off.

“We’ll nurse him back to health. I know we can do it. Here…” He extended the bowl towards me.

With trembling hands, I took a piece and began to gently run it down Komaeda’s arm and bare chest.

“D-Didn’t I tell you to l-leave me alone?” Komaeda mumbled, his eyes opened just a sliver. “Despair… Despair… Leave me with my Despair! Despair makes m-me feel g-great…”

Hinata walked up from behind me and ran ice cubs along Komaeda’s legs. “Don’t lose hope. You know he wouldn’t like that. You’re his beacon of light, remember?”

I wiped my eyes before nodding. “You’re right. He’s going to be okay because I refuse to let him die. I will kick his sorry butt when this is all over! How dare he make me worry like this/”

He chuckled. “Exactly! And I’ll help you!”

We worked tirelessly, trying to keep Komaeda’s temperature down. It was a struggling battle and the best we could do was preventing it from rising. In the end, we dozed off beside each other on the floor.

_“Ne, Rin-chan,” he whispered. “Stop being so stubborn. I really have a problem.”_

_I flushed, pushing him gently away from me. “Komaeda-kun, I told you not yet! I-I’m not ready!”_

_He pouted, plopping on to the floor. “I know… It’s really hard for me to be so close to you and not touch you like I want to. I guess I’ll have to wait longer before my luck kicks in, huh?”_

_I laughed. “Don’t worry. You **will** get luck. Just not today.”_

_With a smile, he managed to pull me into his lap. “Can I kiss you, then? I really want to kiss you.”_

_I nodded, leaning in to press our lips together.”_

A hand in my hair woke me up and I looked up from my bowed over position by the bed to see Komaeda gazing down at me.

“Komaeda-kun!” I gasped, trying to get up, but he tightened his grip. “Ow! That h-hurts. Let go!”

v“Leave me alone. I hate you. Stop hanging around me all the time.” His green eyes darkened, but contrary to his words, he yanked me up for a hot, wet kiss. The heat went straight down my body as I moved with him. “You’re so ugly. You make me fall into Despair.” He licked my lips. “You’re so stupid and useless. No one could ever love you.”

His other hand tugged at the buttons of my blouse and that was when I tried to pull away. It took several attempts, but his grip eventually slackened and his eyes drooped shut. 

He was unconscious, again.

When I turned around, I noticed that Hinata had woken up and was staring back at me with a dark blush on his face.

“Ah! I’m s-sorry you had to watch that!” I stuttered, feeling my face heat up to the point where it was difficult to think. All the blood had rushed to my head.

vThat was so embarrassing! What did Hinata think of me, now? No, I couldn’t feel that way. It was perfectly fine for me to kiss my… my…

Who was Komaeda to me? Was he my boyfriend? I couldn’t recall a time where we actually talked about it and now, he…

“No, I’m sorry. I should’ve given you some privacy.” As he looked away, he seemed conflicted. “Do you want me to…?”

I shook my head. “Please, stay. I’d really appreciate the company.”

A relieved look appeared on his face. “Okay. How is he?”

“Same as before.”

We repeated the day before, caught between trying to keep Komaeda’s temperature down and not going stir crazy. It was stressful.

Eventually, Hinata volunteered to go down to the cafeteria to grab us some food and also check on Souda who was working on the security cameras.

I could hear people walking by several times of the day, but no one came to visit Komaeda. There was only Hinata, Tsumiki, and me.

It annoyed me that no one else would even try to understand him. They all held the first class trial over his head. It wasn’t as if they didn’t have any reason at all to be cautious. He had taken the first step to start off the Killing Game, but… he hadn’t been the one to murder anyone. Teruteru made his own decisions.

His situation really wasn’t too different from what happened with Kuzuryu and they had accepted him with open arms almost instantly. If the yakuza deserved a second chance, then why not Komaeda?

And if the reason was because they thought he was crazy, then they could all go to Hell.

Everyone was a little crazy here. We couldn’t be anything else in a situation like this.

“Here.” Hinata returned, juggling two trays in his hands.

I quickly went over to help him. “Thank you, Hinata-kun. You don’t know how much I appreciate all that you’ve done.”

He smiled. “I’m glad to be of help. Sometimes, I feel pretty useless when I have to watch as my friends die. If I could do anything to stop it from happening, I would.”

Then again… Why did it even matter what others thought? Komaeda had Hinata and me. Friends were about quality, not quantity.

“I won’t be able to stay tonight. I have to help Souda with something, but I’ll still be in the hospital if you need anything.

“That’s fine. Thank you.” I stroked Komaeda’s hair as he fitfully slumbered.

The hours passed slowly. I checked his temperature every half hour and there have been no improvements. He was stay steadily at around forty degrees. No amount of ice and cold towers did the trick.

“I have to go now.” Hinata placed his hand on my shoulder.

I nodded tiredly at him. “Okay. Thank you, Hinata-kun. I’ll see you in the morning?”

“Yes, of course. Good night, Saeki-san.”

Time continued to crawl. Several times, I caught myself beginning to doze off, but quickly snapped back up to attention when Komaeda let out a tortured moan. 

I rested my head against the side of the mattress when a headache hit me. The lack of sleep and stress of seeing Komaeda like this was really getting to me, but I couldn’t afford to slack off. He could need me at any moment or perhaps I may have to retrieve Tsumiki if it got any worse.

Rubbing my eyes, I went over to the closet to grab a blanket and wrapped it around myself. Why was the room so cold? The window was closed. Maybe it was because Hinata wasn’t here anymore…

I sighed, trying to keep warm and decided to rest by his bed, once more, with an alarm by my side. This should keep me alert enough. I could check on him again in another half an hour.


	8. Chapter 8

_*Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.*_

My mind was fuzzy. What was wrong with me?

I tried to get to my feet, but ended up back on my butt as the world spun. It was difficult trying to gain any sort of purchase on anything.

The blanket around me was becoming stifling. I frantically shed the thick material, but it was not enough. My heart was racing and heat kept spreading through my body. I began to work on my blouse – hands trembling as they tried to work the holes to pop open each button.

So hot…

Why was it so hot…?

Wasn’t I just too cold a moment ago?

I touched my own forehead. It was kind of warm, but I wasn’t sure. Was my hand hot, too? It had to be if I was feeling hot all over.

I looked over to Komaeda and immediately found myself climbing on to the bed. With one knee on each side of his narrow waist, I hovered over him. When I touched his face, he didn’t feel so hot anymore, but was that because I was just as hot?

Any other time, I would’ve lingered more on the thought and even become startled by it, but right now, it seemed so insignificant, so brought my attention back to more important matters.

I ran my hand over his chest. I could practically feel his heart fluttering just beneath.

He was so pale…

So beautiful…

And he was all mine.

My Komaeda-kun.

My Nagito.

His eyes fluttered open, revealing hazy green eyes. “Rin-chan… Why are you on top of me? I hate seeing you face…” His hands made their way on to my hips as he held me in place.

“Komaeda-kun…” I sighed, rocking my hips as my body took control over my mind. “I need you. _Please_. Take me, Komaeda-kun. I’m so hot. I need you to take me. I’m going to go crazy if you don’t fuck me.”

He groaned, squeezing his eyes shut as I felt his bulge brow beneath me. “Get off me.”

His words continued to contradict his actions as he ground his hips upward to reciprocate my movements.

“K-Komaeda-kun!” I moaned.

It felt so good.

I knew he could make me feel good.

He gritted his teeth and seemed to be unsure of what he should do.

Giggling, I made quick work of his boxers and stared hungrily at the fine specimen twitching in front of me. “Ahh… Komaeda-kun, it’s so beautiful…” Drool ran down my chin as I scooted downward.

It looked so yummy…

I grinned coyly at him before giving the leaking slit a tiny kitten lick.

He gasped, arching his back. “R-Rin-chan!” He couldn’t figure out what to say, so he just grabbed my hair and brought my lips back on his cock.

I happily sucked him like a lollipop and stroked the rest where it wouldn’t fit. He tasted so good. Why hadn’t I done this sooner? How silly of me… He had offered. I should’ve taken it.

No matter, I had it now and I wasn’t planning on giving it away anytime soon.

“I want to hurt you,” he growled, guiding my head with his hand.

Up and down.

Up and down.

Letting his cock pop out of my mouth, I took a moment to reply, “Hurt me, Komaeda-kun. I want you to hurt me.”

His eyes darkened, until it was nearly black and suddenly, I was on my back with him looming over me. His snowy-white hair was messier than usual, slightly matte from the sweat of his fever.

I reached up to tuck a lock behind his ear. “Komaeda-kun…”

He tossed his head back and let out the most sinister laugh I had ever heard, the wheezing was more pronounced than usual. It was even worse than the one from the first trial. “Rin-chan… You’re so full of despair… It’s delicious. I’m going to consume you.”

With that said, he practically tore my skirt off as he hastily made to move on to somewhere more important. My plain panties were gone in a flash and he probed my entrance with his engorged member. It was so silky smooth and nearly purple in colour.

“A-Ah!” I needed him to be inside me and he was taking so long. “Now, Komaeda-kun! Take me! Make me yours!”

He licked his lips and with one powerful thrust, he was completely sheathed inside me. It didn’t hurt like I imagined it would. I thought my first time was going to be more painful, but I loved how it felt. I was already so wet that he slid in so easily… Was it because of how much I wanted him? 

I was so depraved…

All thoughts and uncertainties faded away when he began to move. He kept to his promise. There was pain, but there was also pleasure. His hands had my hips in a bruising grip as he manipulated my body however he pleased – pulling and pushing. He took what he wanted and I was more than happy to give him everything.

“Ha…! Yes! Use me, Komaeda-kun! Use me!” I begged with one hand gripping tightly to the pillow below me and the other on my breast. I was so sensitive everywhere. Every touch was a tiny explosion of pleasure, bringing me closer and closer to completion.

If what he was doing was filling me with despair, then I never wanted it to stop. I wanted all of it. I wanted all of Komaeda-kun’s despair!

He pulled me into a hard kiss that left me breathless and gasping for more. He swallowed each cry and nibbled on my bottom lip. 

So good…

He made me feel so good…

“Ah, Komaeda-kun!” I cried, meeting his every thrust, trying to push him deeper and deeper inside me. 

More…

More…

Was I ever going to have enough of him?

It seemed like an impossible pursuit.

He groaned, nibbling my ear. “Haha... Rin-chan… The Big Bad Wolf is going to put a baby into his Lil’ Red…”

“Yes!” I gasped. I wanted Komaeda-kun’s baby!

Hah… How adorable a tiny Komaeda-kun would look… I wanted many mini Komaeda-kuns!

He cackled. “Gonna fill you up with despair… So much despair…”

He quickened his pace as his movements grew more erratic. His heavy pants, warm on my face.

My eyes fluttered when the world suddenly exploded around me. It was unlike anything I had ever felt before. T he pleasure was mind-blowing and left me feeling weightless – floating on a cloud.

When he collapsed on top of me, I was still writhing beneath him and that was when the door opened.

We both turned to look at him at the same time.

“Ah! Hajime!” Komaeda greeted him, still panting with his cock buried deep within me, twitching as the last of his seeds spurted out.

“Huh?” His ahoge was standing straight up as he tried to comprehend what he was seeing. “ _W-W-WHAT?!”_

“Join us, Hinata-kun.” I extended my hand towards him, excited for the wonderful surprise. “Despair… It feels so good. Let us show you…”

“I – I don’t understand… You two…” Hinata looked as if he was about to have an aneurysm. Unable to handle the scene, he quickly turned on his heels and slammed the door shut behind him.

“He didn’t want to play.” I pouted. I really wanted Hinata to join. He was so nice and supportive. He stayed with me the entire time, while Komaeda was sick. I thought this would be a good chance to repay him. I really wanted to make him feel good, too…

Komaeda chuckled. “Ah… Hajime…”

With the short distraction gone, I returned my attention to the beautifully despairing angel above me.

“Komaeda-kun,” I whispered, pulling him down to nuzzle his neck. 

Even now, I wanted more of him and I could still feel he was half hard inside me. My walls clenched, lightly rousing him a little more. 

“Ngh…” he groaned, closing his eyes. “Rin-chan… Hah…” He was on the verge of another burst of laughter, but managed to keep it in, but his shoulders shook with the effort.

I clamped my legs tighter around him, pressing his body closer against mine. 

“I really hate you, Rin-chan,” he sighed, leaving a trail of wet kisses down the valley of my breasts before popping a hard nipple into his mouth. “To have someone like you in bed with me… So disgusting…”

His words did leave little tinges of hurt, but a part of me knew he didn’t mean them. His actions were speaking much louder than his words, so I gladly ignored them to fuel him on. “I’m sorry, Komaeda-kun. Rin-chan has been bad. Please, punish Rin-chan…”

He shuddered, his eyes a mixture of despair and delirium. His lips were spread into a wide grin of madness. “Punish, Rin-chan… Punish, Rin-chan…”

This time, he couldn’t keep the laughter in. It was booming – echoing. It bounced from wall to wall and sent shivers down my spine. 

He jerked his hip to slide out just enough to only keep the tip inside. “Rin-chan is so ugly… Rin-chan deserves to be punished…”

I gasped, eyes rolling back when he slammed back in. I was still sensitive from the last orgasm and with him hitting all the right spots, I was left screaming.

Release hit me fast and hard and it never stopped after that. It shook my entire body causing me to babble incoherently to him.

Drool trailed down the side of my face as his face swam in and out of focus.

He kept thrusting in and out of me; my name a heavy pant on his lips. 

“T-Too much…” I sobbed. I wanted more, yet my body was reaching its limit. I was going to break! “K-Komaeda-kun… I-I’m… Nnngh~!”

My back arched as I could no longer control anything I was doing. I was a prisoner to my own body, trapped in layers and layers of pain and pleasure. 

“Rin-chan… Rin-chan…”

I shook my head. No… 

I couldn’t…

No more…

But I wanted…

I kept wanting…

I was falling deeper and deeper into madness.

His madness.

His despair.

“Komaeda-kun!” 

My world blackened and I was gone.


	9. Chapter 9

He woke up feeling groggy, but his head was clearer than it had been for a while. 

For the past few days, it was as if he had gone in and out of consciousness and only recalled bits and pieces of what happened. He remembered the feeling of disgusting despair and was disappointed at himself for being so weak. How could he just cave in like that? What a piece of human trash…

He shifted his tired, aching body and noticed how his mattress was moving and letting out the most tantalizing mews.

“R-Rin-chan?” he whispered, not believing any of his senses. He was hearing things that weren’t there, seeing someone who couldn’t be here, touching someone who would never allow him to touch her like this!

This had to be a dream or hallucination. 

None of this could be real!

Again, he shifted and the moment he moved his pelvis, he let out a gasp as realisation hit him hard.

His member was encased in a nice, warm cocoon that was lightly squeezing him, teasing for more milk that he wasn’t sure if he still had. “Rin-chan…” He ran his hand through her hair before resting on her flushed cheek. “So beautiful…”

He let out a maniacal string of giggles as he nuzzled his face between her pale, bare breasts. All of his bad luck must’ve been for this one magnificent moment. The despair was completely gone as he was filled with such delicious, shining hope – the hope that was in the form of a rather short redhead girl who was still mewing like a kitten below him.

“K-Komaeda-kun?” she mumbled, her eyes slowly opened and her face split into a wanton smile. “Do you want more? I feel you inside me… It’s moving… It feels so good… Please put more baby making juice inside me, Komaeda-kun!”

He shuddered. The words were so depraved, but he wanted nothing more than to do as she asked. He also knew that he couldn’t take advantage of her when she was in this state. Her dark flush was most definitely not just from lust, it was from a fever – the same one that he had for the past few days.

It was his fault she was sick.

Again, he was the cause of misfortune…

“Please, Komaeda-kun, I need you…” She wiggled her lower body in an attempt to cause any form of friction to appease her desires.

With a sigh, he allowed himself to squish her with his weight. Her soft whines and moans were nearly enough to shatter his resolves. “Rin-chan is mean,” he mumbled. “Making me all hot and bothered… What am I supposed to do, now? I really, really want to make love to you.”

She looked hopefully back at him. “Then please, use me to satisfy your lust. Make me feel good, Komaeda-kun.”

How was he supposed to control himself when she was like this? This was clearly cheating! She was a cheater.

“Go back to sleep, Rin-chan,” he sighed.

“No!” she protested, pressing her lips against his in a very effective attempt to get him riled up.

He groaned, allowing himself to give in to this one little thing. They had kissed several times already, so surely, there was no harm in this. Just no more beyond it.

When it was over, he just held her until she fell back asleep.

It was only then that he could convince himself to slide out of her. Immediately, he missed being in her warmth, but it was for the best. His self-control was slowly being whittled away.

“You’re awake and uh…” Hinata had returned with an embarrassed look on his face. He refused to look at them, instead, opting to keep his gaze out the window. “Are you feeling better, now?”

Komaeda shifted Rin, until she was resting on top of his chest. “Yes, must better. Thanks for visiting us! I recall seeing you here with Rin-chan while I was sick. I guess I must’ve infected her with the Despair Disease. I’m glad I haven’t done the same to you. Sewage dump like me is really not good for anything but causing trouble for others…”

Hinata shook his head. “It’s not your fault. I’m sure Monokuma had something to do with this too. Tsumiki-san has also caught it. Hers was the Remembering Disease and it made her… It made her kill both Mioda and Saionji for her “beloved” – whatever that means.”

“Hm…” That was truly interesting. What kind of person was the Ultimate Nurse if regaining her memories turned her into a murdering maniac?

“How is she? We don’t have a nurse anymore and Monokuma refuses to help.”

That would just be his luck, wouldn’t it? Give him something good and then threaten to take it all away. He just had to keep hoping that Rin-chan wouldn’t end up like everyone else he cared for. She was the most precious person to him and losing her was not an option.

Hinata plopped down on to the armchair, rubbing his eyes. “I’m sorry I interrupted yesterday. I was coming here to get you guys for the class trial, but since you were both sick, Monokuma allowed an exception for your absences. 

“I see…” Komaeda looked down at the slumbering girl who was quietly dozing on top of him. “I’m sure neither of us would’ve minded yesterday. Now? Well… Why don’t you come here and fine out, Hajime-kun?” He smiled teasingly at the brunet.

“Huh?!” The poor boy looked about ready to melt into a puddle of goo. “D-Don’t joke about something like that!”

“Who said I was joking?” he chuckled, enjoying the way the other male was in distress.

An hour later, she stirred, again. He was interrupted from his reading when her hand wandered downward to grip him firmly. He instinctively buckled his hips and clenched his eyes shut.

No…

He couldn’t allow this.

This was wrong.

Rin-chan was not in her right mind and therefore could not consent, so he shouldn’t –

“Komaeda-kun…” 

He felt something wet hit his nipple and let out a tortured gasp. His eyes snapped back open to see her drooling above him.

“N-No, Rin-chan…” he squeaked.

He wasn’t exactly sure what the denial was for – whether to tell her to stop or that he could no longer hold himself back.

She went up for a kiss first. Her hand stroking him in a way that made him gasp in pleasure.

Hinata started noticing something strange and looked at them with a frown on his face. “Komaeda…”

“I want to ask for your help to stop her, but if I really wanted to, I could’ve done it myself.” Komaeda’s hand was already roaming up and down her body, enjoying the soft curves beneath his hands. “You don’t understand how good she feels,” he groaned as she straddled his hips and slid him into her.

Her hot heat was clamped so decadently around him.

From then on, his mind was hazy with lust.

What was she going to think of him when she realised that he had practically raped her while she was sick? It was only right if she shouted at him and demanded he never touch or even see her again. He was even lower than trash.

But he really didn’t want to think about it right now. Everything felt too good.

She began to bounce on top of him, moaning and mewing.

Oh, how she was driving him mad…

“Hinata-kun…” He reached out a hand towards the brunet who was still trying his best to ignore what was happening, but also decided to stay in the room, this time.

Komaeda knew Hinata had some sort of feelings for them. There could be no other explanation as to why he was still here, secretly watching them fuck. Hinata-kun was a closet pervert…

He threw his head back, laughing at the turn of events. How fun… This game had turned out so much better than he could have ever hoped for.

“Why are you - ?!” Hinata gritted his teeth. Was Komaeda still sick? No, this was the real Komaeda Nagito – unhinged and a terrible amalgamation of hope and despair.

Hinata really didn’t know what he was feeling, but he couldn’t deny the attraction he had for them. The pair was like two sides of the same coin. They were broken angels scrambling to stay afloat while grasping at anything to remain sane.

“Ne, Hinata-kun… Kiss me… Rin-chan wants Hinata-kun’s kiss.” She flung her head back to look at him with crazed, lust-filled eyes. Her long, red hair tumbled down her pale back and her bare breasts were on full display for him.

Komaeda smiled at him. “Are you really going to say no to such a cute face, Hinata-kun?”

Her eyes grew wider and her tongue stuck out with drool dripping down the corner of her lips. “Ha… Hajimeee~!”

His feet carried him half way across the room before he stopped himself. “No, this is wrong. She is sick and I won’t take advantage of that!”

“As expected from an Ultimate… Very well, I shall allow you to do as you wish,” the snowy boy replied, bringing her back against his chest. ‘You are a much better man than me, but that much was obvious from the start. I am the trash that longs to be used.” He kissed the crown of her head with a content sigh.

At this moment, he was the happiest he had ever been. Rin-chan was riding him as if he was the most important thing in her life and that was the highest compliment she could ever pay to someone so despicably worthless. Even if this was caused by the Despair Disease… He found it impossible to deny her any further. He craved everything that she was willing to give him as if she was the oxygen that was keeping him alive.

To avoid giving into temptation, Hinata had to leave the room again. He was fine, until they wanted him to join them. Of course, he wanted to. If this was any normal situation, he would’ve been elated at the invitation. As it was, he had to stop it here before it got any further. 

It was different from her and Komaeda. They already had an existing relationship. He was only the third wheel, hoping for any second of their attention.

He was really no better than what Komaeda always described himself…

He was trash…

As luck would have it, leaving may have been a mistake. Just hours after, he learned that Rin’s condition had taken a turn for the worse and she fell into a coma that left the group speechless. What were they to do? Tsumiki was dead and no one else knew much about nursing.

Komaeda had become a completely wreck, blaming himself for all that had gone wrong. His faded green eyes were clouded with self-hatred and Hinata wanted nothing more than to place the blame on him because he needed someone to be angry at, but that wouldn’t be fair. It wasn’t Komaeda’s fault. The only one they could truly blame was Monokuma and whoever that was behind the devious bear.

Hinata spent long hours by her side, wiping her flushed face with a wet towel, similar to how they had taken care of Komaeda a short day ago.

“Why did this have to happen?” he whispered.

Her condition was similar to Komaeda’s lowest point where he was on the brink of death. The Ultimate Lucky student managed to pull through, but… could the Ultimate Unlucky student do the same?

“It’s my fault…” Komaeda mumbled as he looked at his hands. “I remember kissing her. That must’ve been when I infected her with the Despair Disease and I wasn’t helping matters by letting her… I should’ve known better… “

Hinata sighed. “No, you can’t blame yourself for this. You were out of your mind at the time. You can’t be held responsible for your actions when you were also on the edge of death. Even now, you’re not fully recovered, yet. Your fever isn’t as high, but you still have a low temperature on you.”

Komaeda didn’t seem to be too convinced, but didn’t both with disputing the statements. He was drowning in guilt, so Hinata walked over to him after dropping the towel into the bowl of water.

“Don’t. Just stop it,” he snapped, tempted to slap the other boy. “Rin needs you, right now, and all you do is talk about yourself!” His words were harsh, but necessary. The words were meant not only for the white-haired boy, but also for himself. They were both slowly falling into despair, reprimanding themselves for something that neither could control.

Wide, hopefully eyes locked on his.

Komaeda Nagito…

“Ah ha… K-Koma… a…” she let out a soft moan, reaching blindly in her dreams.

…

I groaned, wondering if something had run over me because every part of my body was in pain. What caused this?

The last thing I remembered was tending to a very sick Komaeda and then, I had this terrible headache before everything became a feverish blur. I couldn’t seem to make sense of anything in between. It was as if I had been dreaming with only several, short vivid moments.

I had dreamt of being with Komaeda again. I felt like such a pervert. If he ever found out, he’d want nothing to do with me.

“Rin-chan?”

Huh? Why did he sound so close? Was this still a dream?

Opening my eyes, I was greeted immediately by a bare chest. My heart raced as my gaze trailed upward to meet the pale face with the kind smile. “K-Komaeda-kun?”

I didn’t understand anything.

When I tried to shift away from him, I noticed something connecting us together and the friction between us made me let out a gaspy moan.

Komaeda sucked in a sharp breath, his face flushed while he regarded me with half-hooded eyes. “Your fever has finally broken. How are you feeling?”

I was afraid to find out what was happening beneath the sheets. This foreign sensation between my legs. “Are we - ? Did we - ?”

A dreamy look filled his face. “Oh, Rin-chan, I had the pleasure of being used by you – to be your stepping stone towards recovery…”

I eventually lifted myself enough to slide him out of me. There was an immediate sense of disappointment and emptiness. 

My thoughts were a mess, but I wasn’t angry. I was just confused and kind of sad that our first time couldn’t have been more memorable, but it seemed that Komaeda surely remembered it.

A sigh came from the right and I saw Hinata covering his face with one hand.

“H-Hinata-kun?!”

I let out a shriek as reality hit me hard and I wrapped myself tightly with the covers. While trying to scramble away from an extremely naked Komaeda, I managed to tangle our legs and I went tumbling over the edge of the bed.

“Rin-chan!”

I curled up into a ball, hiding every part of myself from view.

As I hid, Hinata stuttered his way into telling me everything.

I had contracted the Despair Disease and it had turned me into a whore – he hadn’t said it in those words, but the implications were clear. I had propositioned both him and Komaeda. I was so ashamed of myself. How was I to face any of them ever again? This was an absolute disaster!

Komaeda chuckled, lifting me back up into his lap. Fortunately, he had enough decency to don on his black jeans. “Don’t worry. As I said, helping you was my pleasure.”

“Komaeda!” Hinata scolded.

“Haha! Sorry! Sorry! It’s hard to resist when Rin-chan is so cute!” Komaeda was going to be the death of me!

I said nothing and refused to move. I pretended that I did not exist as Komaeda and Hinata argued.

“Ah… There’s something else I have to tell you. I know it’s a lot, but… There is no good time to say this.” I had a feeling what it was regarding, but not who. “Tsumiki also had the Despair Disease. It drove her to… to kill Mioda and Saionji.”

Both of them?! Tsumiki killed _two_ people?!

I poked y head out to see his sad, hazel eyes. “They’re… really dead?”

He gave me a sad, solemn nod.

Tears welled up in my eyes. Mioda and Tsumiki were so kind and innocent. 

Just days ago, Mioda was so excited to perform in her concert and all she ever seemed to want to do was make everyone around her happy. To think that I was never going to see the happy, energetic girl again was almost unthinkable.

And Tsumiki? She always tried to help, despite being clumsy and end up hurting herself in several different occasions. It was because of her dedication to treating the hurt that put her in that position. 

Even Saionji and her poor attitude didn’t deserve to die. She was only starting to become more comfortable with everyone else, too.

How could merely _remembering_ cause the nurse to commit double homicide? What memory was possible to cause such a change in her behaviour? I wasn’t even able to imagine her doing something so terrible! 

Wiping my eyes, I slowly stood up. “W-Where are my clothes? I don’t want to be here anymore. I’m sick of being in this hospital.”

They left the room to give me some privacy as I dressed. Hinata had to drag Komaeda away when the Ultimate Lucky Student offered to help me.

I took my time, going to the washroom to look at myself in the mirror. There were markings all over my body, finger prints and bite marks. I gingerly touched each of them, knowing that it was Komaeda’s doing.

A swirl of emotions battled within me.

Of all people, I was glad it was him I latched on to. I wasn’t sure how I’d react if it had been anyone else. Even knowing that I had propositioned Hinata didn’t feel so bad if Komaeda was there. Just the thought of cheating on him was devastating.

I slowly pulled my skirt on after I realised that my underwear had been shredded. Completely at the mercy of the Despair Disease, how desperate had we been? 

Next was the bra with its metal clasps gone. My blouse was a little bit see through, but I may be able to get away with it if no one brought attention to my chest.

I ran my fingers through my hair several times. It was very tangled, so I ended up twisting the tendrils into a messy bun and stabbed a pen through it. That was going to do for now, until I could return back to my cottage to take a thorough shower to get all the sweat and… other sticky substances off my body. 

“Okay, you have to face them sooner or later,” I whispered at my reflection. 

The pale-faced girl stared back at me with a look of uncertainty on her face.

“It’s going to be fine. Things might be a bit different between Komaeda-kun and you, but… Things will be fine. He still wants to be with you. He… He might not think you’re a slut, but… You can still fix it. You know that it was the Despair Disease that made you this way.” I swallowed some of the anxiety down. “It’s going to be fine. Everything will be fine.”

The face of the white-haired boy remained in my mind.

“Komaeda-kun…” I placed my hand over my chest. Just saying his name made my heart race.

When had I started feeling so strongly for him?

With a sigh, I gave myself several encouraging pats on the cheeks and stepped out to join the two who were waiting for me in the hallway. 

They stopped in mid-conversation to face me.

Komaeda-kun…

Hinata-kun…

“Okay, I’m ready, now.”

…

I had a warmer greeting than I expected. Sonia grabbed my hand and squeezed it. “I am gladdened to see that you are better!”

“The Dark Gods have been watching over you. Their powers have vanquished the evil forces that threatened your life!” Tanaka agreed, crossing his arms.

Even Souda mumbled something encouraging.

“Yeah!” a robot roared in excitement. “That’s the spirit!”

Who was - ?

“Ni… dai-san?” Was that really the team manager? The last I saw, he was barely clinging on to life. Was there a human body inside the robotic suit or was he somehow all electronic now? How did that even make sense? What kind of advanced technology was this?

“Yeah!” he shouted again. “I am more durable than ever!!!”

He was also louder than ever.

His booming voice was starting to give me a headache, but at least there was one good thing that came out of so much bad news.

I rubbed my eyes, suppressing a yawn. My body was still aching, but I couldn’t tell exactly what it was from. Could I still be contagious? I really didn’t want to give anyone the Despair Disease, especially when it could do something like make another person kill.

“It’s so wonderful seeing all of you Ultimates gather together with such hope!” Komaeda rejoiced. “But Rin-chan is looking pretty tired. I’ll take her to the motel for a shower and tucker her into bed.”

“Sh-Sh-Sh-Shower?!” Souda exclaimed. “Don’t tell me you’re going to help her with that?!”

Komaeda grinned cryptically at him. “Well, that’s up to Rin-chan, isn’t it? I’m merely here for her to use.”

“D-Don’t say weird things like that!” the mechanic pointed accusingly back at him.

Komaeda merely waved his hands at them, while I leaned tiredly against his side. I didn’t even have enough energy to add anything to the conversation.

“Do I have to shower…?” I mumbled. Getting clean suddenly plummeted in my list of priorities. I was on the verge of passing out again and each step I took was harder than the last.

He chuckled, ruffling my hair affectionately. ‘As much as I love you, you stink of sweat and sex.”

My face went bright red. “D-Don’t say it l-like that!”

Ugh! I wasn’t sure how I was ever going to get past what we had done. _Everyone_ knew I was a sex-crazed monster when I was sick.

And…

And…

I froze.

“L-Love…?” I whispered.

“Hm?” He tilted his head. “Does it disgust you to be loved by – “

I raised to my tippy toes and pulled him into a kiss. 

His eyes went wide before his pale cheeks glowed pink.

“I really like you, too, Komaeda-kun. I don’t know if it’s really love yet because I’m not sure I understand what love is, but… you’re the one I don’t ever want to let go,” I confessed, glad that we were no longer in range of curious eyes. “But…”

“But?”

I looked to the side. If I admitted it, would it push him away?

“Is it about Hinata-kun? Mister Ultimate Scatterbrain?”

Something must’ve shown on my face because he continued on. “Let’s talk about him another time.”

Was he angry? I wasn’t even sure when Hinata showed up on my radar. Was it when he helped me take care of Komaeda? Or perhaps as early as when he tried to defend me during the first class trial? Somewhere along the way, I found myself wanting a little more than just friendship, but the feeling still paled in comparison to how I felt about Komaeda. It felt so wrong to feel this way – to be so greedy.

“Okay.”

It was best not to dwell on it when my brain was still a mess.

In the end, Komaeda waited on my bed as I took a nice, warm bath that helped to soothe all the aches and pains.

When I was done, I found that he had dozed off on top of the covers, his hair spread out beneath him. It blended almost perfectly into the white pillow case.

He was so beautiful…

I smiled, running my hand through his fluffy locks. “Komaeda-kun…”

Pausing, I whispered, “Nagito-kun…”

I really wanted to address him more intimately now that he said he loved me. Would he be alright with that?

I laid down beside him and placed my head on his chest, listening to the rhythmic beast that calmed every nerve in my body.

A hand began to trail down my body and his face nuzzled into my hair. “Ah… Rin-chan smells so good…”

Oh! He was still awake?

“S-Stop!” I blushed.

He laughed. “I’m so happy Rin-chan still wants to be with me even when she’s not sick anymore.”

I huffed. “Go to sleep, Komaeda-kun.”

He hummed, burying his face deeper into my hair. “Say it, again…”

“Say what?”

“My name.”

“Komaeda-kun?”

“No, my other name.”

“N-Nagito-kun…?”

“Again.”

“Nagito-kun…”

How could I sleep now when my heart was pounding like this?

He moved his hand to stroke my back. “I really, really love you, Rin-chan. You are my hope.”

“And you’re mine, Nagito-kun. Now, go to sleep. M-My heart can’t take it anymore.”

He giggled, but fell silent after. He continued his calming rub, until my eyes drooped shut and I fell into a peaceful slumber.


	10. Chapter 10

“Ta da!” Monomi was looking a little worse for wear. “I’ve defeated another Monobeast! Please, enjoy exploring the fourth island!”

I patted her head. “Thank you, Monomi-chan, for all of your hard work.”

Her eyes sparkled. “I’m happy to help!”

“Hey, Hinata-kun, want to explore with us?” I asked the brunet who gave me a surprised look.

“S-Sure!” He got up from the table and joined Komaeda and me at the doorway.

When we arrived at the fourth island, my eyes lit up with glee. It was a giant amusement park! “Come on! Come on!” I ran forward and was nearly mowed down by a train if Komaeda hadn’t pulled me back in time.

“Rin…” Hinata sighed in exasperation.

Oops! Sometimes, I forgot about my bad luck when I was with Komaeda. “Sorry!” I laughed, not deterred by this mild misfortune.

Komaeda leaned down to my ear. “That looks like a good place to have some fun, doesn’t it?” He pointed to a castle with a cute cartoon mouse.

Why did it feel as if he was referring to more than just what the place was intended for?

“Komaeda!” Hinata scolded. He, too, seemed to have picked up on the innuendo.

The Ultimate Lucky Student merely laughed and pulled us forward.

Nezumi Castle was rather ordinary. It reminded me of a bit of a fairytale with talking animal animatronics.

Several times, Komaeda corned me with kisses. He didn’t even care that Hinata could see everything. What a pervert!

I went forward, running to get away from him as Hinata sighed, looking as if he was the parent of two rowdy kids.

When I tired myself out, I plopped down on to a four poster princess bed. Hinata sat on the edge as we waited for Komaeda to finish satiating his curiosity. 

“The two of you are going to give me premature grey hairs,” he muttered, tugging at his short strands.

I smiled. “But you had fun, right? You like spending time with us?”

He looked down at me, slowly nodding. “It’s almost as if life is normal again and we’ve not trapped on this island, forced to play a Killing game.”

“Yeah… I wonder what Komaeda is doing now…” I mumbled.

“Knowing him, he’s scheming something to keep us on our feet or trying to take apart Monokuma’s plans” he groaned back. He was right. That was exactly what Komaeda would do.

He meant well, but his methods were just a tiny bit unorthodox.

Hinata fell backwards and rested beside me.

That was how Komaeda found us and just as expected, he laid down on my other side. Moments later, he rolled on to his side and draped an arm over my stomach. He whispered dirty suggestions into my ears, knowing full well that he was loud enough for Hinata to hear.

The brunet was blushing from head to toe, trying to pretend that he wasn’t in the room.

We remained in our relaxed positions for a moment longer before moving on to our next destination – Usami’s Haunted House. It was there that we found out Hinata was a big scardy cat and Komaeda took great pleasure exploiting it.

I happily snatched a couple of photos from the booth outside the haunted house. There were a couple that showed Hinata screaming, Komaeda dressed as the grim reaper after taking it from a prop (Monomi wasn’t happy about that and made him put it back after and also scolded him about scaring fellow students), me peering behind a curtain, and both Komaeda and me jumping on a freaked out Hinata.

Needless to say, Hinata wasn’t very happy with us after that. He had his arms crossed and refused to say anything.

Komaeda was unhindered and laughed as he somehow managed to get the brunet talking again.

We met up with everyone at the food court where we gorged on junk food. I had a large blue cotton candy and was happily sharing a crazy heart-shaped straw with Komaeda who was holding the giant cup of soda. He, himself, was eating a pretzel and was trying to get me to try some, but I was content with all my sugary treats. 

“Should we go on the rollercoaster, next?” Hinata asked, garnering everyone’s echoing agreement.

We gathered in front of the giant roller coaster where Monokuma was waiting for us.

“There you are! Puhuhuhuhuhu!” He seemed oddly happy. “I have a gift for you~!”

He handed Hinata a black book with a symbol of Hope’s Peak Academy on it. “What? This is…”

Inside, were photos and small descriptions of everyone who had been in the last Killing Game. There were a total of sixteen students and all were killed, except six: Naegi Makoto, Kirigiri Kyoko, Asahina Aoi, Hagakure Yasuhiro, Fukawa Toko, and… Togami Byakuya?

Indeed, the photo was of the Ultimate Affluent Progeny, but he seemed to have been much skinnier back then. I guessed some people dealt with surviving something so horrific differently than others. 

“Why are you showing this to us, now?” Hinata asked, frowning at the bear.

“Puhuhu! There is a traitor among all of you – one that even I don’t know~!” 

“Traitor?” Komaeda tilted his head. “Hey, Hinata-kun. You don’t remember your talent, right? Is there anything else you don’t remember?”

I turned to him with a frown on my face. “Komaeda-kun…”

“What are you trying to say?” Hinata crossed his arms, looking irritated as he was being accused.

Komaeda smiled cryptically back at him. “Nothing. I’m just thinking over what Monokuma said.”

The bear laughed again before ushering us all in. “Have fun and I’ll see you on the other side!”

I was a little unsettled by the conversation just now. Why was Komaeda trying to put suspicion on Hinata? There was no proof that he was the traitor nor was there any proof that what Monokuma told us was true at all. 

We all climb into the cart. Hinata ended up choosing to sit beside Nanami near the front, while Komaeda made sure everyone else chose their seats before getting on into the last cart. I went with him, tucked against his side as the rollercoaster slowly roller forward before picking up speed. There were screams – the loudest coming from Nidai. Who knew he would be scared of something like this? He even took a missile to the chest with more grace!

“Haha! Everyone sure looks like they’re having fun!” Komaeda laughed.

And of course, he was completely unaffected by the plummeting ride that made my heart drop with it. As much as I liked rollercoaster, I would never be able to have a normal conversation on one. I didn’t think it was even physically possible, but there he went…

Was Komaeda even real?

As the ride raced into a dark tunnel, we were suddenly all hit by thick smoke that made me feel nauseated and seconds later, the world faded to black.

I was woken up by something small and furry nudging my face. When I opened my eyes, I saw that it was one of Tanaka’s hamsters, San-D. He had a sunflower seed in his tiny hands and cuddling against my cheek.

So cute…

I poked its soft stomach, watching him squeak and head butt my finger.

“You’re awake… I knew San-D’s powers would be sufficient to wake the dead!” Tanaka declared, laughing in triumph as I sat up, cupping the hamster in my hands.

I looked around to find Jump-P sleeping in Komaeda’s fluffy hair.

Ah… Too cute… 

Definitely too cute.

“Ne, Komaeda-kun…” I gently nudged him and when that didn’t work, I placed San-D on his face. The little hamster rolled around, causing Komaeda’s nose to crinkle when the fur tickled it. After three passes, he let out a sneeze, scaring San-D enough to scurry back into the safety of Tanaka’s puce scarf. 

Jump-P, however, managed to stay asleep and also stay in the snowy white hair as Komaeda sat up. Impressive…

“Nagito-kun.”

“Rin-chan…” He checked me out to make sure I was alright before letting out a relieved sigh. “You’re okay?”

I nodded. “I’m fine.” I grabbed his wandering hand to nuzzle it against my cheek.

“Good… I thought… I thought my luck cycle had finally caught up to me…” His luck cycle was a strange thing. He would have bouts of good luck before bad luck struck and once it did, he’d be blessed with even better luck! After meeting him, I found my own luck seemed to have adapted something similar. It was a truly surreal experience.

The Despair Disease was at the end of my last round. That should mean I was going to be alright for the next few days, but I hoped nothing worse than the disease would arise. That had been close calls for both of us.

Once everyone woke up, we began to look around the strange room. It was so pink that my eyes started to burn. What was this atrocity?

“Tada~! This is the Strawberry House!” Monokuma popped out, throwing his nubbly arms excitedly into the air. He proceeded to go over the layout of each of the three floors, including something called the Final Dead Room.

What kind of name was that?

Why did it feel as if anyone who dared to step inside would die?

“This is the motive – an escape room! Puhuhuhu… This is a completely closed space and the only way to leave is when the killing begins!” With that, he was gone again.

“That was quite straightforward,” Komaeda sighed.

My shoulders slumped. I knew the amusement park was too good to be true! Monokuma wouldn’t even let us enjoy it for a while longer.

Nanami tilted her head. “I think… We should all try to look for an exit, anyway.”

Komaeda shook his head. ‘If there’s an exit, then this wouldn’t be a closed space, which would make this motive useless.”

“Don’t fuck with me!” Kuzuryu shouted. “There’s no way I’m going to lay down and die here!”

My snowy-haired lover hugged himself. “Ah… This must be hope… Hope when there is none. Hope that your friends will not kill you to escape. How wonderful…”

I tugged his jacket sleeve, causing him to smile at me. “Stop being weird, Nagito-kun.”

He chuckled, ruffling my hair. “Let me show you how I feel…” He leaned down, pressing his lips against mine as if he could somehow transfer his deep obsession through this contact.

It made me feel better about the situation, but that might just be because I really like his kisses.

“Oh! That is so romantic!” Sonia gushed.

Souda immediately piped up, “M-Miss Sonia! I can show – “

“Disgusting…” Kuzuryu scoffed.

When Komaeda straightened his back once more, both our cheeks were painted pink.

“So… cute…” Sonia continued to coo, eyes turning into hearts as she gazed at us.

Hinata cleared his throat. “Let’s go have a look around and see if we can find anything. Does anyone want to go with me?”

No one volunteered. What Komaeda said seemed to have affected everyone else. Did they really think he could be the traitor? It was hard to imagine, but…

Didn’t we all think that of Tsumiki? It wasn’t until she started remembering what she was like before that she became a killer.

“I’ll go with you,” I offered, smiling softly as I tried to alleviate those hurt eyes.

Komaeda sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I guess that can’t be helped. I’ll go with you, too.”

Hinata frowned and glared at the snowy-haired boy. It appeared as if he wanted to confront him about what was said earlier, but decided against that at the last moment.

I felt bad for him. Since the very beginning, Hinata had been the main person helping to solve each murder. Besides, if everyone was suspicious about him because we didn’t know anything about his talent, then that would be hypocritical. It wasn’t as if we really knew much about everyone else either. 

“Are you okay, Hinata-kun?” I asked, placing a hand on his arm.

He started. “Huh? Wh-Why wouldn’t I be?”

“It’s okay to be sad and feel betrayed,” I started. “What’s important is getting through it. Besides, none of us are bad people. The truth will come out and everything will turn out fine.”

Hinata shifted his gaze to Komaeda who was looking at everything without a care in the world.

I shook my head. “Ignore what he said earlier. You know how he could be. He didn’t mean anything by it, just saying strange things like he usually does, so please… Don’t let it bring you down, Hinata-kun.”

Slowly, he nodded, but didn’t appear as convinced as I hoped.

Feeling annoyed by what occurred earlier, I went over to Komaeda. “What was that about? Why did you say all that stuff about Hinata-kun?”

“I wasn’t lying, Rin-chan. I was only asking questions that everyone was thinking. We all have Talents, but Hinata-kun seemed have forgotten his. Why is that?” He looked thoughtfully to the side. “To solve anything, you have to look at every angle without bias. I don’t mean any harm with what I said, just to incite thought. Are you angry at me, Rin-chan?”

He wasn’t entirely wrong. I just hated seeing any distention between the two of them. 

“Can you please make up with Hinata-kun? The two of you like this…” 

He tilted my chin up. “I’ll talk to him later. You know I’d do anything for you, Rin-chan.”

I smiled and nodded. 

We continued to look around. There was still tension as the important conversation to mend their relationship hadn’t happened yet, but I had hoped it was going to be alright. 

“Who’s this?” I wondered, looking at a portrait of an old man.

_Hope’s Peak Academy Founder: Kamukura Izuru_

“Wow…” That was kind of cool, but why was his photo here? Did he have anything to do with what’s been happening to us – these Killing Games?


	11. Chapter 11

I stopped in front of the towering doors of the Final Dead Room. Even the painted clown face was ominous.

“Hm…” Komaeda looked thoughtfully at it, while I quickly tied to rid him of any silly thoughts that may lead to him going in.

Just the very name of the room sounded like a trap and knowing Monokuma, he was bound to put a twist to it.

Once we were done, we were left just as clueless as before. We waited at the hallway that led to an elevator with a picture of a grape on it. 

The others soon joined us, looking just as dejected. Komaeda was the only one at ease. In fact, he was treating this like a game – a mere puzzle to solve with nothing at stake.

“I guess we should see where this goes,” Hinata quietly suggested as if afraid that the others were going to accuse him of being a traitor, again.

“Yeah, let’s go.” I walked in and waited for them to join me. There was only one button. The elevator didn’t feel as if it was moving at all, but the door eventually opened into a room that was only a fraction better than the Strawberry House.

Monokuma was already waiting for us here. He showed us a map of grape House and explained the similarity between the two. The only difference was that there was no Final Dead Room and the shapes of the floors were different. Grape House was hexagonal, opposed to the typical rectangular. The third floor here had the Monokuma Archives instead of the indoor park.

We went up and down this floor as well, looking through every room, but it was useless. 

There were no exits.

We were in a windowless space with only pre-placed clocks to tell the time.

Nanami let out a yawn, slowly falling asleep on her feet.

“We should split up. The boys and the girls can each claim one of the houses.

Nidai suggested that the boys could stay in the Strawberry House, so that was easily decided.

Next, came the rooms. 

The boys fought for them through Rock, Paper, Scissors because there was going to be on person left over for them. Komaeda and Tanaka ended up with the Deluxe Rooms, Nidai with Standard, and Kuzuryu and Souda with the Crummy Rooms, which left Hinata last with nothing.

The girls were much more civilized. Owari wanted a Crummy room, and I didn’t mind between Deluxe and Standard, so Chiaki and Sonia took the Deluxe Rooms.

“Since we have an extra room, why don’t you stay at the Grape House with us?” Sonia suggesting, causing Souda to protest.

“B-B-But he could be the tr…” Souda trailed off, catching himself before he could finish when he saw the hurt look on Hinata’s face. Before the speculations, they had actually been rather close.

“I insist!” Sonia pushed.

Hinata looked conflicted. He thought they all hated him now, but that wasn’t true. Even though there were some people more cautious than others, he still had a fair amount of allies on his side.

“Rin-chan will be staying with me, so there will be another extra room there,” Komaeda declared, pulling me to his side.

“Wh-What?!” Souda shouted. “A boy and a girl shouldn’t – “

“It’s not as if I haven’t seen all of Rin-chan already.” He pecked me on the cheek, causing my face to turn bright red.

“D-Don’t say things like that,” I protested, giving his face a soft pat.

“I-I’ll take the Crummy Room,” Hinata decided, looking uncomfortable.

Komaeda practically pushed me into the elevator and dragged me up the stairs. As soon as the door was locked, he was on top of me with my back flat on the soft, luxurious mattress. I didn’t even get a chance to have a more thorough look around!

“A-Ah!” I cried, squirming beneath him.

His eyes darkened as he looked down at me. “Forgive me, Rin-chan, for taking such liberties. I’m truly the worst of the worst, but I can’t control myself anymore.”

He licked a line up my neck, ending behind my right ear. “Please, allow me to make you feel good. Let me fill you with the brightest of hope.”

His words were barely registering in my head. I was about to spontaneously combust with how hot I was feeling. Was I sick again or was this all because of Komaeda?

How could he make me feel this way?

“P-Please…” I softly panted. I didn’t even know what I was asking for, so he decided for me.

His gently hands slid away my skirt, socks, and loafers. He pried open my blouse just enough to pop out my breasts.

He arranged me in front of him like a priceless piece of art.

“Ha… So beautiful…” The adoring, perverted look on his face made me slick between the legs. He was looking at me with contagious lust. “Rin-chan… Rin-chan…”

“N-Nagi… Nagito-kun…” I moaned when he buried his face between my breasts. His hot breath brushed the right nipple, causing it to harden. They were so sensitive that it almost hurt.

It felt so normal to be intimate with him. Was it because of what I had done when I had the Despair Disease? Could it be something more?

Even though I couldn’t remember everything, I still recalled snippets and every moment was filled with need and pleasure. He made me feel so good that I couldn’t stop myself from taking more and Komaeda being Komaeda, he gave and gave. It didn’t matter if I woke him up, he was always ready.

I ran my hand through his fluffy hair, relishing at how soft it felt.

“Rin-chan, may I?” He nudged at my panties, brushing against the bundle of nerves just above my folds.

I cried out, arching my back. “Y-Yes… Please, Nagito, you’re driving me crazy!”

He laughed, pulling the fabric off and unzipped himself. After shedding his clothes, he rubbed his engorged member along my slit, until it was thoroughly lubricated. “Allow me the pleasure of making you mine properly this time.”

I wrapped my arms around him and with my face buried at the crook of his neck, I nodded. In a way, this was going to be my first time. I refused to accept that I had lost it while completely out of my mind and under the Despair Disease.

He slid in, slowly sinking his cock inch by inch, until he could go no further. He nudged the very end, testing whether it’ll give. It felt as if he was trying to stretch me wider than I could go.

I wiggled a few times, trying to adjust, and when it stopped hurting too bad, I mumbled for him to move.

He started a slow, romantic rhythm that made me feel every inch of him moving in and out of me. His every bulging vein scratched along my pulsing walls. “Rin-chan feels so good,” he groaned, capturing my lips with his. “I never want this to stop. Want to be with Rin-chan forever – stay in Rin-chan forever~!”

I clenched my eyes shut, gasping for him. “H-Hard, Nagito-kun!”

He lifted my hips and thrust in quicker and faster, slamming deep within me, until it hurt, but the pain was fleeting and only heighted the pleasure.

How had I ever lived life without knowing this feeling?

How perverted…

This was…

This was…

I let out a scream as he brought me over the edge. I could feel him frantically pump into my before groaning loudly. He stilled, sheathed as far as he could be without breaking my body. His cock twitched as I felt his seed spurt inside me. 

The feeling of absolute completeness…

Nagito-kun…

“Rin-chan so beautiful…” he whispered, stroking my hair. His naked body was still on top of mine, while he continued to mumble to himself.

I moved, gently nudging him to the side with my hips, but he refused to separate. He managed to switch out position without sliding out. His half erect member was enough o remain inside me.

“Mm…” I hummed, cuddling up against his chest. “’Love you, Nagi…”

…

So pretty…

So pretty…

He giggled happily to himself, holding her as tightly as he could without waking her up.

He still couldn’t believe that his hope would let him touch her like this. For something worse than trash to touch someone so precious…

His cock twitched inside her. Rin-chan always made him feel so good.

Now, if Hinata-kun was also here… What an interesting trio they would make. He knew Rin-chan liked the brunet. 

He also liked him. 

He had hope that oozed out of his every word. It was inspiring. All the class trials were successful only because of how Hinata-kun conducted himself. He loved hearing Hinata-kun talk. That was why he always egged him on. Hinata-kun was so fun to play with. Nothing ever damped that hope.

But he knew he was tempting fate. This luck would run out soon and Rin-chan was going to get hurt again. He didn’t want to lose her like he did his parents and his dog. They had all once more precious to hi too, but now, they were all gone…

Taken away from him because of his terrible luck.

“Let me be selfish for a little longer,” he whispered, burying his face in her hair. Just a little longer because I can’t stop loving you. My poor, blackened heart craves your attention. Don’t take Rin-chan away from me. Please, don’t take her away…”

His eyes slowly drifted shut with her scent surrounding him. Her face appeared in his dreams and when he woke up, she was still quietly slumbering on his chest. He waited as long as he could for her to wake up, but he was growing harder and harder inside her. He wouldn’t be able to control himself for much longer.

It started with gentle rocking, but when his condition only grew worse, he quickened his pace, sliding dazedly in and out of her... Drool trailed down the side of his face. His breathing was so laboured that he nearly missed her quietly moans. “Ah! G-Good morning, Rin-chan! I-I-I’m s-sorry for… ha… waking you u-up!”

She didn’t reply with anything coherent, merely meeting his thrusts. Her eyes were closed and her face was half hidden by his chest.

“R-Rin-chan… Rin-chan!” he groaned, feeling himself close. “Love Rin-chan s-so much…”

She propped herself up before straddling him. Her flaming locks were a sexy mess and she looked at him with her beautiful grey eyes filled with desire – desire for scum not fitting for the sewers. 

Ah…

A squeak and a scream left her lips when she came. She tossed her head back, displaying her pale neck – so vulnerable, so trusting…

He raised himself up on to his elbows and managed to capture a bit of flesh between his teeth. He bit down as he, too, found release.

Her arms wrapped around him, holding him close. He marked her as his, lapping at the red mark he made on her neck.

When he slowly parted from her, he watched intently as she slowly slid him out and couldn’t help but push her back on the mattress. He stared at the point between her legs where their juices were mixed together.

His milky white seed was leaking out of her.

So beautiful…

Rin-chan was all his…

…

Komaeda stared at me as if I was an intriguing movie. His eyes were mostly fixated on where his cum was dripping out of me. It was so perverted that I couldn’t stop leaking. I never thought I could be so… needy, but he made me this way. He made me feel so good.

My Nagito-kun.

“We should head to Monokuma Tai Chi soon,” I mumbled, hating that I had to get out of bed, but it couldn’t be helped. There was no doubt going to be some terrible consequence for not going.

He nodded, gathering my clothes first to give to me before doing the same for himself. His hands somehow managed to grab a hold of several of my body parts as we left, meeting the rest coming out of their respective rooms.

“Ugh… You two actually d-did it, didn’t you?” Souda accused, staring at the arm around my waist.

“Oh, did you hear that?” Komaeda laughed, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment, knowing full well that our deluxe rooms were soundproof.

“Actually?!” Souda gaped at us as I hid my face. 

Kuzuryu’s face was also red. “Shut up!” He had his arms crossed and turned away from us. “And we didn’t hear anything!”

Komaeda laugh, again. “Of course. The deluxe rooms are very well insulated. We couldn’t hear anything outside, so I assumed no one would be able to hear us, either.”

I whacked his chest with the back of my hand. “Then why did you just tell everyone what we did?” I hissed.

He grinned cheekily back at me. “I want everyone to know you’re mine, Rin-chan.” His smile disappeared and I could see the sadness peek through. “But I must’ve crossed the line, this time. I got too comfortable… To selfish… no one would ever want to be publically associated with me.”

His arm dropped to his side.

I huffed. “That’s not it! I don’t mind everyone knowing we’re together! I just… You know I’m kind of shy about… about…” I mumbled the last word under my breath.

“I’m glad. I’m really glad Rin-chan isn’t ashamed of me,” he whispered, stroking my cheek with his thumb. “I can’t imagine living without you anymore.”

I felt the same way and was happy to hear him admit it. It didn’t matter that we had only known each other briefly. What we had was much deeper than that and something in me knew he was the one. My heart yearned for Komaeda Nagito.

“Good morning, everyone!” Monokuma greeted us when we arrived. “Since the last lazy bones have arrived, we can finally begin!”

Monokuma had us all follow him in his Tai Chi movements. It was strange since he was a teddy bear with nubbly arms.

The activity took exactly an hour and after that, it was free time.

I took Komaeda up to the indoor park and sat on the swing. I grinned, looking at him from over my shoulders as I excitedly kicked my legs. “Push me?”

He happily complied.

I laughed, loving the feel of the breeze in my hair. Higher and higher I went until the top bar was in sight. It really started to felt as if I was flying.

When Hinata walked in, I animatedly waved my hand at him, shaking the swing haphazardly as I did so.

“Whoa!” Komaeda stared worriedly at me as I nearly fell off the creaking swing set. “Be careful, Rin-chan!”

I wasn’t listening and somehow managed to get my feet on to the seat. My balance was off and with each pendulum, it felt as if I was about to fall. “Catch me, Hinata-kun!” I shouted right before leaping into the air.

The brunet let out a fearful shout, but he managed to run forward fast enough to be my human cushion. Our bodies tumbled to the ground.

“Rin-chan, don’t do that! My heart can’t take it!” Komaeda sighed, rubbing his chest as he knelt by our bodies.

I grinned at him, cheeks flushed from adrenaline. “We’re okay!”

“Speak for yourself…” Hinata groaned, rubbing the back of his head.

Komaeda wrapped his arms around me, holding me close. “You’re killing me, Rin-chan.”

Hinata made a strange sound as we kissed on top of him. From where I was still straddling his waist, I could feel his bulge poke at me.

“Ah… Nagi…” I moaned, breaking away and leaving a string of saliva connecting us.

He leaned forward for another kiss. His neediness was arousing. I wanted more and my body instinctively began to rock.

Hinata gasped, digging his fingers into my hips. “R-Rin…”

I looked at him with half-hooded eyes, never breaking contact with Komaeda. He was staring back at me with flushed cheeks.

“Rin-chan is naughty,” Komaeda chuckled, also casting his eyes on the brunet.

“S-Stop!” Hinata shouted. ‘What are you guys playing at?” The hurt was clearly on his face as he sat up and scooted back, away from us.

Komaeda tilted his head. “Don’t you like us, Hinata-kun?”

“I… I…” he stuttered before looking away. “Does it matter?”

I giggled. “It does, but take your time, Hinata-kun. We clearly have a lot of time here at the Fun House.”

He said nothing, but his eyes constantly flitted back to where Komaeda was holding me.

Suddenly, there was a loud growl from his stomach that broke the tension and his face grew even darker. “S-Sorry!”

I burst out laughing. “It’s okay. I’m really hungry, too.”

Komaeda nodded again me.

We were all hungry and this was only the beginning. Beneath the fun and games, we were on the edge of despair because we knew that unless one of us committed murder, were going to be stuck here until we all perished.


	12. Chapter 12

As hunger really set in, I began to spend more and more time in bed, only getting up to attend Monokuma Tai Chi. Each day was harder than the last.

Every movement would make my head spin.

Seeing everyone else, I could tell that we were all wearing down. It didn’t help that the walls were covered with strawberries and grapes – a constant reminder of food that we had no access to. 

They danced in my eyes, taunting me with their vibrant colours.

Sometimes, Hinata would return with us to our room, lying on the bed with his eyes closed. He was still indecisive about my proposition and I didn’t blame him. This really wasn’t the time for such a big decision was it? Everyone had better things to worry about.

Besides, I was content with just being able to spend time with both of my boys. The speculation that Hinata could be the traitor had passed over. No one wanted to think too hard on something with absolutely no evidence.

“Ne, Hinata-kun…” I mumbled. “What do you think your talent is…?”

He let out a soft sigh, turning to his side to look at me with droopy eyes. “Dunno… “Think I talked about this with Komaeda when I first woke up on the island.”

“He’s the Ultimate Scatterbrain,” Komaeda chuckled, peeking over my shoulder to shoot a teasing look at the brunet who was sputtering back a response.

I giggled. “Hinata-kun is pretty scatterbrained sometimes, isn’t he?”

“Rin…” he sighed.

“It’s okay, Hinata-kun. We still think you’re cute.”

He turned bright red and rolled the other way.

After a moment, I poked him in the lower back, watching him squirm. “Ah… Hinata-kun is ticklish?” I poked him, again, to get the same reaction.

“S-Stop!” He blindly tried to whack my hand away, but I was unhindered, prodding him until he stopped responding and it became boring.

I placed my hand gently on the mattress between us. Uncertainty slowly crept back in. 

“Ne, Hinata-kun… Do you think we’ll be okay…?” I quietly asked.

He took a minute to reply, “Yeah. We’ll be okay.”

Komaeda wrapped his arm tightly about my waist, pulling me flush against his body. “We’re going to protect Rin-chan together!” He pecked me on the cheek and sighed happily.

I smiled back at him, pulling him in for more.

We continued to cuddle, giggling as we continued to exchange teasing kisses.

Hinata stubbornly stayed on his side of the bed, but turned back to face us with his eyes closed and his hand in mine.

With a smile, I closed my eyes as well and drifted off.

“Rin-chan? Rin-chan?” I could hear the concern in his voice, but I couldn’t bring myself to open my eyes.

He sighed, holding me tighter and whispered words of comfort into my ears.

I was so hungry that I didn’t even feel hungry anymore.

I was just tired…

Everything was so heavy.

Just like that, all the days blended together, until Komaeda and I stood in front of the Final Dead Room after another tortuous morning of Tai Chi.

“Don’t go in,” I mumbled with my head pressed to the side of his arm. “It looks dangerous. I don’t want anything to happen to you.” If Komaeda died, I would be devastated. While he kept calling me his hope, he was mine as well. To lose him would make me fall into despair.

He tilted my chin towards him. “I can’t keep watching you like this. Your hope is flickering and I can’t allow that to happen,” he told me, resting his forehead on mine. “Besides, I’m the Ultimate Lucky Student, remember? Nothing will happen to me even if I…”

Even if he wanted to…

There is was, again.

He didn’t fear death because he had been actively seeking it. 

He had even done it several times here. The first being the set up that led to Togami’s murder. A part of him had wanted to be the one to be killed by Hanamura and that was why he had told the chef everything. He wanted to be the one to die to start up the Killing Game, not Togami.

Was it terrible that I was glad he didn’t die?

My entire life would be so different without him and I wouldn’t know I’d have a chance at happiness. So even though I was afraid that applying to Hope’s Peak Academy had been a mistake after finding myself on a terribly sandy beach, it all kind of worked out. If we could get out of here alive, I could selfishly try for a life with Komaeda.

I had been on the same boat of him before – drowning in my own self-pity and sorrow, but it was finally beginning to fade because I had found my reason to fight on and I wasn’t about to let him take it away!

“Nagito-kun, you – “

He kissed me. It was soft and sweet. His feelings merged with mine as I melted into him. “I love you, Rin-chan. You don’t have to worry. I’ve found my reason to live, so I won’t leave you. I’ll be back, so just wait for me, okay?”

I bit my lips, hoping that his words were absolute, but our future was unknown. “I love you, too.” I pulled him back in for another kiss as if it was going to be our last. Our good luck was bound to run out sooner or later and I had such a terrible feeling at the pit of my stomach.

With one more hug, I finally let him go and watched as he disappeared behind the large clown doors.

There could be anything in there and he had just strolled in as if it was a normal haunted house. What gruesome, unimaginable obstacles were waiting for him in there?

What if he never came back out?

What if this was really how I lose him?

What if…

What if…

“He went in.”

I jumped at the deep voice to see Tanaka watching me with his arms crossed. His cute hamsters were looking a little more lethargic than normal, but otherwise, I was glad to see them still healthy.

Nodding, I replied, “I’m worried. Nagito-kun has always been reckless.” His luck was the only thing that kept him alive.

“The dark spirits tell me that luck is still in his favour,” he stated.

I knew he was saying this to comfort me and I appreciated it. “Want to hang out? I’m not sure what to do with myself now that he’s not here, but… I’m not going to be very good company either. I’m pretty tired, but I… I just… I don’t want to be alone, right now.”

He regarded me with understanding eyes and silently nodded.

We didn’t do much as we were both lethargic and starving, but his company was comforting, even if it meant sitting at the lobby.

I played with the hamsters for a good hour, watching in amusement as they rolled around like tiny fluff balls. I still couldn’t believe that someone as strange and seemingly dark as Tanaka would have these cute things with him. As the Ultimate Breeder, I wondered what other cute animals he had.

Feeling lightheaded again, I informed him that I was going to return to my room to try to sleep it off, but the world tilted sideways the moment I stood up and everything went to black.

_“Rin-chan… I’m so happy to see you…_

_“My body feel so strange…_

_“Hope… is truly stupendous…”_

A hand brushed through my hair as I finally opened my eyes to see Komaeda hovering over me with an unreadable expression on his face. 

“Nagito-kun…” I mumbled. Had I been dreaming? What time was it? I hoped that I didn’t miss Monokuma Tai Chi. “Did you go into the Final Dead Room or was I just…?”

“I went in and Monokuma gave me this when I finished.” He held up a black book that looked similar to the one we were shown before getting on to the rollercoaster. It had the same symbol of Hope’s Peak Academy.

Slowly, I sat up to look at the object that had been dropped into my lap. The book looked so innocent, but I knew the information inside would be anything but. The first one he had freely given us was about the previous class. This one that Komaeda had to work for, it had to be worth something even more.

What other bombshell was Monokuma going to drop on us, now?

Uncertain, I opened the book and began to slowly read through every word. Concentrating on the paragraphs was difficult, but I knew Komaeda showed this to me for an important reason. 

There was so much information on _us_ – the us that we had no memories of.

Togami Byakuya wasn’t even actually Togami Byakuya. He was the Ultimate Imposter and had no known name. He had also been manipulated by Enoshima Junko to become part of the Ultimate Despair.

Another notable person was Hinata Hajime. He had no Ultimate talent at all and was part of the Reserve Course at Hope’s Peak Academy. The Reserve Course that was known to have no place there other than to support those with talents, even one as useless as mine. I never understood why anyone would want to do that, especially when that fact was so well known. This was interesting information, but not crucial. Hinata was Hinata. Where he was accepted into didn’t really matter to me.

I slowly flipped the page to see my own school photo that I couldn’t recall taking.

Saeki Rin.

Ultimate Unlucky Student.

Brainwashed to join the Ultimate Despair by Enoshima Junko.

It was hard to read. I couldn’t recall any of it. What did this all mean?

Even Komaeda had fallen victim.

Who was this Enoshima? 

I vaguely recalled seeing her face in the first book, but there wasn’t anything too remarkable. She had been the Ultimate Fashionista, so how?

How could we all have fallen into despair because of her?

“It was all a lie,” he whispered. “Hope… You were supposed to be my hope…”

“The me now… I don’t remember anything about being brainwashed or being part of the Ultimate Despair,” I quietly said, wondering what he was thinking. “Does it matter what happened in the past?”

Komaeda let out that chilling laugh that sent cold shivers down my spine. “AHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHA!” The madness filled his eyes like it did in the first class trial. “Rin-chan… We are the embodiments of despair! People… trash like us do not deserve to be alive!”

I slowly go up to put some distance between us, stumbling as my legs nearly collapsed below me. “What if… What if this is all made up? How can we even trust anything Monokuma gives us? All of this is just to make us kill each other!” That had to be it. This new information was too farfetched. This was just another motive, right?

He suddenly slammed his hand against the wall beside my head and that was when my legs gave me. “He has no reason to lie about this. We are all disgusting – the worst of the worst! Beings without hope… Only existence is to spread more despair…”

“Y-You’re scaring me…” Tears filled my eyes. He had never directed his anger at me before. In fact, he had never been like this at all! “Please, N-Nagito-kun… C-Can we just talk? We can w-work through thi – “

“Leave...” he mumbled, dropping his hand to his side. He regarded me with such disgust – such hatred…

His green eyes were a dark storm, swirling like a disaster waiting to happen. “I can’t stand to see you…”

Those words…

“To think I could feel anything but revulsion for someone so full of despair…”

I never thought I could feel pain like this. It was as if he had my heart in his hand and he was squeezing as hard as he could. Even breathing was becoming difficult.

Somehow, I managed to scramble to my feet and staggered to the door. I blindly walked through the shifting halls and half fell down the stairs to the elevator. All I could think about was getting as far away from him as possible because I truly didn’t think my heart could take anymore.

I needed someone to talk to. Hinata would hear me out… He would listen to me…

With each wavering step, I drew closer and closer to the Crummy Room I knew he was staying at, but just before I could reach it, I heard two voices arguing near the stairs. Had I just missed them earlier? Did I walk pass them? I couldn’t recall…

My mind was so fuzzy…

Everything hurt.

Just as I was about to knock on Hinata’s door, I stopped and decided to investigate the disturbance.

My heart dropped further seeing Tanaka and Nidai fighting.

Why…?

They shouldn’t be trying to hurt each other!

“S-Stop… Stop!” I shouted.

Miraculously, they both halted and stared at me in shock.

“Don’t fight…” I begged. Wasn’t there enough pain in the world?

All this despair…

We couldn’t allow it to take over who we truly were.

I didn’t want that book to be true.

They had to hang on to hope.

“We have to stop killing each other! This… This isn’t right. We’re being manipulated to think that we don’t have a choice, but we do! And we have to keep believing that because it’s the only way to keep ourselves from falling into despair!” I sobbed, feeling everything slowly weigh me down. I was so tired of this.

“M-Monokuma… If I killed myself, would the others be free?” I whispered, knowing that the bear was always watching – always listening.

“Why are you asking that?” Nidai asked, concern clearly in his voice.

The bear popped up with a devious grin on his face. “Nope! It will have to be murder. Cold blooded murder! Puhuhuhuhuhu!” He disappeared as quickly as he appeared.

“There is discordance in your soul,” Tanaka stated, also frowning at me. 

“I shall be the one to - !” Nidai never had the chance to finish when I interrupted him.

I stepped up to his cyborg form and bowed as low as I could go. My mind was made up, especially after seeing what these two were fighting about. “If you were going to sacrifice yourself, then please kill me.”

They both froze.

“W-What? Th-That is not part of the plan!” He was so loud that I was afraid someone would hear before we could finish this.

“I beg you. I am… I am certain of my decision. You would be doing me a favour that I could never repay you for, but you would have my eternal gratitude.” I bit my lips to keep the tears from falling, but they were welling up in my eyes, making it even harder to see. 

Everything hurt too much.

“Saeki…” Tanaka clenched his hands. “That is a preposterous request! Not even the Dark Gods would - !”

“ _Please_ ,” I cried, my own hands were shaking as I tried desperately to wipe the tears away, but they just kept falling. “E-Even if you don’t do this f-for me… I’ll do it m-myself! W-Why waste another l-life? Use my w-worthless one… Full of d-d-despair…!”

No amount of medication could help me, now…

No amount of therapy would convince me otherwise.

“I will…”

“I will do it,” Tanaka offered, cutting off Nidai, once more.

The Ultimate Team Manager would have none of it. They argued as I thought about every decision I had made only to lead up to this point. I was always going to be a disappointment. I was misfortune personified. Komaeda had given me the illusion of happiness and security. It was only fitting for him to be the one to take it all away.

I only lamented that someone else would have to die to kill me, but at least I could save one person with my meaningless existence. That was more than I could ever hope for…

Hope…

Who knew something so beautiful could be so painful…?

Ha…

“May I… May I ask for just one more favour before I… go?” I quietly asked.

“Go on…” Tanaka mumbled, having a hard time looking at me.

“May I have a… hug?”

Without question, their arms wrapped around me and even the Four Dark Devas of Destruction cuddled against my cheek. 

I wouldn’t be able to say goodbye to anyone else, but that was probably for the best. They might try to stop me and I couldn’t have that, not when I could finally make the pain stop.

I was such a hypocrite… 

Everything I said about hope when I had already utterly fallen into despair.

_I’m sorry Hinata-kun…_

_Maybe in another life, we could’ve had more time to get to know each other. Maybe we could’ve even had a future together…_

I hoped that he didn’t think I was playing with his emotions. Everything I said was true.

_Komaeda-kun…_

_I wish…_

_I wish I could’ve been enough for you…_

_All I wanted was to be your hope…_

I should’ve known I could never be enough.

_All I wanted was for you to start loving yourself._

I hoped that you would never feel the despair I felt.

_If only I could’ve given you a shred of the happiness that you gave me._

Because while it lasted…

I was truly happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops... Don't hate me?????


	13. Chapter 13

He sighed, feeling the instant hit of guilt and regret, along with a barrage of self-hatred. He hadn’t meant to treat her like that and her look of absolute _fear_ towards him was almost too much to bear.

What had he done? He had driven away his only light – his hope – because of a stupid book. True, it held important information, but she was also right. He had allowed himself to be consumed completely by the shock of knowing that they were all part of the Ultimate Despair.

His anger hadn’t even been meant for her. It was mostly towards himself and he had wrongfully projected it to the first person he saw and now, she was gone.

How could he get her to forgive him? How could he make it up to her? How was he even to ask her for her forgiveness when he clearly didn’t deserve any? To begin with, he never deserved her love and hope. He knew she was too good for him. He knew. He knew and he still clung on to her.

Because he was selfish.

He craved her attention, her trust, her light, her hope.

He needed her.

He began to tug his hair in frustration.

Before she came into his life, he was depressed. He hated everything about himself. He hated how his luck took everything away from him.

“I love you, Rin-chan…” he sobbed, falling on to the bed. Her scent filled his nose. “Rin-chan…”

His thoughts and guilt continued to consume him, until there as a familiar sound that made him groggily sit up.

_Ding Dong Bing Bong!_

“A body has been discovered!” Monokuma announced. “After a certain amount of time has passed, the class trial will begin!”

Shortly after, the bear appeared with a bun wrapped in plastic and a bottle of water. “Here you go!” he snickered as he padded out of the room.

He wasn’t ready for this. His grizzled mind wasn’t prepared for another investigation. All he wanted to do was find Rin-chan and apologise.

Then again, they were all going to have to gather, so he could talk to her then.

The entire journey down the stairs and towards the elevator, he was going through all the ways he could grovel for forgiveness.

“The elevator isn’t working!” Souda growled in frustration as Kuzuryu shouted for him to fix it.

Tanaka was looking solemn as he leaned against the wall with his arms crossed and Nidai stood beside him. 

He tilted his head. “Try opening the panel and rotating it one-hundred and eighty degrees,” he mumbled before turning around and going into the Final Dead Room, instead.

In there, he was able to go through the trap door and jumped down into the Grape House.

He instinctively headed to where the commotion was, looking around for the one he was seeking, while also trying to figure out who wasn’t there.

The crowd slowly parted and his eyes trailed up from the black loafers, up pale bare legs, forest green skirt, the white laced blouse, her hands crossed across her chest, and the red hair splayed neatly beneath her.

She looked so peaceful as if she was merely asleep.

Surely, this had to be a mistake? It wasn’t the first time she had passed out from hunger.

“Rin-chan…?” He moved closer and closer before kneeling by her motionless form. “Rin-chan, wake up. I have food for you. Look!” He took out the bun he had received from Monokuma and gently nudged her cheek with it.

“Komaeda…” Hinata knelt down beside him with teary eyes. “She’s – “

“Wake up, Rin-chan!” he shouted. He wasn’t listening to anyone. His eyes were only for her. His everything was only for her. “If you don’t wake up… How… How am I supposed to apologise…?”

He laid his head on her chest and stubbornly refuse to go anywhere.

Hinata gritted his teeth, brushing away the tears that kept forming in his eyes. Who would kill her? She never did anything wrong. She wasn’t ever mean to anyone!

All this senseless killing…

He hated this.

But most of all, he hated himself.

He had heard footsteps just outside his door early in the morning. He waited, wondering briefly if it was someone who was here to kill him, but when no one tried to come in, he groggily got up and opened the door. He saw her retreating form. The question of why she was there briefly crossed his mind, but he had been so tired that he just crawled back into bed. If he just followed his instincts at that moment, then she would’ve still been alive.

Watching Komaeda now, the pain magnified. It was heart-wrenching. 

Someone had snapped her neck and posed her body after her death. She was morbidly beautiful as she was – a fiery headed angel who could no longer spread her wings.

“Komaeda, she… She wouldn’t want to see you like this…” he mumbled, unable to keep his voice from crackling.

It was even worse since he could hear Sonia crying

Komaeda shoved him away; his eyes were swirling with madness. It was as if someone else had replaced the snowy-haired boy he had come to know. It was almost like the first class trial again, but worse. The eyes that used to be a cruel amalgamation of hope and despair was quickly losing to the darkness.

He stayed uncharacteristically quiet through the entire investigation time, observing everything the others did while staying close enough to make sure no one disrespected her body.

Once they were done, he wordlessly lifted her into his arms and carried her to Monokuma Rock for the class trial. No one objected, knowing that there was nothing they could’ve said or done to make this right again. Even if they didn’t like him, they knew he needed to grieve.

Saeki Rin had been the one keeping him grounded and now that she was gone, no one knew what he would do next.

Once they arrived, Monokuma greeted them on his usual plush throne, giggling delightfully at their solemn faces. “Puhuhuhuhuhu! This time, the victim is Saeki Rin – the Ultimate Unlucky Student!”

Hinata looked at everyone’s faces. They were all avoiding Komaeda’s direction, but who had the guilty conscience this time?

“I was the first to find her,” he quietly started the conversation, glancing to where she was being carefully cradled in Komaeda’s arms. “I was going down for Monokuma tai Chi just before seven. She was… She was by herself and l-laying as we all found her. I went to look for the others as soon as possible.”

It was difficult to speak. His heart hurt. He never admitted to anyone, but he _did_ like her – he liked her a lot and had hoped that something more could come out of it because Komaeda had also accepted him, but now…

There was only regret.

He should’ve accepted her offer as soon as it came. Maybe things could’ve been different, just like if he had opened the door a little quicker and called out to her…

“I was still in my room during that time and was only woken up when the alarm clocks went off,” Kuzuryu started. “After I managed to turn it off, I went back to bed. Souda and Tanaka were with me.”

Tanaka remained silent, while Souda agreed with him.

“Komaeda, did you hear it?” Hinata asked, looking at the white-haired boy.

Komaeda was unresponsive. His eyes were dark and still swimming with despair. The one who dreamt of hope could see none.

“What about you, Nidai?” he redirected the question to the cyborg who seemed strangely quiet as well.

“Why does it matter if we heard a silly alarm?” Tanaka finally spoke, glaring back at him.

Hinata was surprised at how aggressive the Ultimate Breeder’s tone was. “I only want to understand everything that happened, so we can figure out who killed her.”

“We have to all work together. Any information could be helpful… I think,” Chiaki quietly added.

“I agree.” Sonia nodded, causing Souda to also chime in his support.

Looking around, there really weren’t many of them left. 

Hinata knew he didn’t do it. He was pretty sure it wasn’t Komaeda either or he wouldn’t look so devastated. Besides, with how affectionate the two had been, it seemed unthinkable for him to kill her.

His opinion was not shared by everyone.

“Maybe Komaeda did it! He hasn’t said anything and we all know how crazy he could be!” Souda blurted out. “Besides, they’ve been staying in the same room. It’d be easy for him to kill her!”

They finally all looked at the accused who was in his own world. Every once in a while, he’d mumble something to her – most of them apologies. Even Hinata could see how that could be damning.

“Well? Did you do it, you crazy asshole!” Souda shouted. 

“Komaeda-san?” Sonia quietly pushed. She didn’t want to hurt the mentally fragile individual, but the truth had to come out. There was much at stake.

They waited for a response – anything.

It was hard for all of them to do this, but if they didn’t eliminate the chance of him being the culprit then they were never going to get anywhere.

“Komaeda…” Hinata didn’t want to think that the one he had come to know as a friend – and perhaps even something more – could be capable of something so monstrous. To kill the one he claimed to love?

Nidai clenched his hands. He couldn’t stand by and keep watching them trying to condemn a grieving man. “I did it. I killed Saeki Rin.”

“What?”

Eight pairs of eyes fell on Nidai. Even Komaeda had his eyes on him, but it was almost as if he already knew who the murderer was. He was prepared for this to happen, but it was still nerve-wracking to see all the disbelieving eyes on him – even looking of betrayal. These were his friends, people he swore to protect, but…

Tanaka let out a deep breath when he saw the team manager struggle to find the words to continue. “I headed down to the meeting place for Monokuma Tai Chi after moving everyone’s clock back. I knew Nidai’s internal clock could not be deceived, so I followed him to the Grape House. I was… I was going to kill him, but the Goddess of Mercy appeared.”

“I killed her,” Nidai repeated, finally speaking up again. “We needed to kill to get out. I didn’t mind dying, so I was going to let Tanaka kill me. Instead, Saeki-san came in and asked to take my place. She looked so sad – so broken up… I was the one who could make it as painless as possible, so I…. With my bare hands…”

“That’s no fun…” Monokuma fumed.

Monomi frowned back at him. “Class trials are not supposed to be fun! They are sad and cruel!”

Monokuma smirked deviously at her before punching her hard in the face. Her small body swung violently as she wailed in pain. 

“Vote for me, everyone,” Nidai told them. “I killed Saeki Rin, so I deserve to die for what I’ve done.”

When no one spoke, Monokuma grudgingly started the votes and they all silently voted for their recently returned coach.

“Yeah… Yeah… You guys correctly guessed the blackened…” the bear grumbled.

“I’m sorry, Komaeda,” he apologised, but something still plagued him. “Before I die, tell me why she was so upset – why she looked so lost and devastated.”

Komaeda’s eyes were unreadable. He was a mess. Finally hearing them confirm his fears was too much to ear. Knowing that he was the reason her hope was gone… He might as well have killed her himself.

“I will stop this game,” he whispered, dodging the question. “There will be no more murders. Rin-chan will be the last.”

Hinata was fearful what Komaeda was planning, now. The helplessness was gone, replaced by mad determination. His lips were spread into a wide smile that stretched across his face.

“Komaeda - !”

He was gone before Nidai’s punishment. 

…

So dark…

Where was I?

How is it pitch black everywhere, but I could see still myself so clearly?

How did that make sense?

It didn’t.

Was there just… _nothing_ here?

Then, what was creating the light for me to see myself?

I continued to look myself over in fascination. Every detail was as clear as day.

Confused, I dropped my hands to my side and began to wander.

I walked and walked, hoping to find something – _anything._ How did I even get here? What was I doing?

Where was Koma –

I bent over, holding my head in pain.

Flashes of what happened hit me like an oncoming train.

The yelling…

The fear…

The hate…

The disgust…

The disdain…

The heartbreak…

The despair…

So much despair.

I found Tanaka and Nidai fighting, trying to figure out who should die to save everyone else and I offered myself as sacrifice. It was a win-win situation for us. I wanted to end it all and by doing so, I could save most of them, so… was this the end of the line? Was this the afterlife? Was this Hell?

Ha… maybe this was my bad luck.

Even in death, I was to face an eternity in this void with only my memories to lament over every decision that led me here.

An eternity of thinking about him – the one who had my love and my contempt.

_Komaeda Nagito_.

Every thought of him hurt – both the good and the bad.

I remember all the wonderful times I had with him – the secret smiles and stolen kisses. Feeding him in the old building before I really got to know him and the dark cinema where we kissed for the first time. He even promised to teach me how to swim. I was tempted. Even the Despair Disease that drew us closer together. We were so close to death, but it drew me out of my shell. 

I wanted to be his everything.

For someone who had to live with this curse of misfortune for so long, you’d think I’d have learned my lesson by now. Nothing ever worked out. I always end up with the short end of the stick. 

Komaeda seemed a little unhinged, but he was so kind. He seemed to genuinely like me.

It was all a lie.

He was only with me because he wanted me to be his hope. 

_Hope_ …

I was kind of starting to hate that word. He was so obsessed with it and when he read that we were part of the Ultimate Despair, that was it. He didn’t need to hear anything else from me. I was no longer his hope. I was something even worse than the sand beneath his feet. 

He didn’t want to see me anymore.

Did that mean he never loved me?

To let me go so easily…

It was rather laughable.

I was so naïve.

It was my fault, wasn’t it? I should’ve known better. I had seen his true colours only a day after meeting him. He was a mad man. Not only that, we had only been acquainted for a couple of weeks and I had already given him my everything.

_What a slut…_

I was nothing but a useless slut who could never do anything right.

I hated myself for loving him so completely that it destroyed me to lose him. 

To allow him so much power over me…

_Idiot_.

After meaningless hours of walking and berating myself, I gave up and just laid there in the darkness. It felt as if I was drowning in self-pity. 

I couldn’t recall ever hating myself so much…

Even now, my thoughts kept drifting off to him. It longed for him – his touch, his smile, his kiss, his love. He was so self-deprecating, but it was me who was the pathetic one. I couldn’t even survive a minute without him.

Ha…

“Nagito-kun…” Tears fell down the sides of my face. “Nagito-kun, I love you…”

I loved him so much. I wanted to be with him again. I wanted to wrap myself in his arms and cuddle up close to his chest. I wanted to listen to his heart flutter in his chest and dig my fingers into his fluffy, white hair. 

Just thinking about it made me warm all over. 

“So cruel…” I mumbled. “Nagito-kun… I miss you…”

What if we really were part of the Ultimate Despair? What did Enoshima do to us? What happened at Hope’s Peak for this to happen?

I mean…

I was clearly susceptible to Despair. That in itself was a very despairing thought. 

I laughed pathetically at myself.

How much time had passed? Was it seconds, minutes, hours, days, years?

Nothing ever changed around me, just an endless black, but my thoughts continued to run rampant.

A part of me wondered if I would’ve made the same decision if I wasn’t already on the verge of dying from starvation. Had I been delirious out of my mind before he woke me up? Probably. Would I have done the same any other time? Maybe. That was probably all part of Monokuma’s plan. Even Tanaka and Nidai had been fighting. We were all bound to do something stupid.

As usual, we played right into his slimy paws. 

Stupid bear…

I really hated him.

_“Rin-chan…”_

I froze.

Komaeda?

_“Rin-chan…”_

I sat up and looked around, but he was nowhere to be seen. Was I hallucinating? Even here, I had no way of hiding from him. Had he truly integrated himself so deeply inside me?

_“I’m so sorry… I will make it right…”_

Where was this voice coming from? Could I really be wanting him to apologise to me so badly?

_“No one else will have to die...”_

_“This will be the final one.”_

The darkness suddenly dissolved, revealing a strange, unfamiliar scene before me.

I looked around me to see that I was in some sort of warehouse or factory. It was dark and dirty and smelled of gasoline.

“A-Ah…”

Turning around, I was met with a disturbing sight.

Komaeda?

He was sitting on the concrete floor with his legs spread apart and his ankles tied by thick lengths of rope. With a knife, he began to slash his thighs, gritting his teeth while still grinning like a maniac.

I let out a terrified scream and ran forward to try to stop him, but no matter what I did, I was useless. I couldn’t grab on to anything. “N-No…”

“Haha… Hahaha! This pain… Not even a fraction of what I inflicted on you…” He was still chuckling when he dropped the knife beside him before laying down on his back to tie up his left hand. 

“Stop… Stop…” I begged, shaking helplessly by his body.

He may have broken my heart, but I didn’t want him to die and I definitely didn’t want him to mutilate himself. I wanted so desperately to stop him, but I didn’t know how. This was so terrible…

Komaeda…

“Haha… HAHAHAHAHA!” Utter glee suddenly filled his eyes. “Ah… Rin-chan… Rin-chan… I’ll be joining you, soon…” He shakily reached over to slowly pull on another rope.

A glint in the darkness caught my eyes and I followed it to see a spear rising off from the floor and swinging dangerously above him.

_No…_

“Allow me to grovel for your forgiveness. Allow me to have an eternity to make it up to you…” Tears trailed down the side of his face. “Rin-chan… ‘Love you… So much… Let me see you, again, Rin-chan…”

“Don’t do this, Nagito-kun! Make it up to me later! Make it up to me by living and becoming a better person! Love yourself. _Please_!” I cried, hovering over his broken body.

“Rin-chan…?” With his right hand, he reached towards me and his eyes were trained on mine. Was it possible that he could see me?

“I’m here! I’m here, so stop being stupid! I forgive you, okay?! I forgive you!” I wanted to touch him so badly. “And… And… I told you to treat yourself better! D-Don’t… D-Don’t die…”

“Ah… Rin-chan… You’re so beautiful…” His hand went through me. “Hah… That’s right… I no longer deserve to touch you… I’ve… betrayed your trust. I’ve betrayed your love… Your hope… I had done that to you – snuffed out that hope and replaced it with despair. This is only the… first step of my plan to find… redemption...

“It would be far too arrogant of me to ask you to wait for me, but I… I’m very happy to see you… Even if you’re not real… Even if it’s something my rotting brain conjured… To see you one last time…

“Watch, Rin-chan… This will be glorious. I will end this game and with my luck… Hope shall triumph,” he sighed happily. He shakily taped up his mouth and began to juggle the knife, placing it into his left hand. 

With a deep breath, he slammed his right hand into the blade, piercing right through the flesh with little resistance. The gasp of pain was followed by a string of muffled giggles. It appeared as if he wanted to say something more, but the duct tape held on tight.

I stayed with him as the blood splattered everywhere and was startled by the sound of a door bursting open.

Suddenly, the room was engulfed in flames, surging up the black curtains. Was that part of his plan as well?!

I could hear Hinata and everyone else standing just outside, shouting to each other before their voices faded into the distance.

“No! Come back!” I tried to run after them, but I immediately hit an invisible wall. “Hinata-kun! Hinata-kun! He’s here! Help him! Please, help him!”

Fortunately, it wasn’t long before they returned, tossing fire grenades at the high flames. There was so much smoke, but also another sort of gas that didn’t smell… quite right…

“Ngh!”

I gasped, turning back to see pain covering his face. His back arched, but he could barely move an inch off the floor.

“Nagito-kun!”

The light in his eyes faded, frozen in pain and the rope in his hand fell, striking his body with the spear.

The image of his broken body was the last thing I saw before everything was consumed by darkness, once more.

“No!” I screamed. “No! Give him back to me! What kind of sick joke is this?! Let me out of here! Please! _Please_ …”

It didn’t matter.

My words meant nothing here.

I was powerless.

I fell…

And fell…

Deeper…

Deeper into despair…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> O_O I'm still sorry... !!!!!!!
> 
> Side note: Komaeda's death was the saddest for me among the three games because I was so emotionally attached to him. A close second would be that one character from Danganronpa v3 Chapter 5 (not the one voted out).


	14. Chapter 14

Hinata pressed the button, watching as everything began to break down from all around him.

This Neo World Program… 

It was finally over and he was going to make sure all of his friends woke up. He wasn’t going to give up. He was never going to give up on any of them

Rin…

Komaeda…

He was determine.

He _knew_ he could do it.

When his eyes fluttered open, he felt disoriented as if he had been transported into another body. He didn’t feel like himself. Was it because of Kamukura Izuru? Strange how this other consciousness had been in him this entire time, but he couldn’t recall any of it.

He pushed against the green glass above him, until it released with a long _hiss_.

Where was he? His memories were groggy as if he was still trying to differentiate what was real and what was from the Neo World Program.

Sitting up, he realised that his head was heavier than usual. He reached up and began to freak out when he couldn’t feel his ahoge. Instead, he had long, long locks that just didn’t end. They pooled around his body like an inky abyss.

Quickly, he stumbled out, feeling the hair fall with him and looked around. There were pods set up in a circle, each one identical to the one he had been in.

Several were opening, revealing Sonia, Souda, Owari, Tanaka, and Kuzuryu. Immediately, they hugged each other, relieved to be alive and no longer caught in the Killing Game. They spoke animatedly as if this was a direct continuation from the other world with no interruptions, but there _were_ changes. They weren’t the same people as their avatars, but they also weren’t ht people before that. Somehow, through sheer luck, they managed to merge and become both.

It was a mixed blessing because that meant they would remember how their friends died and how they were willing to kill for survival. They could also remember how the world had collapsed after the worst tragedy of human history and the despair each of them brought.

Hinata, himself, couldn’t recall anything between accepting the Kamukura Project and the Neo World Program, but he heard enough from the others to know that they were indeed the Remnants of Despair, having directly and indirectly killed hundreds of thousands of people.

All for Despair…

Because of _her_.

Enoshima Junko.

Shaking his head, he walked around and found Komaeda’s pod first. He looked more emancipated than his avatar. The paleface was punctuated by hollow cheeks. It was almost as if he was truly dead. Not only that, he had cut off his left arm and crudely bandaged Enoshima’s in its place. The perfectly manicured fingernails looked out of place.

Komaeda Nagito was the Ultimate Lucky Student. There was no way the snow-haired boy – no, man – wouldn’t wake. It was so strange to see them all looking older than they actually felt. Both the past and the Neo were fighting to resume control despite both being real and not mutually exclusive.

“You have to wake up,” he whispered, casting him one more place before moving on.

Mioda, Pekoyama, Saionji, Hanamura…

He stopped at the sight of long red hair.

She looked just as peaceful as when she died. Her hair framed her body like red roses. It stopped just past her hips, looking at least a foot longer than her avatar’s. Was she going to wake up? They came out knowing that there would be a risk that the dead may never wake, but he had to hope that it would all turn out alright. Besides, now that he knew he was infused with so many talents... His luck had to mean something, right?

Kamukura Izuru had to be good for something…

He clenched his hands into tight fists.

He had to hope that despair would never win.

“Rin…” He placed his hand on the thicken glass. ‘When you wake up, I have so much to say to you. Both me and… and… Kamukura…” It was strange uttering the name. Kamukura was suddenly more real than ever and although they had “merged” together, it still felt as if he was a separate entity.

He didn’t have full access of the other’s memories, but there was enough for him to know that Kamukura and Rin had history together. It was all he had for the years he missed. It was as if he was living a dream, weaving in and out of Kamukura’s existence with only several moments of lucidness . After that, there was only the Neo World.

“Open your eyes. Don’t give me this hope only to take it all away and… you can’t do this to Komaeda.” The other man scared him. The deep madness that swirled in those faded green eyes… Even at death, frozen in pain, sadness, despair. “He is lost without you and so am I. Please, just wake up…”

No amount of hoping or pleading or crying worked.

He was frustrated at himself – so frustrated with how things turned out. 

“Hinata...” Kuzuryu stopped behind him and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Come on, let’s get some fresh air.”

He didn’t want to leave them. He wanted to stay until their eyes finally opened. He wanted to be there when they woke up!

“It’ll take time. You’ll need food after waking up,” the yakuza continued, slowly steering him away and he numbly followed.

Outside, someone was waiting for them. He was a rather short brunet with hopeful eyes and a bright smile – Naegi Makoto. He was one of the three from the Future Foundation who saved them at the end when Enoshima was slowly worming her doubts and despairs into their brains.

“I’m so glad you’re awake!” he exclaimed, walking towards them. “But I knew that you guys were strong, especially to survive the Killing Game.”

“The others will also wake up,” Sonia firmly told him.

Naegi nodded. “That’s the spirit. You guys should follow me. Togami had some food prepared for all of you and Kirigiri is uh… around somewhere.”

They followed him to the restaurant, a familiar scene with unfamiliar people. 

It was surreal to think that this was the real world version of Jabberwock Island and everything was almost identical to what they were used to.

“Took you long enough.” The Togami standing before them was the one from the first Hope’s Peak Academy information book that Monokuma game him. He was arrogant and seemed to only want to be here because of obligation, unlike the Togami imposter who would put his life down for them.

Naegi laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Eat whatever you want,” he told them. “You guys must all be starving!”

The food did smell good, but Hinata didn’t have much of an appetite. His stomach felt as if it was made of lead and all he could do was poke at his scrambled eggs. How could anyone go back to normal after experiencing something like that?

He ran his hand down his long hair.

“Man, you look like a girl, now!” Souda laughed. “Doesn’t he, Miss Sonia?”

Sonia looked away from Tanaka to give Hinata a scrutinising stare. “I think it takes much courage and much confidence in one’s masculinity. I am also jealous of how beautiful and healthy his hair looks.”

“Huh? Miss Sonia…?” Souda looked sadly at the princess who turned her attention back on the Ultimate Breeder.

“Just shut up and eat!” Kuzuryu retorted, already tired of the drama.

Surprisingly, Owari was also pushing her food around. Unlike her avatar, her current appearance was rather emancipated and although she seemed to want to eat, there was something else stopping her.

“Are you okay, Owari?” he asked.

“Huh? Of course! Why wouldn’t I be?” Owari tried to smile at him, but it was lackluster and her eyes turned downcast once more.

“You’re not eating,” he quietly stated.

With a wide smile, she began to shovel food into her mouth. “I don’t know what you’re talking about! Look, I’m…” Her face turned green and she immediately gagged and before she could even get up, the food came back out on to the floor. All she managed to do was turn her head so the content wouldn’t hit the food, but the smell already ruined everyone’s appetite.

Sonia immediately held her hair to the side and rubbed her back in a comforting manner. “Owari-san, please don’t overdo it. You must gradually build up an appetite again after not eating solid food for so long.”

Once Owari was done, she wiped her mouth with the back of her shaking hand. “It… It’s not that… Before… Before the other place, I was starving myself because I hated what I saw… I hated myself so much that I stopped eating and…”

Sonia hugged her from behind. “It’s alright to feel this way, Owari-san. I, too, have done much I am not proud of. After returning to my country of Novoselic, I… I helped spread despair to everyone. I had given orders to kill many with the artilleries we were privy to. I am not proud of what I had done, but… I know I cannot go back in time. Perhaps if I am better and my country accepts me back, I will try my very best to help them rebuild.”

“Miss Sonia…” Souda looked down. “I was not much better. I made many weapons and robots to wreck havoc. I don’t even know how many people were killed because of my inventions…”

“’Tis true… With the darkness shrouding my eyes, I summoned many evil spirits to vanquish everything in their paths…” Tanaka sighed. He looked strange without his small army of hamsters. No one knew what happened to them, but they assumed that they never made it through the tragedy.

Kuzuryu huffed. “At least none of you had _her_ eye in their skull…”

The remark made everyone crack a small smile.

“Do you feel him, Hinata-san?” Sonia asked, tilting her head. “The other one in your head – Kamukura Izuru.”

“I…” Hinata wasn’t sure. He _did_ feel a little different, but it wasn’t that drastic. The thing that bothered him the most was his hair and when he touched his face… He could feel the ridges of scars near his scalp. That was probably where those people had operated on him to somehow insert Kamukura into his body. He really wasn’t sure how they managed that. “I don’t know… I think he’s still in there…”

Sonia nodded with a thoughtful look on her face, realizing that he didn’t wish to speak about it any further and respected his privacy. 

After eating, Naegi let them run off, trusting them enough to go on their own. While the others headed to the cottages to reclaim what they had in the Neo World Program, Hinata returned to the dark chamber.

He sat down by Rin’s pod and rested his head against the side. “Wake up… Please, wake up.”

His pleas fell to deaf ears.

One by one over the next several weeks, his other friends began to arouse from the Neo World Program – Koizumi, Mioda, Nidai, Togami Imposter, Saionji, Hanamura, Tsumiki, and Pekoyama.

All of them woke up, but not the two he was waiting for. Was it too selfish of him – to wish that the two he was waiting for would wake up first instead?

He just couldn’t understand why they wouldn’t wake up.

_Why?!_

They had both always been strange and unnaturally attached to each other. Were they together, now? Had they left him behind?

The thoughts ran rampant in his brain as he remained with them for all hours of the day and all through the night, only eating when Kuzuryu would bring a plate of food over.

All sorts of memories and regrets assaulted him. He remembered his first crush – Nanami. The Ultimate Gamer, someone from the Main Course, who actually spoke with a Reserve Course student like him. She genuinely seemed to enjoy his company. He really wanted to be worthy of her attention. He wished that he could’ve been stronger and realised that he didn’t need to change to be with her. He just needed to accept himself the way he was because that was how she liked him. 

A soft touch of an apology brushed his mind.

Kamukura.

A half sob escaped his lips.

What good was that, now? 

Kamukura Izuru was part of the reason why Nanami died. He helped Enoshima with her quest for despair and in one fell swoop, captured the Class of 77-B. He helped bring them to despair by killing their class representative. He caught a flash of her broken body, the eyes that begged for Hinata to come back out, her wish for him to play just one last game, the pleas for him to be her friend, again. He had failed her.

Hinata didn’t know the exact details of everything, but he remembered the image of her clearly – having it burnt into his mind’s eyes. Some of the other blanks were filled by what he heard from the others. They were well aware of all the evil his alter ego had caused. The so-called Ultimate Hope had been the one to make Enoshima’s sick fantasies possible.

He hated Kamukura Izuru.

He wished that he was never offered the chance to become an Ultimate – to have talents. 

He wished that he hadn’t been so selfish.

How much could’ve changed if he was just satisfied with himself?

How much time had he lost to Kamukura?

_But I found Saeki Rin._

Huh?

Was that…?

A memory was suddenly pushed into the forefront of his mind.


	15. Chapter 15

I cursed myself, looking frantically for the notebook I was certain I had dropped in the school yard, but it was nowhere to be found.

Maybe it was inside…?

I looked around, making sure that there was no security in the area. It always baffled me that Hope’s Peak had actual security patrolling the halls at night. What were they hiding? My notebook? 

I rolled my eyes at the ridiculous train thoughts. This was a school of Ultimate talents. There had to be some sort of top secret somewhere or maybe they were just afraid that the Ultimates were going to be causing trouble. That was more than likely… I still remember the time where Tanaka brought a bear into the classroom and when Owari and Nidai decided to fight… They effective took out most of the outer wall.

Whatever…

I just really needed my notebook!

As I huffed and puffed from frustration and exhaustion, my heart suddenly fell when there was a loud _crack_ and suddenly, my feet were no longer touching the floor. Instead, gravity had me in its greedy grasp.

I was falling and falling, until I hit something that didn’t make me go _splat_!

I opened my clenched eyes to immediately be greeted by piercing red robs. “Huh…? I’m… alive…”

The boy – man? – who caught me didn’t say a word and merely observed me. It was unnerving. 

“Th-Thank you…” My brain was slowly melting as I tried to figure out what just happened. “Where am I?”

He looked up and I followed his motion to see the hole in the ceiling.

Right.

I was looking for my notebook and suddenly, I fell through the floor. Why was I still surprised? This wasn’t even the first floor I had fallen through.

“Sorry about your… um… room?” I wasn’t really sure where I was still. Sure, I was somewhere beneath the school, but what was this place? Was this a room or a cell? If it was a cell, should I be worried about this person? If this was a bedroom, should I be worried _for_ t his person? 

I had been half joking when I thought about secrets of Hope’s Peak, but this definitely seemed like a secret they didn’t want anyone to know about. There had to be a reason why they were hiding him h –

I froze and blinked several times. I squinted my eyes as I tried to figure out why this person looked so familiar. There was something about the face structure and…

I shamelessly placed my hand on his cheek. “… Hinata…kun…?”

This person resembled the Reserve Course student I had seen hanging out with Nanami. They seemed close and she was really upset when one day, he just ditched her.

Was he a relative or could be somehow be…?

My fingers trailed over to his long locks, tangling one around my hand. A soft blush painted my cheeks. “So soft…” I sighed. I was jealous. I was trying to grow out my hair, but it would never be as soft or luscious as his. What was his secret?

“Honestly! What have you been eating? Your breath really stinks!” came a muffled noise just beyond the only door in the room. It was almost overwhelmingly obnoxious.

“Hide.”

The command was absolute. He let me down and I frantically looked for a place to conceal myself, but the room was completely bare, except for a small cot.

I quickly crouched behind it, peeking up to see him sit down on the lumpy mattress. His hair tumbled over the edge, tickling my nose. It smelled like generic soap.

“There he is!” That voice was really grating on my nerves.

I watched quietly as a strawberry blonde and a dark haired girl storm in. The blonde had a wide grin on her face as she confidently strolled up to the strange male, but was promptly taken down – her face crushed by the heel of his shoes. The brunette immediately ran over to try to help, but before she could even raise her weapon, he backhanded her. She crashed into the wall and crumbled on to the floor.

Somehow, I managed to keep quiet, pressing my hand tightly over my mouth, but I was still shocked over what occurred within five seconds. How had he done it? Every motion was a blur.

I looked over to the two girls again and realised that they looked kind of familiar. They were freshmens to Hope’s Peak Academy. I didn’t know what their talents were, but it didn’t seem as if they were supposed to be here, either.

“Haha…” the blonde laughed with drool trailing down the side of her face.

Her eyes slowly rolled over to me from beneath the bed. The blue orbs were wide with excitement. Her choked laughter continued to fill the concrete room.

“Who… are… you…?” she forced out while having her head pressed down harder against the floor. “Does the great… Kamu… kura… Izuru… have a dirty… secret?”

Kamukura Izuru.

Not Hinata, then?

Kamukura merely grind his heel harder against her face. I was actually afraid he was going to break a bone if he didn’t let up.

“We have to go!” the brunette shouted, scrambling to her feet after being woken up by alerted guards from outside. She looked urgently at the door they had burst through.

I was probably going to be shot down on sight.

What a way to go…

And all I wanted was to find my notebook.

How did it end up like this, again?

Kamukura hummed before rendering the blonde unconscious.

Her companion quickly whisked her away, leaving me still stranded. There was no way I was going to follow them even if they end up getting away. They were absolutely insane!

Suddenly, I was lifted into his arms. The position already feeling a little familiar after the second time. “W-Who are you…?”

“They named me Kamukura Izuru.” That didn’t help because I already found out that much from the ruckus, but I wondered if he even knew the answer to that question. “Now, quiet.”

I clamped my mouth shut as he leapt up and somehow managed to kick off against the wall with enough momentum to carry us out through the hole in the ceiling.

“Are you going to come with me?” I asked once he set me down. 

If he was a prisoner, I saw no reason why he wouldn’t escape. It would be the only logical thing to do. Then again, he could’ve done that earlier, too, but he didn’t.

As expected, he shook his head. “Not now… That would be boring.”

Huh?

He leaned over and picked up something from the floor.

Not now?

Boring?

I couldn’t see how being stuck in a small room was more entertaining than exploring all the other things the world had to offer.

“Do not fall through anymore ceilings.” With that, he jumped down the hole, leaving a familiar book by my feet.

“Kamukura-kun…” I whispered, picking up the offending object that had put me into this scenario in the first place.

…

The memory hit him hard. It was as if he was watching a movie. Everyone was moving and talking, but he had only an inkling what was going to happen next.

_She was mine_.

Possession… Kamukura was surprisingly possessive for someone who seemed so detached to everything else. The other entity enjoyed being an observer, despite making one particular decision to help Enoshima Junko that changed the entire course of the future. 

“Yeah, well… You didn’t take very good care of her, did you?” Hinata spitefully mumbled back. Look at her, on the edge of life and death. “What good are you, now?”

Kamukura was predictably silent, again.

“Hinata-san?” Sonia sat down beside him with a mug of hot chocolate. “Here. I believe this may lift your mood. Sweet things always make me feel better.”

He accepted the kindness and took a sip. Warmth spread through his body. He hadn’t realised how cold he was until now. “Thanks.”

The princess looked worriedly at him. “Come out, just for a little while. The others are all concerned of your well being.”

“If not, we’ll all crowd around you, until you’re tired of us.” Kuzuryu smirked, standing by the doorway, backed up by all of his other friends.

Hinata wiped at his misty eyes.

How did he get so lucky to end up with such wonderful friends? 

All his life, he thought he was never good enough and that was why he… he…

One question kept plaguing him over and over again.

Would things have turned out differently if he hadn’t accepted the offer?

Perhaps despair wouldn’t have won without Kamukura.

Cheerfully, his friends sat around him, returning to the chamber where they were comatose, trapped in the Neo World Program. He knew how much they hated it here, but to still stay in this room with him… 

He truly was fortunate, wasn’t he?

“Just these two left, huh?” Souda muttered, scratching the back of his neck. “Isn’t Komaeda supposed to be the lucky one?”

“THEY JUST NEED A GOOD SHAKE TO WAKE UP!” Nidai shouted. “HOW DARE THEY SLEEP IN?”

“Quiet down!” Koizumi huffed, rolling her eyes when Owari joined in on the pep talk.

“So noisy!” Saionji whined.

Hanamura grinned lecherously while gazing at Rin. “I wonder what she’s dreaming about? It must be something good if she refuses to wake up. Maybe it’s my long, thick d – “

Koizumi punched him in the face. 

“What are you lot doing now – creating such a racket?” The real Togami Byakuya looked less than impressed by their display of unity.

“Let them be,” Kirigiri stated, leaning against the wall.

Naegi laughed at his friends’ antics. “How are you guys doing, today?”

The trio had stayed with them for the first few days since they woke up to evaluate their conditions. After they deemed them well enough, the Future Foundation needed them elsewhere, but they still visited every once in a while to drop off supplies and to make sure they were all alright.

There was still concern that any of them could relapse and fall into despair once more. The Neo World Program was not infallible. Junko’s despair had been so deeply engraved in them that the possibility may always be present.

Hinata hated to think about it, but the Future Foundation suspected that the virus in the Program was also caused by _him_.

…

He slid in, pumping quickly into me without leaving time to breathe. He felt so good…

“Ha… N-Nagito-kun!” I cried, holding him close. I wanted to melt into him. I didn’t ever want to be without him. 

He giggled into my neck. “Rin-chan…”

I didn’t want him to leave. I didn’t want him to go to those stupid kids. Warriors of Hope? What a joke. They were merely poor imitations of _her_.

My sharp gasps filled the room. How long before I would be able to see him, again?

He was still so obsessed with her, even if it’s hate, I wanted all of his attention. I wanted to burn the gloved hand that had replaced his. Enoshima Junko and her ugly red finger nails…

I hated it.

I hated her so, so much.

“Stay with me, Nagi…” I moaned, running my hand through his hair, hoping he would cave. “Love me, Nagito-kun. Say you love me and won’t leave.”

He licked a trail up my neck to whisper into my ears. “I am truly, deeply in love with you, Rin-chan.”

I whimpered, arching into him further, pushing him further into me. “A-Ah! Y-Yes… More. More!”

Just then, the door quietly creaked open, revealing our third.

He watched with an almost detached look on his face s we never faltered in our practised dance.

“Izuru-sama…!” I reached out to him with one needy hand. “’Zuru-sama…”

He walked over, keeping his red eyes trained on mine. His trousers were left behind, but he kept his black suit on. He knew how much I loved it on him. He looked so good… He was so beautiful…

His hand stroked up and down his length several times before nudging my mouth with his half-erect member. I happily welcomed him in, letting him control how far it went.

I wanted them to use me. I wanted them to take me as hard and as rough as they wanted.

I moaned and mewed, loving them both inside me at the same time. They always made me feel so good. I needed to make them feel as good as they made me.

My eyes began to flutter as they quickened their pace; losing the well practised rhythm they were comfortable with.

Komaeda slammed himself one more time inside me before spilling his hot seed into my body.

“Ngh~!” I moaned around the thick length in my mouth.

Kamukura tugged at my hair, angling my throat to take him in completely. It was getting harder to breathe, pressed so closely against his body, but I wanted his cum. I wanted it to spill inside my belly, so I happy hummed and moving my tongue beneath him.

He let out a low groan, tilting his head up as his cock jerked with each spurt.

He slid out of me, leaving a long trail of cum and saliva to connect us.

It felt so good.

Why couldn’t we be like this forever?

Komaeda and I began to cuddle beneath the covers, while Kamukura shed the rest of his clothes before sliding in behind me. His body was warmer than Komaeda’s, putting me in a comfortable equilibrium.

I shifted slightly, moving Kamukura’s long locks on to my body before running the ends over Komaeda’s.

My snowy-haired lover panted, easily aroused once more as he stared adoringly at us with a rosy flush on his face. His dreamy smile made me kiss him. So pretty…

I moved the lock of hair to brush along his length, watching him let out a cry and squirm. 

“R-Rin-chan…!” he gasped. “Stop teasing…”

Kamukura reached over my shoulder and grabbed Komaeda’s hair, tugging him roughly forward.

I had front row seats of the heady kiss that left me hot and wanting. I was the one squirming now, wiggling my butt to bump against Kamukura’s cock. I could feel it hardening and poking me back.

He let Komaeda go and managed to turn my head to pull me into a deep kiss. I could feel Komaeda’s chilly hands wandering around my body, flicking my nipples, and causing me to gasp. His snowy head disappeared beneath the covers and I could feel his lips wrap around the left peak.

Kamukura lifted my right leg and slid his cock along my slit, until he was lubricated enough to probe my puckered hole.

“Ngh…” I pushed back, opening myself enough to pop the head in. “Ha… Feels so good…”

I broke away to peer beneath the blanket to see Komaeda slide further down and began to lick the point of connection, leaving us all breathless.

“N-Nagito-kun…” Seeing him like this was almost too much.

When he flicked his tongue several times over the bundle of nerves between my legs, I was gone.

I clenched tightly around Kamukura as a scream tore through out of my throat.

Komaeda popped back out, sliding himself into my quivering tunnel. I was too sensitive for this, but they began to move in unison, using me as they saw fit. They witnessed me at my lowest – depraved and begging.

They took me over the edge again and again. I was a mess. My mind was a puddle, only able to focus on what they were doing to me. I had no coherent thoughts.

“One more,” Kamukura murmured into my ears.

His command was absolute. My body performed for him, screaming everything, allowing it to burst out and leave me boneless and weaving in and out of consciousness.

I could vaguely hear Komaeda’s drunken giggles and Kamukura’s content hums.

This was happiness.

This was absolute happiness.

This was luck and hope that I never thought I would ever feel, especially after what happened with _her_.

The Ultimate Despair…

She strived to break us all, but the three of us managed to cling on to a shred of sanity. It was the only reason why we hadn’t dissolved into homicidal maniacs.

Alone, I wasn’t sure if we’d ever manage.

Maybe Kamukura-sama…

He was amazing.

So full of hope and light…

I still remembered when he saved me from her grasp.

Their disgusting hands all over my body…

Kamukura-sama…

…

Hinata’s eyes snapped open. When had he fallen asleep? And… were those Kamukura’s memories of before? Not only had he been intimate with Rin, he had also been exceptionally close to Komaeda.

The typically stoic entity had been content and accepted the duo’s smothering affection. Was there a chance that they could still have that?

But he wasn’t Kamukura.

He wasn’t talented or extraordinary.

He was painfully normal Hinata Hajime.

No, that wasn’t quite right. He was still able to access some of Kamukura’s talents.

That didn’t mean they’d want him, though.

Then again, he’d be happy if they would just wake up.

The cynical side of him was screaming.

He was waiting for two dead people to come back.

No, he couldn’t think this way. They were going to wake up. Everyone else did. They had to, too, because it wouldn’t be fair otherwise.

But had life ever been fair?

Would he even be happy if only Komaeda woke up? He wasn’t sure. There was a fifty-fifty chance of whether he woke up or not, depending on his luck cycle.

Rin, however… She had no luck at all. The fact that she even managed to stay alive so long was because of Komaeda and Kamukura. They were there to catch her every time she fell or something was about to fall on her. He could still remember the time where she nearly drowned when the ever excited Mioda accidentally pushed her into the pool.

Komaeda had jumped in without a second thought and pulled her up. 

Hinata wished that he could’ve done more for them. Would things have been different or would they still have taken their own lives? It was as if one couldn’t live without the other.

They had both left him behind…

So cruel…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just some backstory. Heh...


	16. Chapter 16

His entire life, Hinata Hajime had always felt like he wasn’t good enough for anyone, but after the Neo World Program, he realised that he had been acting like a fool – idolizing the Main Course students instead of trying to understand them properly. Even Nanami…

He loved spending time with her, just gaming and laughing. It was the most fun he ever had and she had been so kind. Yet, his own insecurities kept telling him that he wasn’t good enough. Nanami would never truly be happy with such a useless, untalented being such as himself. 

But he had been proven wrong, hadn’t he? 

In the Neo World Program, no one knew he didn’t have a talent and no one really cared. They didn’t except anything extraordinary from him, only whatever he could offer and they liked him. He had gained everyone’s trust and friendship. These Ultimates who used to feel so out of reach for him was now in the same situation and they… they _cared_ for him.

Komaeda was the only odd ball. He hadn’t been particularly liked by anyone despite being an Ultimate. He didn’t even like himself. Despite this, the Ultimate Lucky student had been the only to question his talent, his integrity, his loyalty. 

And funnily enough, Hinata didn’t think Komaeda really cared deep inside because there were moments they had together where it felt as if they were as close as close could be. He couldn’t tell if it was because of Rin and Komaeda merely indulging her, but he really wanted to believe that they had something special.

“They’re not going to wake up. Spending time coming and going from here is a completely waste of time for everyone. We have better things to do!”

Hinata stopped right beside the old warehouse to eavesdrop on the Future Foundation. They were clearly arguing and Togami sounded irritated, perhaps even angry.

“I have hope that they _will_ wake up. If you want to leave, no one is stopping you, but I’m going to give up!” Naegi shouted back.

The Ultimate Affluent Progeny scoffed. “Do as you please. I have more important places to be than to babysit and I will not be covering for you anymore when they ask what you are doing.”

Kirigiri had been silently listening in up until now. “Naegi, I will go back as well. I agree with you that our presence will help them, but this is a waiting game. Our world is still recovering. I will still visit and return in a week’s time.”

A look of hurt flashed across Naegi’s face and he quickly turned to hide it. “That’s fine.”

She placed her gloved hand on his shoulder. “You know I admire your hope. I will support you no matter what.”

When he didn’t reply, she sighed and walked away.

Hinata waited a minute before approaching Naegi. “Are you… okay?”

“I’m fine.” Naegi discreetly wiped his eyes before turning to him with the fakest, widest smile he had ever seen. “I’m sorry you had to hear that, but believe me when I tell you that I’m not giving up! Hope is what defeated despair, so I am certain that they will wake up!”

Hinata smiled with a small frown on his face. “I’m… _We’re_ really glad you’re here. Because of you guys, we’re able to have a second chance and I’m able to be Hinata Hajime, again.”

Naegi’s smile became more genuine. “I’m glad and don’t worry, I won’t rest until both Komaeda Nagito and Saeki Rin wake up.”

…

How much time had passed?

Since being forced to watch Komaeda die, I was thrust back into the darkness and been there ever since.

I couldn’t stop picturing his final moment. All the blood, the pain, and that look on his face…

Why?

Didn’t he know that by doing that to himself, he was only hurting me more?

It didn’t matter that his words contributed to _my_ decision, Komaeda should’ve… He should’ve just known better! 

I was being such a hypocrite. I expected him to be stronger when I so readily gave up. The hunger and desperation made me vulnerable. I was already on the verge of despair with how hopeless everything seemed and seeing Tanaka and Nidai fight, it just seemed like the perfect opportunity to do good.

Was it my fault that Komaeda killed himself?

The last things he said had all been directed to me. His last thoughts were of the built and regret he had. I wished he could’ve remembered our happy times instead.

I had made a mistake by leaving him. I should’ve known better than to give up. It was all Monokuma’s fault. He no doubt knew that of all people, Komaeda would be the most affected by that book – the information on the Ultimate Despair; the information on them.

The Ultimate Despair…

I was also a part of that according to the book, but I couldn’t remember any of it. My last memory before the island was being accepted to Hope’s Peak Academy, but nothing actually involved in it.

What did that all mean? Why were we on Jabberwock Island? It couldn’t possibly be because of a “field trip.” How did we even get there? Who was Monomi and who was behind her?

Why didn’t anything make sense?!

…

“Are you sure you want to do this? It’s risky. You could get stuck and never wake up,” Naegi informed him as he readied to enter the green pod once more.

“I’m sure. Besides, even if my talents are artificial, I still have them.” He was never able to really put them to good use as himself, except at the end of the Neo World Program. He could do this. He had to.

Naegi nodded. “While you do that, I’m going to try to gain access to Saeki-san’s mind, again., hopefully by the time you return. Good luck and talk to you, soon.”

Hinata nodded back before lying down and closing his eyes. “I’m ready.”

One moment he was in the large room, the next, he was standing on an ordinary street. In fact, he recognized this place. He wasn’t too far from Hope’s Peak Academy!

Why was he here? For some reason, the thought he would be sent back to Jabberwock Island, but he guessed that wouldn’t make any sense. The world they were in had collapsed. This was supposed to be Komaeda’s consciousness made accessible by the Program.

As he took a deep breath, he froze. Something felt strange. Something was missing.

He never felt this during the first time he was in the Program, but now…

_Kamukura?_

The other entity wasn’t there.

And his hair… It was short, again!

What did that mean?

He shook his head. That wasn’t important right now. He had to find Komaeda!

Where would someone like him be? He didn’t really know Komaeda before Jabberwock Island and Kamukura seemed to have completely disappeared. His only lead was Hope’s Peak – the tower that seemed to rise high into the clouds.

He made his way there. Almost everyone was faceless. Was this because Komaeda didn’t know them or was it because _he_ didn’t know them?

At the fountain, he froze. A familiar form was sitting on the ledge with her handheld game console.

Nanami…

Without him knowing, tears began to stream down his face. “Nanami!” He ran to the quiet girl who looked up to him.

Her head tilted to the side. “Hi, Hinata-kun.”

He pulled her into a tight hug and cried in her arms. “How… I thought I was in Komaeda’s head…?”

“You are… I think… But this is also still using the Neo World Program. Everything Komaeda is projecting is here and since I was incorporated into the program, I will continue to exist,” she explained.

“I-I’m sorry, Nanami. I shouldn’t have ever left you… I shouldn’t have allowed envy and greed to change me.” Even though Kamukura had been the one in control after the conversion, he had seen a glimpse of Nanami’s broken body. He had felt her small 8-bit hair clip in his hand.

Nanami was dead because he couldn’t save her.

_“Just one more game… Please… Hinata-kun…”_

Her desperate tone had shattered him and he retreated back into himself, unable to face the repercussions of his decisions. It was better for Kamukura to keep the body. He wasn’t making any good use of it anyway.

Nanami sighed. “It’s not your fault, Hinata-kun. I may not be the Chiaki you know, but if I was created based on her, then I know for certain that she would’ve forgiven you and told you that you need to forgive yourself, now.”

He could imagine that exactly. Nanami was kind to a fault. She trusted and loved too easily, but to forgive himself? That was going to take some time.

“No, go kind Komaeda-kun, okay?”

Hinata nodded.

He raced into the building where there were several distinct faces, but no one he knew. Where would he be here? What class was he in, again?

Class…

Class 77… B?

But where was that? 

Suddenly, a sound of a vending machine caught his attention. He rounded a corner to see someone bend over to retrieve a… dozen cans of Dr. Hopper? “K-Komaeda?!”

“Huh?” Komaeda turned. His face was a little softer – younger. His eyes were void of madness.

Hinata quickly closed the distance between them and pulled the younger boy into his arms. This was the Komaeda before Enoshima – the hope-loving fool before he was attacked by despair.

“A-Ah…” Komaeda didn’t know what to do. He hadn’t expected to be embraced by a stranger, but it was nice… warm… He really liked this person’s hug, so he hugged him back. He blushed, nuzzling the touchy boy.

The brunet stepped back to see the look of adoration stare back at him. He never thought that he’d be so glad to see Komaeda, but he was and his heart was pounding wildly in his chest.

“It makes me happy to know that even trash like me can be held so tenderly by someone so full of hope…” Komaeda sighed, hugging himself, as a small trail of drool ran down his chin. 

“S-Stop with that, again!” Hinata knew his face was flushed red. He didn’t mean to come on so strong, but he had been so excited to find him! “Come on. We need you to wake up! Rin is waiting for us!”

Komaeda blinked in confusion. “Rin?”

“Yes! She’s also stuck and won’t wake up!” Hinata felt the urgency once more as he reeled himself back to focus on the mission.

“I’m not sure what you’re talking about, but why would Saeki-san be waiting for me? I am no one special. She has better things to do than – “

“Wait…” Hinata froze as horror slowly filled him. Saeki-san? Since when did Komaeda refer to Rin by her last name? “Do you know who I am?”

“You’re the hopeful soul who took pity on – “

“No! I’m Hinata Hajime! We were stuck in the Neo World Program together! You were m – my partner in crime and Rin… Rin loves you!” This couldn’t be happening… Why couldn’t Komaeda remember anything?!

Komaeda laughed. “Oh, I get it now. T his is a joke, isn’t it?” He looked around in search of hidden figures. “If this is another prank, I will play along.”

“It’s not!” How could Hinata prove to him that he was being sincere? “R-Rin… Rin-chan really loves you. She can’t wake up, right now, but if you’re there, then maybe… maybe… there could be a chance…” Frustrated tears sprung out.

“If it is help that you want, I am more than happy to be your stepping stone towards hope! But I’m not sure what a despicable, useless thing like me can do,” Komaeda replied. This person in front of him appeared genuine, but also very confused. Everyone knew that someone like him could only harm others. His luck was completely unpredictable.

Hinata actually wasn’t sure where to go from here. How exactly was he supposed to bring Komaeda out of this?

Rin…

Rin had to be the answer.

He had to make him remember her!

“Where is your classroom? Take me there!” he demanded.

Komaeda easily complied; still pleasantly surprised that someone was talking to him on their own free will. “Hinata-kun?”

It was strange hearing Komaeda address him in such an innocent manner. “Yes?”

“Does Saeki-san really like me?” he quietly asked, a dreamy look on his face. “I mean… I guess if it’s a joke, you wouldn’t tell me, but…”

Hinata laughed. “She loves you move than anything in the world. I was a little jealous in the beginning, but I think I understand it now.” Rin had enough love for both of them.

Komaeda nodded before opening the door to Class 77-B.

It was loud inside and no one paid the Ultimate Lucky student any attention. It was heartbreaking to see that even though he smiled and greeted his classmates, no one acknowledged him. 

The Main Course really wasn’t how Hinata imagined it to be. It was just as disparaging as the Reserved Course!

“Where is Rin?” he asked, looking around. The redhead was nowhere to be found.

“Saeki-san is probably late, again,” Komaeda fondly replied, a smile on his face. ‘She has worse luck than me and is frequently being… interrupted on her way to school.”

Huh? Interrupted? What did that mean?

To answer him, the door slid open and he was greeted by the panting person of interest. Her long red tresses were tangled with leaves and branches. Somehow, she was also drenched from head to toe even though it was cloudless and sunny. On her pale arm was a cut that was still bleeding.

“Saeki-chan!” the teacher gasped. “No again… Tsumiki-chan, do you think you can help bandage her up?”

“O-Of c-c-course!” the soft spoken Ultimate Nurse began to patch Rin up as if it was something she did every day.

He turned back to Komaeda who was still watching her fondly with a soft blush on his face.

Ah… Komaeda had always had a crush on her, but this wasn’t the real Saeki Rin, not the present one who was in a coma.

“You like her, right? She likes you, too. I’ve seen it,” Hinata quietly told him.

Komaeda winced, grabbing his head as if in pain. “Ngh!”

“Komaeda?!”

The world around them wavered and changed. 

They were still in the classroom, but it was different. The wall to the outside was crudely patched up as if someone had broken through it not too long ago.

On the side was Nanami was her game console. She was going against Mioda, Nidai, and Tanaka.

Behind them was Hanamura with a pot of stew. “It’s ready!” he proud announced.

Hinata sat down with the rest of them. No one seemed to even notice he was there. Was he invisible in Komaeda’s mind?

Maybe, since this seemed to be a memory.

“Don’t drink the stew, Hinata-kun,” Nanami quietly warned him as she sat down to his right.

Right, no one but Nanami.

…

I brought the spoon to my lips and gave it a few light blows before tasting the broth. My eyes immediately lit up. “Ah~! Delicious!”

Hanamura grinned lecherously back at me. “If you want, I can give you something even better… in private… in my room.”

I flushed and quickly scurried off to where Komaeda was already seated against the wall with his own bowl. “Komaeda-kun, do you mind if I sit here?”

He smiled. “Of course. If you want me to leave, I’ll understand. Being around such a disgusting creature must be – “

I gave his cheek a soft slap that didn’t even turn his head and left my hand there. “I told you to stop talking like that. You are neither disgusting nor a creature. You’re my best friend and… you are the only good I’ve ever had in my life, so please don’t demean that.”

He blushed, going back to his stew as I did the same with mine.

Half way through, I was feeling a little strange. It was suddenly really hot. Did someone turn on the heat?

I ignored it for as long as I could, slowly finishing my bowl before taking off my sweater. It was uncomfortably hot now and I was feeling really strange. “Ha… Ha… Komaeda-kun…?”

He turned to me with a flushed face and a wide smile. “Rin-chan…”

The way he was looking at me… I wanted… I wanted…

He touched my shoulder and somehow, I found myself in his lap, working on his button up shirt. “Komaeda-kun, I need… Ha… I need you…”

He unzipped himself and pulled me closer against him. I could feel something poking between my legs and it felt good. I really shouldn’t feel this way. I wanted to wait to make it special, but I really liked Komaeda even though he was my best friend and he was making me feel so good.

“Let me… Let me fill you with h-hop. It will be… stupendous,” he panted, sliding a hand up my skirt to move my panty to the side.

His hot length glided along my quickly dripping slit. “Yes, Komaeda-kun. I want you to fill me with your hope. Please… _Please_!”

With permission, he began to nudge me open, causing me to gasp and throw my arms around him. It felt so strange. Was he really going to fit?

He pushed a little harder, until he met with my fragile barrier. A spark of fear hit me, but I quickly pushed it down. I needed this. I’ve always wanted to give this to him to show him my love. I was just afraid that he didn’t feel the same and I’d ruin our friendship.

“Ready, Rin-chan?” he purred, giving my ear a little flick with his tongue.

I buried my face into the crook of his neck and nodded as he gave a sharp thrust that made me cry out in pain. His soft apologies made me whine. It wasn’t his fault and I didn’t like hearing him berate himself.

“’M good, now, Komaeda-kun,” I gulped, wiggling a little adjust to his size.

He started out a little shaky, both of us were uncertain of how to do this, but slowly, the pain and discomfort disappeared. I was left panting for more. Komaeda made me feel so good. I had no regrets giving him my everything. He was my most precious person.

“A-Ah! Nagi… Nagi…” I moaned.

“Haha… Rin-chan feels so good. I’m such a greedy person. I want Rin-chan all to myself,” he whimpered. His lips attached on to my neck and began to suck, marking me as his.

“Yes! Yes! Make me yours, Nagito-kun~!” My vision exploded as I was brought over the edge. I felt him spurt into me and let out a small laugh.

I was Komaeda-kun’s…


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rape trigger warning

Hinata couldn’t bring himself to look away from the sight. No one else was paying attention to the couple, except for him. He wished that he could be part of their relationship, but this was not the time.

“We need to keep making him remember,” Nanami reminded him.

He blushed, realizing that he had, indeed, been caught staring. ‘Y-You’re right.”

He made his way to Komaeda who looked dazed and in a state of completely euphoria. ‘You have to keep remember.” But what if this turned him back into a Remnant of Despair? Was that worst that never waking up?

He wasn’t sure, but every part of him wanted Komaeda to wake. He would deal with the consequences later.

“Keep remembering Rin, Komaeda,” he encouraged. “She’s waiting for you to wake up to go back to her.”

“Rin-chan is here…” Komaeda weakly mumbled, clinging on to her even tighter, but she disappeared along with the rest of the scene.

The classroom was gone. They were in a small room with screens showing Nanami running down hallways that were filled with traps.

This was…

“Don’t watch, Hinata-kun,” Nanami quietly asked of him. “Please, don’t watch.”

He gritted his teeth and averted his gaze to the class he had seen before. Each of them had eyes swirling with despair. Amongst them were Komaeda and Rin.

“No more… No more…” Rin cried before turning to Komaeda. ‘I can’t watch this anymore. We have to get out of here! Nagito-kun! Nagito-kun!”

“Despair… Despair, it’s… Ngh!” Komaeda shook his head before looking at her with uncertainty. “Rin… chan…?”

“Let’s go! Something is wrong and we have to go!” After trying and failing to snap their other classmates out of it, she tugged him to the door and was met with…

Kamukura?

It was strange seeing someone who looked identical to him, but with such cold indifference in their glowing red eyes.

Rin’s face lit up. “Kamukura-kun! You have to help us!”

As she was about to approach him, Komaeda held her back. “You can’t trust him. He’s the one who stopped me from killing _her_ and shot me.”

She gave him a startled look. “Kamukura-kun… shot you…?”

He stopped her searching hands on his chest where the hole in his uniform was. ‘I’m fine. I’m lucky, remember? The bullet hit my student handbook and all I have now is a bruise.”

“Why did you shoot Nagito-kun?” she shouted at the Ultimate Hope. ‘Why are you siding with Enoshima? She only wants despair! I thought… I thought that you would…” 

The look of disappointment and betrayal on her face were almost palpable. 

Kamukura Izuru didn’t reply. He stepped aside for Mukuro to shoot Rin in the neck. Immediately, she fell over. 

Hinata moved forward, but her body fell through him and Komaeda quickly caught her before she could hit the floor, but he, too, was shot.

Everything dissolved to black.

…

I slowly opened my eyes, wondering why I had decided to sleep on the floor when I remembered what had happened and how Nanami was… was…

Nanami was so kind. She had been the glue keeping us all together. Why did they have to target her?

“Good morning, sleeping head!” Enoshima Junko, in the flesh, was standing in front of me with a wide, shark-like grin.

“Where am I? What do you want with me? _Why_ are you doing this?!” I was scared. I was so scared. I had seen what she was capable of. What did she have planned for me?

She laughed. “Why? It’s because of despair, of course! Don’t you find it exciting- exhilarating? Absolutely fantastic?!”

“No! Despair is terrible!” I shouted, clenching my fists.

“It’s okay. You will learn,” she purred.

With a snap of her fingers, three men walked in. I vaguely remembered seeing them in the school yard. They were from the Reserved Course.

“W-What are you…?” I let out a scream when they lunged at me, tearing at my clothes as if they were made of tissue. “Stop! STOP!” I struggled against them, but I was helpless against three larger men.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I don’t want to do this,” one of them mumbled, shaking his head. ‘But I have to… I – I can’t stop my body. She’s in my head! I can’t stop hearing her voice!”

“No!” I shrieked, killing fruitlessly at my attackers, but they held my limbs down and pushed my head against the floor.

“Oh, wait… I forgot one more thing!” Enoshima cackled, sliding a door open to reveal Komaeda tied to a chair. “Look! I brought you moral support! Don’t say I never do you any favours~!”

“R-Rin-chan…?”

I shook my head. ‘No! No, don’t look at me like this!” I sobbed, tears streaming down my face as I felt something probe me in my most intimate spot. “I only… I only ever want N-Nagito-kun to s-see me… Only Nagito-kun to t-touch me…” It was never supposed to be like this!

I could see the desperation in his misty minty eyes as he tried to struggle against his bindings to reach me. It was useless. He was only hurting himself. I could already see that his wrists were rubbed red raw.

Kamukura stood beside him with his usual stoic gaze.

I reached out towards them. “Please, help me… D-Don’t let them – “

I was never able to finish as someone tore me up from the inside. I let out a piercing scream of pain and absolute fear.

No…

No…

“Look at her! What a whore!” Enoshima teased, jumping excitedly.

A hand grabbed my hair and a fleshy column was stuffed into my mouth. I could no longer say anything. It was too difficult to even breathe.

I hated this.

Everything hurt.

It was so disgusting.

I only wanted Komaeda…

Why was Kamukura helping them? I thought him to be kind during our first meeting. I hadn’t anticipated him doing this to me. All for Enoshima Junko? All for despair…?

“This pussy feel so good!” the one behind me laughed, thrusting harder. 

They were drooling…

They were all drooling and their eyes… so full of madness and despair.

How was I to make this stop?

I needed this to stop!

“H-Help me! Help me!” I screamed over and over again, but no one could or would end this living nightmare.

I heard Komaeda shouting back and crying, but I could no longer see him when another was placed into my mouth.

So disgusting…

So disgusting…

“Rin-chan!” he shouted. “I love you! I love you!”

_Please, don’t look at me._

_I’m disgusting…_

To allow them to touch my like this…

I was only supposed to be his…

_Enoshima was right._

I was a whore.

I hated myself…

I was so helpless… useless… disgusting…

How much time had passed?

_It was inconsequential._

I could barely even feel them anymore.

I was so numb.

I wanted everything to stop.

I didn’t want to be here anymore.

_**I wanted to die.**_

…

Hinata retched and puked at the disturbing scene in front of him. He could see exactly when the light went out in her eyes and when she became nothing but a doll to be used.

Suddenly, Komaeda fell forward with his limbs free, but even then, he was a mess and no use to her. “Rin-chan… Rin-chan…” His eyes began to swirl with despair.

Kamukura suddenly darted forward, pulling the assailants off her and striking Mukuro down when she tried to interfere.

“Huh? _Ka_ mu _ku_ ra _-kun_?” Enoshima tilted her head with a confused look on her face. “What are you doing? Aren’t you going to help me spread more and more despair?”

“That is boring me,” he replied, scooping up the broken girl in his arms. 

“What? Hm… That is disappointing.” The strawberry blonde looked thoughtfully at the chaotic scene in front of her. 

“Sister, do you need me to – “

“Shut up! Didn’t I tell you your breath stinks? I hate your stupid voice!”

“Get up,” Kamukura ordered Komaeda who shakily stumbled to his feet.

The Ultimate Lucky student was clutching his hair tightly in his trembling hands and staring almost blankly at Rin’s body. “That’s not Rin-chan… Not Rin-chan…”

“We’re leaving.” Kamukura didn’t wait for the other boy to follow him.

Instead, he strolled out and walked away with no one stopping him.

“Komaeda!” Hinata shouted. “Don’t give into despair! Rin is… Rin isn’t like that anymore! She’s waiting for you, so you can’t give up. You can’t let her down! _Please_ , Komaeda…”

Komaeda’s face was streaked with tears, but a smile was on his face. “Why would it matter? I couldn’t even save her. All I could do was watch… I’m useless… I’ve always been useless – nothing but a burden and a blight to everyone around me. This is an absolute fact that can never be changed.”

The world began to waver and fall apart as Komaeda faltered.

“Rin-chan… I don’t deserve Rin-chan… Love Rin-chan so much…”

Hinata shook Komaeda’s bony shoulders. “Snap out of it!” Even saying that, he was still traumatised and had the acrid taste of vomit still in his mouth. Was this really a memory? 

It seemed inhumane to make Komaeda live through it, again.

Had he made a mistake? This couldn’t possibly be the only way to wake him up, but he wasn’t given a manual! He didn’t know what he was doing at all! He just wanted his friends back! Why… Why couldn’t he do anything right?

“Ha… Hinata-kun…” Komaeda laughed. “What’s the point in trying anymore?”

Hinata clenched his hands. “Because this isn’t the future. I refuse to believe that this is how the story ends!”

“You’re right… It isn’t…” Komaeda smiled maniacally at him. “Let me show you, Hinata-kun. Let me show you how you made us feel better. No, not you… Kamukura-sama.”

Their surroundings shifted into focus and they were in an ordinary house.

Komaeda was sitting in an armchair, staring at the bed where two figures were laying.

“Make me feel good, again,” she begged, her grey eyes were stormy and drool ran down the corner of her lips. 

Her clothes were already gone and she was unbuttoning Kamukura’s dress shirt.

Komaeda let out a low groan, lifting his hips to kick off his jeans. His hand quickly slid down to his weeping cock.

What was going on?!

Hinata’s brain was about to explode. “Stop just sitting there!” he snapped at his friend who had a dreamy smile on his face.

“But Rin-chan is so pretty like this…” Komaeda panted back, rubbing the engorged head. “Isn’t she, Hinata-kun?”

He gritted his teeth. From the corner of his eyes, he caught sight of Kamukura seizing her wrist and after hitting a pressure point behind her neck, she slumped over, unconscious.”

“Ah… I really wanted to watch…” Komaeda whined.

Kamukura gently shifted Rin on to the couch before walking over to Komaeda. He gripped the snowy hair tight in his hand and brought the other’s lips to his won.

Hinata’s eyes widened almost comically. His face flare up and it felt as if he was about to pass out with how much blood was rushing to his head.

“Ha… Kamukura-sama…” Komaeda moaned, unzipping the long-haired brunet’s pants. “Kamukura-sama is such a pervert, but he won’t tell anyone. Kamukura-sama wants to fuck Rin-chan, but… I will let you use me, until then.”

Hinata didn’t need to see this. His heart was pounding in his chest. This was too much! “Stop! Stop! I don’t want to see anymore!” He was still coming to terms with his feelings. He wasn’t ready to face this truth, yet!

The scene disappeared and a pair of arms wrapped around his waist. Warm breath gently caressed his ear.

“Hinata-kun…”

He gritted his teeth. “Stop playing with me! This… This isn’t a game!”

“But Hinata-kun is so fun to play with,” Komaeda purred.

“Don’t you want to wake up and be with her, again? None of this is real, but it could be!” Well, Hinata preferred if they weren’t teetering back into despair, but he was willing to accept just about anything he could get at this point.

Komaeda sighed, pressing his cheek again Hinata’s hair. “I want to see Rin-chan, but I can’t. I don’t deserve to even look at her after what I did!”

“What do you mean? Tanaka and Nidai said she wanted to die. What happened?” Hinata found it difficult to understand how someone who had been so happy just the day before had crumbled into despair and opted to die. What could’ve driven her to lose her will to live?

Komaeda sighed. “After Monokuma gave me the book, I showed it to her. I lost myself and yelled at her. I wasn’t proud of the things I said. I scared her. I saw the hope be replaced by despair and it only made me angrier. We are all Remnants of Despair! At that very moment, she had only proven me right, so I told her to leave. I failed her, Hinata-kun. It was my fault she died.

“I never… I never got to apologise and tell her that I still loved her,” he quietly sobbed.

Hinata touched the arms holding him. “Then you should wake up and go tell her yourself. She needs you. I know she does, so wake up and we can… wake her up together.”

“She really… hasn’t…?”

“I think she’s been waiting for you. She had died in despair, so instead of running away like a coward, you have to make things right!” Hinata felt a burst of determination fill him. 

“Haha… I’m jealous… It’s because of this that a part of me thought Rin-chan would leave me for you,” Komaeda whispered. “But that wasn’t it at all. She loved me before I wronged her. She also loved you. Ha… Rin-chan… So full of love…”

Tears hit Hinata’s neck as Komaeda trembled against him. He turned to face the other man. “You look like him – Kamukura-sama. A Reserved Course student like you to be here with us Ultimates… There must be something special about you. I never thought it was because you’re _him_.” Komaeda had a soft blush on his face. ‘I wonder if that’s why I am also attracted to a talentless stepping stone like you.”

“Stop saying things like that! I’m me and Kamukura is Kamukura!” he retorted. “And just because I was in the Reserved Course and doesn’t have talents like you, doesn’t make me any less than all the other Ultimates!”

Komaeda laughed. “Okay.”

“Ne, Nagito-kun?” her soft voice echoed. 

Hinata looked all around him, but they were the only ones here, now. 

“Nagito-kun, we’ll be together forever, right? Promise you’ll never leave me?”

“I promise…” Komaeda whispered in perfect unison with the lingering memory. 

He tilted his head back. “Take me away from here. I’m ready to wake up, but… If you lied to me and Rin-chan is dead…” His eyes darkened, still swirling a cruel amalgamation of hope and despair. “You will join her shortly.”

Hinata realised that Komaeda was never going to be what society deemed as normal. “She’s not. Have hope, okay?”

_“Hm…”_


	18. Chapter 18

**CHAPTER EIGHTEEN**

My eyes snapped open as I noticed a disturbance where I should’ve clearly been alone, but there was someone else here now. I didn’t know whether to be afraid or happy.

I sat up to find a dark figure with glowing red eye staring back at me. “W-Who are you?”

Was he also dead? I couldn’t think of any other reason why he’d be here.

As he walked over and closer, I realised that he kind of reminded me of Hinata, but with much longer hair and crimson orbs. Were they related?

“Saeki Rin.”

My eyes widened. “You know me?” How…?

Other than resembling Hinata, he _did_ seem kind of familiar.

When he knelt in front of me, my eyes were immediately drawn to his long, dark locks. They pooled around him like a beautiful silk curtain.

Without thinking, I reached out and ran my hand down the locks. “So… soft…” I blushed, rubbing the tendril against my cheek. “I’m jealous…”

He let out a quiet sigh before sitting down with one knee up and an arm draped over it.

“Who are you?” I asked, still entranced by this other worldly figure. Was he a demon? Was this actually Hell?

“Kamukura Izuru.”

“Kamukura-san?”

It felt as if I should know the name, but I couldn’t understand why.

When I asked him more questions, he’d curtly reply, never using more words than was necessary to get his point across.

He really didn’t say much, but he kept me company. His presence was welcomed. Whether he was real or not didn’t matter because I wasn’t so lonely anymore. Besides, I really, really liked his hair.

Kamukura listened to everything I had to say. I even ranted to him about Komaeda. 

Komaeda was such a stupid face.

I really missed him…

I wondered where he went after he died. A part of me hoped that he’d join me and the other hoped that he was somewhere better because I really hated this place. Wherever he was now, I wished him all the best, but…

I still really missed him…

“Ne, Kamukura-san.” I poked his cheek, causing him to turn towards me and blink. If he was a hallucination, then he wouldn’t mind me doing that. If he wasn’t then he’d just have to tolerate me. “Tell me about yourself?”

“That’s boring,” he replied in that same deadpanned tone.

Nothing ever showed on his face and I always wondered what he was thinking. He was a complete mystery to me.

I huffed. How was I ever going to crack someone like him? I was very good with socialising and he was even more difficult than normal people.

Suddenly, I was pulled forward, landing haphazardly in his lap. 

Huh?

My face flushed as I noticed that this cold man was actually very warm. 

“I am the product of an experiment done at Hope’s Peak Academy,” he said it so plainly that I immediately questioned what I just heard.

Experiment?

Hope’s Peak Academy?

What?

I looked up to him. His eyes were far away as he held me against his body. “What happened, Kamukura-san? How did you end up an experiment? Why?” It seemed a bit intrusive of me to ask, but he offered, so that meant he wouldn’t mind, right?

“An experiment wasn’t done on me. I _was_ the experiment. I was the artificial amalgamation of talents infused into Hinata Hajime.” The more he said, the less sense he made!

He was something that was a part of Hinata? That explained why they were so physically similar, but the resemblance stopped there. Their personalities were completely different.

Pensively, I wrapped his hair around my fingers. The only way to explain this was that I had make Kamukura up. My sanity had finally collapsed and I hallucinated him to stave off the loneliness.

That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, but I wished that Komaeda was also here. If it was my hallucination, why couldn’t that he real, too? It’d help my conscience because then I wouldn’t feel as guilty for being so attracted to this stranger.

Was he actually a stranger? He was part of Hinata and Komaeda liked Hinata, too…

Ah! This was making my head hurt!

“So where were you during Jabberwock Island?” I asked, shifting to tuck myself more comfortably beneath his chin. “If you’re part of Hinata-kun, then why didn’t you come out? He’s never spoken about you.”

“He had forgotten and I intended to watch in the back,” he said, his hand began to run through my hair. “I was deciding where I wanted to stand in the battle between hope and despair.”

“Oh…” I looked down. “Have you chosen, then?”

“Yes.”

I frowned when he didn’t elaborate, so I pushed him for more information. “What did you choose?”

His piercing orbs fell upon mine, leaving me entranced. “Listening to Enoshima grew tiring.” Did that means what I thought it meant? “I was more invested with two individuals who were obsessed with hope.”

Ah…

“Nagito-kun?” I was really curious to know, but he refused to tell me. Could my curiosity never be satisfied? Why did he have to be so tight-lipped?

With a sigh, I opted to relax back into his arms. I had all the time in the world. There was no need to rush. Sooner or later, he was going to cave in.

My eyes slowly began to droop as silence fell between us.

Somehow, Kamukura’s light petting became a little more intimate as time passed. It felt good, but I didn’t want to admit it since it felt as if I was betraying Komaeda.

I wanted to tell him to stop. I _needed_ to tell him to stop. I would’ve if my body wasn’t craving for more. His attention was precious, so I stayed cuddled up against him. 

When his hand left my head to trail down to my room lip, I opened my eyes. It was almost as if he was asking for permission, but he waited for no verbal consent. The slight tilt of my head was enough.

He captured my lips with his with passion that left me breathless and wanting more. How could someone so impassive exude so much… so much… I didn’t even know what it was!

“Ngh… K-Kamukura-kun!” I panted when he broke away.

We kissed more.

And more.

And more.

But soon, just kissing wasn’t enough.

I rocked myself against the bulge that was poking at me. I tried to resist as long as I could, but what was the point? I was dead and stuck here forever with only Kamukura as my only company. 

Most likely, I was never going to see Komaeda again…

Had he moved on?

Was he happier where he was?

Kamukura hummed, stealing my attention once more.

“Kamu – “

He had an irritated look on his face that made me freeze.

“Kamukura-kun…”

“That’s not what you called me…” he mumbled, frowning ever so slightly.

What?

“Kamukura-san…?”

The long sigh made it obvious that I still hadn’t gotten it right, but I didn’t know what he wanted from me. He would never outright say it.

Dismissing his frustration, he began to make quick work of our clothes. “Ha…” I panted, thought slowly drifting away as his hands moved down my body before positioning himself at my entrance. “K-Ka… Ngh~!”

With one fluid movement, he was fully inside me. “Y-Yes… Kamukura-s-s…Nngh…” I moaned, wrapping my arms around him.

He seemed to know exactly what to do and where to touch to leave me in a puddle of pleasure. “K-Kamukura-sama!” I cried out, arching my back.

The need kept growing. 

“More… More…” I begged.

He obliged, moving faster and harder – pounding into my as I screamed. “Izuru-sama!” My eyes fluttered, rolling back.

Even then, he kept going, pushing in and out of my convulsing walls. “N-No… I can’t…” I babbled, drooling.

I was so sensitive, but I was no longer capable of asking him to stop. I was a completely mess.

He lifted my leg, angling himself so that he was slamming against my cervix every time.

I gasped at the pain and pleasure. It was too much… “Ngh!”

“One more…” he murmured. “Cum for me, Rin.”

That was enough to push me over the edge again as if I was conditioned to obey. I wanted to tell him that I couldn’t take anymore, but I could only mew and mumble incoherently.

He sighed, rolling us over so that I was comfortably resting on top of him. I unconsciously moved his hair to cover my body.

Everything felt so good…

When I woke up, I wondered for a moment if what happened had been a dream, but the feel of a warm body beneath mine was enough to quirk my lips upward. He was still there and his arms were around my waist. His hair was also wrapped around various parts of my body, causing it to tingle.

“Kamukura-kun…” I whispered, kissing the smooth skin.

“Izuru…” he mumbled.

A minute went by before… 

Oh!

That was what he was talking about yesterday. Ha… He wanted me to call him by his first name? That was pretty intimate. It took me a while to call Komaeda by his given name, but since we already went all the way, I guess it wouldn’t hurt.

“Izuru-sama…” I smiled, enjoying how it rolled over my tongue. “Izuru-sama…”

I really liked his name.

“Izuru-sa – “

He tilted my head and captured the last syllable with his lips. 

Kamukura was so demanding sometimes…

It would be a while before I received more visitors. I hadn’t expected them to appear, but… It was only a matter of time, right? I invented the perfect imaginary companion, so surely those two would show up as well.

“Nagito-kun… Hinata-kun…” I was caught snuggled against Kamukura, but clothed and looking surprisingly decent.

Even if it was my imagination, my heart still soared at the sight of them and to see my snowy haired lover looking well… It was truly a blessing.

My eyes seemed to have lingered on for too long because Hinata stepped forward to gain my attention. “Rin…”

A small frown appeared on my face. How was he here if Kamukura was here? From what I understood, they shared a body.

No, was that real?

No, no… None of this was real.

I…

I clenched my eyes shut and grabbed my hair. “Ah…”

“Rin!”

“Rin-chan!”

They both fell to their knees in front of me, but that only made it worse. They were too close. They felt too real. How could this be? How could my mind conjure up something so tangible? It was unfair! How was I to keep my sanity when they were like this?

“No… No… Stop…”

I scrambled away from them and out of Kamukura’s arms. My body shook as I tried to comprehend everything that was swirling in my head. There was too much… Too much…

“What’s wrong with her?” Hinata shouted at Kamukura. “What did you do?!”

Kamukura merely turned his head away and looked at me. “Rin… This is real.”

“Ha… Of course you would say something like that,” I laughed, shaking my head. “This can’t be real… I’m died… I died… I’m _dead_ , Izuru-sama! How could any of this be real…? A-Are you dead, too? Why are there _two of you?!_ ”

Hinata came up to me and cupped my face. “I’m real, Rin. We’re all real. I don’t know how _he_ is here or why we became separated, but… but… This is a bit confusing to explain, but none of _this_ is real. We’re in the Neo World Program – a virtual world created by the Future Foundation.”

I shook my head again. “No. You can’t be real _and_ not real. I mean… _Am **I**_ _real?!_ ”

I never questioned my own existence before, but this seemed like the perfect time.

“Rin-chan…” I looked over to Komaeda standing right behind Hinata with his hand extended towards me, but seemed afraid to come any closer. “I…” Tears formed in his eyes and suddenly, he was on his knees by my feet. His entire body shook and his beautiful green eyes were filled with sadness. 

“No… This isn’t fair…” I mumbled, my own tears welling up. “Y-You can’t…”

My legs collapsed beneath me as I stared at him. “Nagito-kun…”

I saw him die, didn’t I? Maybe he _was_ real or maybe that was also a hallucination. How could I tell?! 

But…

I had indulged so long with Kamukura, would it be so wrong to also accept Komaeda and Hinata?

Ha…

Maybe this was actually heaven where I can happily be with all of them.

“Nagito-kun…” I pulled him into a hug and began to sob into his chest.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry…” he chanted, rubbing his cheek against the top of my head. ‘It’s my fault. I don’t deserve you, but I don’t know how to let you go. I’ve tried, but I can’t. It’s impossible. What a terrible excuse of a human being I am – selfish, worthless, worst of the wors…”

I lightly slapped his cheek, leaving my hand on his soft skin and warm face, which was wet with tears. He didn’t feel dead. He didn’t look dead. “I forgive you, Nagito-kun. Haven’t I said that already? What I don’t forgive is you hurting, torturing, and killing yourself. Seeing it was so horrifying, you stupid face.” 

“Ha… You were actually there,” he chuckled with a sad smile. “How lucky I was to see you before I died.”

“Stupid…” I mumbled again, tugging him down for a kiss.

He pushed me against Kamukura who had finally moved from his previous spot and was content with holding me in place.

Komaeda’s lips were slightly chapped, but he still tasted sweet like marshmallows.

When we broke apart, I saw Hinata standing awkwardly to the side. I reached out to him like I did all those previous times. “Hinata-kun…”

“I-I shouldn’t. I don’t want to intrude…” he stuttered, taking a step back.

Komaeda also turned to him with a teasing smile. “Join us, Hinata-kun. Didn’t you say you want to?”

“When d-did I say something l-like that to you?!” he shouted.

“So you’ve said it to someone else?” Komaeda snickered.

“No!”

“Hinata-kun… You said you’re real, right? Show me…” Ah… I was being so indecent.

Hinata’s eyes flickered to Kamukura who remained silent.

“I…” With a small puff of a sigh, he gave in and practically collapsed in front of us.

I wrapped my arms around him. “I missed you, Hinata-kun. I really wish I got to see you before… Hm… I probably shouldn’t continue. Let’s not think about that. Sorry.”

He reciprocated the embrace, tugging me closer. “I missed you, too.”

We stayed tangled together, until Komaeda slipped a cold hand beneath my blouse.

I let out a sharp gasp at the sensation of his fingers dancing along my skin.

“N-Nagito-kun…”

He gazed at me with dark eyes, leaning over once more to capture my lips.

Here? Like this?

I did practically ask for it.

Excitement pooled at the bottom of my stomach.

It was so naughty…

Hinata’s face was red as he wordlessly watched us.

“Kamukura-sama…” Once we broke apart, Komaeda leaned down further and waited for Kamukura to push their lips together.

He knew Kamukura? When? How…?

At the moment, the questions didn’t seem so important, so I stored it away for the future.

I tugged Hinata down, kissing him as I continued to watch the other two.

Kamukura’s long fingers brushed my panties to the side and slid one digit into my back tunnel. After short seconds, he thrust himself into me. When did he even…?

I cried out, writhing between them as Hinata’s eyes widened and was about to panic when I let out a loud moan. His eyes trailed downward where Kamukura and my body were joined together.

It must’ve been strange to see his body in front of him, especially in a situation like this. It was very arousing for me, but I wondered what he must be thinking.

I gently nibbled on his bottom lip before licking it. He sighed again before closed his eyes, melting into the kiss.

I saw Komaeda move behind him, pulling at his pants.

“K-Komaeda…” Hinata groaned, feeling Komaeda probe his puckered hole. “I’m not sure… I’ve never…”

“Don’t worry, Hinata-kun. I’ll be gentle.” There was a devious twinkle in his eyes as he deftly prepared the virgin. “Ha… You’re so tight… I want to be your first.” With that said, he slipped his fingers out and slowly pushed the head of his engorged cock into the brunet.

Hinata let out a cry and I swallowed it up, distracting him from the foreign invasion by reaching for his weeping cock.

“H-Hinata-kun…” The silky flesh was so hot. I stroked it several times before running it along my slit. Leaning back against Kamukura, I managed to find a comfortable position to slide Hinata into my other hole. We both moaned. His length was only separated by a thin membrane that separated him from a cock identical to his own.

Felt so good…

Everything felt so good.

Komaeda giggled, face flushed with pleasure.

He was absolutely entrancing.

Just watching them was nearly enough to push me over the edge. My tunnels began to squeeze, begging for release.

The sound of our sweaty bodies moving together and the wet noise of us connecting each time…

“Not yet,” Kamukura murmured, his hand trailing down to my sensitive bundle of nerves.

I let out a muffled scream of frustration.

How? How was I to keep it in?

Tears began to fall again, but I didn’t want to disappoint him. “I-Izuru-sama…”

He was really aiming to drive me crazy!

“Ha… Ha… Harder… Ngh… Harder!”

Komaeda reached over Hinata’s shoulder and pulled my head towards him to consume my lips as the four of us became one. “Nagito-kun… More… More… I need…”

I needed so much and they happily gave it all to me.

Somewhere in my hazy mind, I noticed that they had switched positions. Komaeda was beneath me with Kamukura still behind. Each thrust from him drove me deeper into Komaeda. I took Hinata into my mouth, tasting myself on his member. 

Komaeda raised his head to take a perk nipple into his mouth.

I let out a muffled scream.

We stayed here for what felt like days, indulging in each other. Even though there wasn’t much else to do, I was happy again. I had the people I love and I knew they loved me back. What more could someone like me possibly ask for?

…

“Haha… Hinata-kun…” Komaeda groaned, slowly sliding out of him to curl up against Kamukura.

He looked past Rin’s unconscious form to his counterpart. Those piercing red eyes were slightly narrowed as they stared back at him.

A question came to mind, but he removed himself from the trio first to clear his mind.

Kamukura shifted Rin for her to cuddle against Komaeda instead.

“Why?” Hinata asked. “How long have you been here with her? Why haven’t you tried to get her out? I know if you wanted to, your luck would’ve found a way to get her out of the Neo World Program.”

“I have been here as long as you’ve been with the Servant plus the time needed to travel once more into the Neo World Program,” Kamukura replied, gaze never wavering even when Komaeda moved at the name.

“Then _why_?!” Hinata repeated, gritting his teeth in irritation. How could his alter ego be so different from him?

“Once we leave, I will return to your body.”

Why was he telling him this instead of –

Oh…

He looked more closely at the trio. It was as if he was inside a memory once more, but this was real in its own way. Kamukura was able to have his own body here and resume their relationship.

“Are you able to control my body like… before?” he quickly asked.

“I can.”

But Kamukura didn’t. He allowed Hinata control, but perhaps they could work out a compromise. Hinata was part of the reason why Kamukura exist in the first place. It wouldn’t be fair to treat him as a lesser entity when the Ultimate Hope clearly wasn’t.

“If you want, we can… share… my body.” It sounded strange. How could reality be even stranger than the Neo World Program?

Komaeda let out a string of giggles. He lazily gazed up at Hinata with his arms and legs wrapped around Rin like a koala. “I thought we just share your body, Hinata-kun.”

And just like that, the tense atmosphere shattered and Hinata let out a sigh before lying down beside the Ultimate Luck. “Yeah… Yeah…”

When Rin woke up, Hinata was still thinking back on what he had done. Was it wrong? To enjoy something so perverse…

A hand reached over and began to pet his flaccid member, quickly rousing it from rest.

“K-Komaeda…” He had never seen the snowy-haired boy so soft and happy. Not an ounce of madness was in those minty green orbs. “How are you feeling?”

“Happy… Hopeful…” Komaeda sighed. “A part of me wants to stay here and never face the reality of what I had done, but I also want Rin-chan to remember us and make better memories on Jabberwock Island. I know the others will be glad to see her wake up as well.”

“Mm…”

They all turned to see her eyes flutter open and a smile immediately graced her lips when her gaze fell on them. “You’re still here…”

Sometimes, she still had difficulty believing that they’re real and it was heart breaking. She had been alone in nothing for so long…

Hinata reached across Komaeda to squeeze her hand. “Yeah, and we’re not going to leave you, but we have to leave the Neo World Program, now.”

“Do we… have to?”

He was afraid of this.


	19. Chapter 19

Hinata filled me in on everything regarding the Neo World Program and even the world that had fallen into despair. The look on Komaeda’s face confirmed everything for me. 

I didn’t want to leave here anymore. I didn’t like the sound of what was waiting for me.

“What if I fall into despair again?” I whispered. Clearly, I wasn’t all there and the medication didn’t seem to be working properly. 

Hinata wrapped his arms around me. “We won’t let you. We’ll be by your side, always, okay?”

I clung on to him, uncertainty still swam at the bottom of my stomach, but I had to trust them. They wouldn’t lead my astray. “Promise? Promise you’ll never leave me?”

Komaeda wound his arms around my waist from behind, burying his face into my hair. “Promise, Rin-chan.”

“I promise,” Hinata agreed.

I peeked between the two men to glance at Kamukura who also gave a small nod. “Okay then, but… how do we leave this place? I’ve wandered everywhere and there’s literally nothing.”

Hinata told us about a _kick_ he had discussed with Naegi. It would temporarily change his vitals to signal the other to pull them out of the program.

From his pocket, he took out a small device and with a deep breath, pressed the button. A shock went through his body. “Man, it’s as unpleasant as the first time,” he groaned, rubbing his chest. His spiky hair was even spikier than usual.

I turned to Kamukura. “Does this mean I can’t have both of you at the same time, now?” My smile was light, but I was going to miss this.”

“It will be fine. You’ll have us both and the Servant,” he stated. The dead pant one made me laugh and he pulled me into a kiss as the darkness cracked and shattered all around us.

“Izuru-sama… I… I love y – “

My eyes snapped open and it was as if I had surfaced after drowning. I couldn’t breathe. The world around me was blurry and wouldn’t stop moving.

“… ‘nto… ck…”

“Rin!”

“Br…”

I shakily raised my hand towards a pale blob who grabbed it.

“… here…”

“Breathe!” 

I gasped and my lungs were finally able to expand. Black dots danced in my eyes.

“Her vitals are stabilising,” a voice said.

“Rin-chan…” Komaeda’s face slowly came into focus and I was quickly gathered into his arms. It felt as if my brain was sloshing around inside my head. “Rin-chan…”

“Nagito-kun…” I sighed, burying myself closer against him.

This was real…

Everything felt just a little different, but this was real and…

I winced when memories assaulted me. Things that I was glad to remember and things that I would’ve gladly forgotten

_“I’m Saeki Rin. What’s your name?”_

_“I really like you Komaeda-kun.”_

_“Please stop talking like that about yourself!”_

_“It hurts… Please make it stop…”_

_“Make me feel good again, Izuru-sama…”_

_“Look at all the bodies! So despairing…”_

_“I really hate her.”_

_“Please, don’t leave.”_

_“The kids will hear…”_

_“Servant-kun…”_

_“You’ll save him?”_

_“Please, don’t let him die… I can’t live without him!”_

_“I’ll do anything… Just… Don’t let him die…”_

He held me until it was over and I relaxed into his embrace. “Ngh… Nagito-kun…” A small laugh left my lips. “After all that time on Jabberwock Island and being so indecisive, we’ve been together for almost six years now! To think I fell in love with you all over again without even knowing you we were to each other…”

He also let out a joyous laugh, his breath tickling my ears. “I never would’ve thought that someone like me could be so fortunate…”

I tilted my head to look at him. “I think you took my line there, Nagito-kun. With so much bad luck in my life, I’m not sure how I managed to end up here with you. I really love you.”

He happily pressed our lips together rand for a moment, all things were forgotten, until another form walked up and stopped behind Komaeda.

“Ah…” I reached out, tangling my fingers around the dark locks in delight. “You kept your hair.”

His eyes were two different colours – Hinata Hazel and Kamukura Crimson. I couldn’t tell who was in control. Maybe both? “What should I call you, now? Hajiru?”

He grimaced. “Please, don’t…”

So it was Hinata, which meant that I could continue to tease him and get amusing replies. “Yeah, that’s not a good name. How about Izume?”

He balked, shaking his head fervently. “None of those please. Either of our names is okay, but right now, I prefer Hinata or Hajime.”

I nodded. “I know. It’s fine, Hinata-kun. I’m sure I can tell you two apart.”

“Saeki Rin!”

I tilted my head to see Naegi Makoto. He was a rather vague memory, barely anything better than a moving blob, directing me to follow him and step into the pods.

He was the one to bring us all here and hoped that the Neo World Program could take the despair out of us. I guessed that it kind of worked, until Monokuma showed up and we were picked off one by one. Not to mention the Despair Disease...

“I’m sorry that it turned out this way, but I’m glad everyone has woken up. How are you feeling?” he asked.

I looked at my two boys and also the people waiting in anticipation at the door way.

I guessed that everything _did_ turn out alright after all. What did I really have to complain about? I had just about everything that made me happy.

“Pretty good considering it kind of felt like I was dying again just now,” I jokingly replied.

He scratched the back of his neck, looking sheepishly back at me. “Yeah, I apologise for that. I didn’t really expect your body to go into shock after being reintroduced to the real world. I’ll check up on you several times a day to make sure there aren’t any lasting negative side effects.”

He pulled several wires away from me. “For now, I’ll let you catch up with your friends. They’re all waiting to talk to you.”

As soon as he gave the signal, they came running in, even the people I was never particularly close to.”

“I am so very glad you are awake, Rin-san!” Sonia gushed with her hands clasped in front of her.

“Took you long enough!” Saionji quipped. She was a lot taller than her avatar, but I kind of remembered the growth spurt she had one summer, surprisingly all of us.

Tanaka was the next to speak. It was strange seeing him without his Four Dark Devas of Destruction. I wondered where they could be. Were they even still alive? “It is lightening to be able to sense your spirit, once more.”

I smiled when Nidai also stepped up to loudly apologise. “There’s no need,” I told him. “I was the one to tell you to do it, remember? Besides, none of it was real. Let’s put it all behind us.”

“YES! THAT IS A GOOD IDEA!”

I received hugs from everyone, while Koizumi snapped countless photos of everyone to commemorate the memory. Everyone from the Neo World program had finally woken up.

Well… Almost everyone…

_Monomi…_

_Nanami…_

She was the only one we were never going to see again. Our precious class representative…

I was glad that Enoshima Junko was dead. No one should’ve died like Nanami, especially not for something so ridiculous!

“Let’s party! I’m hungry! Where’s the food?” Owari exclaimed. Her thin-anorexic form was a stark contrast to what I was used to seeing, but at least she seemed to have her appetite.

Hanamura nodded. “Splendid idea! I will get on to cooking up a feast right away!”

I took my first few steps. My legs were shaky from lack of use and Komaeda had to hold me up. He was much thinner, too. Beneath his oversized coat was skin and bones.

He had been sick since before he was even admitted to Hope’s Peak Academy. Several times a month, he’d skip class to go to the hospital. Sometimes, I’d spend the day with him in the white, sterile rooms. He was always in good spirits despite all the wires connected to him. I never knew how he kept his unwavering smile. 

His brain was deteriorating and he had cancer. None of the doctors thought he’d last for much longer, but… He was still here and most of them probably weren’t, now…

“Is something wrong?” he asked, tilting his head.

I placed my hand on his cheek. “Are _you_ okay? You were so sick before we came here.” That was one of the reasons why Kamukura decided to give in to the Future Foundation. They promised to help Komaeda to the best of their abilities.

He smiled. “Naegi-kun had a look at me right after I woke up – gave me a full body scan before allowing me to go find you. I’m fine. I’m stable and should be able to live a normalish life. IO mean, whatever damage that was caused will take time to heal, but I don’t seem to be getting any worse. I really _do_ have the best luck, don’t I?”

I beamed back at him.

That was wonderful news!

He hummed merrily when I pecked him on the cheek.

“Waah! Ibuki ships!” the energetic musician shouted, pointing her finger at us.

Everyone stared at us, but we ignored them. I didn’t care what they thought of us. Besides, Komaeda and I haven’t exactly been subtle in the Neo World Program. There was little doubt they didn’t already know about us, except perhaps the first few who died.

I looked over to Hanamura who was grinning lecherously back at us. “Please, do continue,” he snickered. “This would be great material for when I’m – “

Koizumi whacked him upside the head. “Don’t even think of continuing that sentence!

Hanamura merely cackled to himself, completely undeterred, and lost in his own imagination.

It was nice seeing everyone alive and well again. Everything seemed so hopeless in the program despite it ironically supposed to cure us of despair. At least, it seemed to have worked since none of us tried to kill each other here, yet.

Komaeda tightened his grip around my waist, causing me to give him a confused look.

“Nagito-kun, is something wrong?” I asked, tilting my head.

He smiled down at me. “Of course not. I have no reason to be upset.”

No, that was wrong. Something was definitely wrong. Aside from his gaunt face, there was also his arm. He kept glancing down at it and twitching that arm that he kept almost always hidden behind his back. 

I remembered what he had done after Enoshima died. He retrieved a fire axe from the school and just began to hack at his left arm. There was so much blood everywhere. If Kamukura hadn’t found us in time, he would’ve bled to death because I had been absolutely useless during that situation. I was panicking and crying, holding on to him as he tried to jam _her_ disgusting arm into his bloody stump.

Komaeda wasn’t paying any attention to anything else. He didn’t even seem to be in pain, just rambling on about hope and despair – about how _he_ should’ve been the one to kill her. He thought the arm would somehow give him powers to create another Enoshima Junko for him to defeat. He was completely obsessed with defeating despair and becoming the Ultimate Hope.

It was terrifying.

Kamukura somehow managed to staunch most of the bleeding and with the hem of my white dress, he bandaged up Komaeda but with the addition of the ghastly arm. The Ultimate Luck refused to let us do anything without it, so we had to compromise just to make sure he didn’t die.

Now, it seemed to be bothering him. Every once in a while, he’d forget and tried to gesture with it, but the hand hung limply – useless. The only blessing was that it hadn’t started to decay. His luck was truly impeccable. 

There had to be something we could do, starting with removing that repulsive thing. I was going to have to bring it up to Kamukura later. For now, I didn’t want to ruin anyone’s mood when they all seemed so happy.

We entered the old building where the first murder took place. I could see the pain in his eyes. Everything reminded him of something he’d hope to forget. 

“It’s okay. Everyone is fine,” I murmured, wrapping my arms around him as we wandered away from the group to the dusty, old supply room.

He let out a sad laugh. “It doesn’t negate the fact that I had planned it. My reasoning doesn’t matter. They all look at me with such distrust. I wouldn’t be surprised if they poison my food.”

I frowned, but it was Hinata who spoke up.

“I won’t let them try anything. I’ll try everything first if I have to,” he stated with determination. “Besides, four of us here have actually successfully killed someone in the other world. The only way we can co-exist together is by moving on.”

I nodded, smiling at the support.

Komaeda turned his eyes down to the ground, which left me frustrated again. I grabbed his face. “Listen, Komaeda-kun, stop beating yourself over this. None of this was ever your fault. It was _her_ It was Enoshima Junko. Because of her, we had _all_ succumbed to despair, so please… Please stop hating yourself b-because… because…” I hated how my voice started to crack and the tears began to fall. “I-It hurts me, Nagito-kun… To always s-see you in so mu-much p-p-pain…”

“Ha… To be the reason your sweet tears fall… I must truly be despicable…” He shook his head, staring back at me with self-loathing eyes.

“Komaeda…” Hinata mumbled. “Don’t our love matter?”

Minty green eyes widened. “They mean more than anything in the world to me! More than my own life!”

“Then stop because we _need_ you to value yourself. Even if we have to do it with baby steps, we’re here, and we’re not going anywhere.” Hinata pulled Komaeda down for a kiss. A soft blush was on both of their faces. It was the first time they had kissed here, outside of the void.

“I’m glad we’re hidden away here. It’d be terrible if everyone saw you do that with garbage like m – “

I was the one to cut him off this time with the press of my lips against his. I clung on to him until we were both breathless. “S-Stop it. That is exactly what we’ve been saying. We’re not ashamed to be seen with you, so stop worrying about it. _You_ are what make us happy. No one else’s opinion matters.”

As I stepped back, Komaeda tugged me back into another urgent kiss. “Ha… Ha… Then, allow me to be greedy.”

“Hey, you guys in there? Food is ready!” Kuzuryu shouted from somewhere down the hall.

“C-Coming!” Hinata replied, tugging us both out.

I was certain that the yakuza knew exactly what we had been doing, but decided against saying anything. He merely scoffed and made his way back to the dining hall.

As expected, Hanamura had cooked up a grand feast of delicious food and this time, there were no blackouts or dead bodies beneath the back table.

Everyone wanted to talk to Hinata and congratulated the six survivors. It was heartening to see, but as expected, there were numerous suspicious glances being shot Komaeda’s way. I had a feeling that it wasn’t all because of what happened in this room, but also from something that happened after I died. When I asked him about it, he refused to tell me anything.

Perhaps when he was ready…

“Rin-chan, you don’t have to stay here with me,” he nudged my side. “You can go mingle. I’ll wait here.”

I shook my head. “Don’t be silly. I am where I want to be. No one’s moving me from this spot.” I wiggled my butt in his lap to emphasise my point.

He let out a breathy gasp, stilling my movement with his trembling hands. “R-Rin-chan…”

I leaned back comfortably against him with a glass of punch. 

It was all fun and games, until Hanamura served us his special stew. I should’ve known something would go awry, but I was happy and relaxed. It didn’t seem like anything was supposed to go wrong.


	20. Chapter 20

My body felt hot and I was wantonly rubbing myself all over Komaeda.

“D-Do you think Saionji-san…?” I panted, trying to look for the blonde terror, but it was impossible. My gaze immediately drew back to him

“Ngh…” He clenched his eyes shut.” “N-Not here… D-Don't want everyone else to s-see Rin-chan…”

It hadn’t bothered him last time, but with the last of my self control, I managed to drag him back into the dusty storage room and began to tug at his clothes, while he did the same to me.

Once we were sufficiently bare and on the musty floor, he wrapped my legs around him and slid into me. The feeling of absolute completeness was perfect. My eyes fluttered as I let out a low moan of pleasure.

His movements stuttered as he jerked and groaned.

I was so absorbed with the sensation of him that I didn’t even notice another presence in the room, until my legs brushed against soft tendrils of hair.

“I-Izuru-sama!” I cried out in surprised, especially when he entered Komaeda from behind.

Komaeda gasped, tilting his head back. “Kamukura-sama!”

I shuddered, seeing my two lovers fuck on top of me.

It was so depraved…

I wondered how affected I still was by despair because this wasn’t normal, was it?

But it felt so good.

Kamukura tangled his long fingers into my hair and pulled me into a bruising kiss.

“Ah” Komaeda stared lustfully at the two of us.

Once we broke away, I tightened my legs around his waist. A wide smile was on my face as I observed us. “Nagi Sandwich… I love Nagi sandwiches.”

He let out a shuddered breath. “Nagi… Sandwich…?

I hummed. “Y-Yes. Izuru-sama and Rin-chan with Nagito-kun in the middle makes a Nagi Sandwich!”

It seemed that that was enough to bring him over the edge because the next I knew, he was spilling deep into me, taking me with him to sweet release.

Izuru let out a low groan; resting his head on Komaeda’s back as he was milked dry.

We cuddled on the floor, too tired to care about anything except the feeling of our bodies entwined. 

It wasn’t long before we passed out and we were woken up by a distressed Naegi.

“Please, get up and get dressed,” he pleaded before muttering, “I’ll have to make sure Saionji-san doesn’t have any more of that concoction of hers… Where did she even get it…?”

“How embarrassing… To be found like this,” Komaeda laughed, not looking embarrassed at all while I had been trying to hide beneath him.

Hinata also looked as if he wanted to melt into the floor, but managed to use his long mane to cover all his vital parts.

At least Komaeda appeared to be in a better mood. I should remember that Nagi Sandwiches were a good solution. That thought made me giggle.

“Rin-chan…”

I turned to him and was started to be pulled into a chaste kiss that left me curling my toes. “N-Nagito-kun…”

“UI love you, Rin-chan. Even if it’s selfish of me to want your affection, I crave it.”

“I love you, too, Nagito-kun,” I happily replied.

He, then, turned to Hinata.

“Kamukura-sama… Hinata-kun… I love you as well. Both as your individual selves and as Hajiru.” He smiled when his lover scowled at the name.

“Yeah… Yeah… ‘Love you, too,” Hinata grumbled, flushing a dark red.

Once everyone recovered from Saionji’s stunt, Hinata disappeared after a quick word to me saying that he was going to get rid of Enoshima’s arm, but to keep it a secret from Komaeda. He was going to have it replaced by a robotic prosthetic, but wasn’t sure if he would succeed, so he didn’t want to give our snow-haired lover too much hope, yet. With Kamukura on the job, however, I was confident it was all going to work out fine.

The only problem I saw while changing the bandages was that the stump had healed and merged with the foreign limb, which meant that the amputation would be more complicated. 

It was best not to make him worry until necessary.

“This way, Rin-chan!” Komaeda tugged me around the fifth island where I never had the opportunity to visit. 

We arrived at the street of vendors, just shops lined on both sides.

“Wow…” I gazed at the place in awe and just like that, I was the one to race ahead.

There was so much to see!

“Look, Nagi-kun!” I pointed excitedly to the window display where a large, white puppy plush sat with its small pink tongue sticking out. “C-Can I…? Can I?!”

He grinned. “I don’t see why not! As far as I know, everyone here is free and supplied by the Future Foundation.”

I skipped in and wrapped my arms around the ultra fluffy puppy plushy.

“Ah… You’re so tiny. It’s nearly as big as you!” he laughed.

I pouted, puffing out my cheeks before sticking my tongue out at him. It wasn’t my fault that he was so tall! I was just a little vertically challenged and I had over two decades to make peace with my height now. Besides, my new fluffy would never judge me.

“Do you need me to bring it back to our cottage?”

_Our cottage_.

The three of us lived there together. It was so domestic, but I was delighted and so was Komaeda.

Hinata was still too embarrassed to be too open regarding our relationship despite everyone else already figuring it out after one too many stolen kisses in public.

Saionji was the one to find them in an embrace and needless to say, the news travelled fast and within the hour, the secret was no more.

It was for the best. We didn’t need to be discrete anymore and hearing Hinata constantly protest when we grabbed him was hilarious.

And Kamukura… He came out whenever he felt like it, usually when a Talent was needed or if he was wanted for… other activities.

Now, we were going to have a new addition to the family – Lucky! Surely with all three of them, my own bad luck would be null and void, so all that would be left was good luck!

After cuddling him for five minutes, I had to sadly surrender him to Komaeda. My arms weren’t quite long enough to comfortably carry it around and it didn’t help that I kept tripping over its fluffy white tail.

_So fluffy…_

“Should I place him here?” Komaeda asked, beginning to set him on the carpet beside the couch, but I quickly stopped him.

“No, on the bed!” I exclaimed, jumping on the mattress and excitedly patted the centre.

He sighed, shaking his head, but complied by placing Lucky right in the middle. “Here?”

“Perfect!” I slung one arm around him and the other around our new puppy. This was perfect – absolutely perfect.

I had him curled around the puppy with me, until Kamukura came home and stood staring at us for a moment before walking over. 

“Izuru-sa – “

Lucky was torn from my arms and flung carelessly behind him.

My eyes widened in horror. “Lucky!” I tried to grab for it, but Kamukura swiftly tossed me back on the bed with his hands around my wrists and his knee between my legs.

“No,” he stated, while I stared at him with round eyes. “I will not be sharing you with anything else.”

Huh?

Of all things, Kamukura was feeling threatened over a stuffed puppy?

I giggled. “Izuru-sama is funny!”

He didn’t see the humour in it, so I decided to show him just how much I loved him. For such a cold, stoic individual, he was really needy. 

“Nagito-kun, aren’t you going to join us?” I asked, tilting my head to look at him. He had settled on to the armchair with his hand gripping the base of his cock. 

“Ha… Not this time. I want to watch. Kamukura-sama and Rin-chan look so good together.” A trail of drool ran down his chin as he gazed at us with half-hooded eyes. 

“Boring…” Kamukura muttered before latching on to my neck.

I squeaked, squirming beneath his body as he used my body however he wished. He really knew exactly what drove me crazy.

After our lovemaking, Komaeda retrieved a damp towel from the bathroom and began to carefully clean us up, taking his time with certain parts of our bodies. 

“Mm…” He ran it over my nipples several times before moving lower. “Nagito-kun…”

“I love you, Rin-chan.” He leaned down for a kiss.

After we were both cleaned, he wiped himself off and washed the cloth before climbing into bed with us. He liked the cuddle as much as I did and that was a lot. Sometimes, I wished that we could just stay in bed like this all day every day. The feel of their bodies were associated with safety. They drove away all the nightmares because I knew that they would never let anything happen to me. I was sure that it was the same for Komaeda.

I reached over to pull Kamukura’s hair over my body. “Good night,” I mumbled, nuzzling his chest.

“Good night,” Komaeda whispered against my back.

…

“Come in, Rin-chan. I won’t let anything happen to you.” He extended his hand towards me, but I shook my head. 

“Just get in already! This is painful to watch!” Saionji shouted.

Koizumi quietly chastised her behaviour, which settled the blonde who turned all her attention towards the photographer.

“We’re both here, Rin. You don’t have to worry,” Hinata urged from beside Komaeda.

“No, this was a bad idea,” I mumbled, about to turn away when I slipped on the wet tiles and went flying backwards. I let out a scream and closed my eyes.

“Rin-chan!”

“Rin!”

Two pairs of arms managed to catch me. With how tall they were compared to the shallow end, I didn’t even touch the pool. 

“Stay here with us. We’ll protect you. You’re too clumsy to be left alone,” Komaeda teased, kissing my forehead.

I huffed, but didn’t argue when they gently set me down into the water. It was cold.

“We’ll stay somewhere where your feet can touch the bottom,” Hinata told me, keeping a hand on my arm, while Komaeda had his on my waist. 

Eventually, they had me float on my back with their hands right beneath me.

I hated it.

The water kept getting on to my face and I kept trying to spit it out. I hoped that no one peed in it, but that was probably wishful thinking. I vaguely remembered Nidai shouting very loudly of his indecent deed just a couple of days ago. Did anyone ever clean the pool?

“I don’t wanna do this,” I mumbled, while trying to my best to keep water out of my mouth. I really wasn’t having any fun, but Komaeda was so determined.

I really couldn’t understand how he was able to swim with only one fully functional arm, while the other half flopped in the water.

He leaned down to kiss me, but the interaction made me move just a little too much and I was suddenly under water, drowning.

Only a second went by while I was panicking, but it felt like an eternity.

“I’m sorry, Rin-chan!” Komaeda had a stricken expression on his face as he frantically checked to make sure that I was alright. “You just looked so cute, I couldn’t help it…”

I shook my head. “It’s okay. I just need to not panic.” My feet were on the floor again. The water only went to my chest. If I could just keep calm, it would’ve been fine. “Let’s try again.”

At my words, he smiled and helped me back on my back.

It was going to be a long day, but at least I was spending it with my two favourite boys.

Another half hour went by where they taught me everything I needed to know, but I was still too scared to try on my own. No matter how Hinata tried to tug me deeper, I clung on tight to the edge, refusing to let go.

“Rin…”

I stiffened at the tone of voice. “Izu – “

I was suddenly scooped up and flying through the air. I could distantly hear Komaeda panicking, but water surrounded me, blocking out all the sound. My limbs were immediately flailing about, trying to get to the top, but after failing several times, I thought I was going to die.

_No, no…_

_Stay calm…_

_Stay calm…_

_**I’m going to die…**_

**** _It’s okay…_

_Kick your feet. Go up._

_It’s fine…_

_It’s fine…_

Sound returned to me when my head popped back up and somehow, I wasn’t drowning anymore. Komaeda was cheering from beside me with bloodshot eyes that looked as if he was crying and Kamukura was just standing at the edge of the pool with a bored look on his face.

“That was mean, Izuru-sama,” I huffed, my arms and legs were already tired, so I half swam and half flopped to Komaeda, clinging on to him like a koala.

He happily cut through the water to the edge where the ladder was and I managed to hull myself up.

“Okay. I’m done now. I can swim. Can we never do it again, please?”

Despite saying this, we went to the pool three times a week. Each time was easier than the last and seeing Komaeda happy really made it all worthwhile, especially since I had an excuse to cling on to him in the water.

Kamukura didn’t appear often in the pool area, so I was able to convince Hinata that I really didn’t want to go near the deep end. I was content with having water up to my chest and splash around like a little kid.

I really hated Kamukura’s method of teaching. It was harsh and straight to the point, but effective, so it all worked out in the end. 


	21. Chapter 21

**CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE**

“I believe in you.” He smiled at Hinata who was practically shaking from nerves. Even though Kamukura was going to be the one to do the operation, he felt as if he was about to pass out.

Komaeda was lying on the operating table. His body was bare and only four people were in the room – Hinata, Komaeda, Tsumiki, and me. I had no purpose here other than to be moral support.

“Okay… Tsumiki, please prepare the anaesthetics,” Hinata instructed before allowing Kamukura to gain control of the body.

I stroked Komaeda’s pale face with my gloved hand. “I’ll see you in a bit, okay?”

He hummed, the calm, trusting smile still on his face. “Kiss…?”

I leaned down to press my lips again his, the stiff surgical mask dampening the sensation. “I love you.”

“’Love you, too.”

Tsumiki placed the mask on him and told him to count down from ten. By the time he got to six, his eyes were already closed and he was out.

The process was gory. Kamukura worked with precise movements, but even then, there was so much blood. His thin, pale skin split easily, but there were dangling bits of sinew that had also grown towards the stolen arm.

Everything was going well, until something drew all our attention. We were only half an hour in, but Komaeda’s eyes began to move rapidly underneath his eyelids.

“B-But… h-he shouldn’t b-b-be waking up s-so quickly!” Tsumiki exclaimed with wide eyes.

“Give him a second dose,” Kamukura ordered without gazing up. He had to work faster. There was a high possibility that even the second dose wasn’t going to last long, especially since Komaeda tended to have bouts of terrible luck every once in a while. It was also possible that he had high tolerance because of his previous conditions. He had been in and out of the hospital very often.

I stroked his head as he fell still, once more.

I hoped that he was going to remain unconscious until Kamukura was at least done with the amputation.

Fortunately, Komaeda lasted until then, but not much after. He jerked and gasped in pain as his wound was being trimmed.

“I-I-I c-can’t give h-him a-a-anymore!” Tsumiki cried, her eyes watering in fear. “H-He’ll over d-d-dose!”

I looked to Kamukura who continued to work silently with one hand clamped down tightly to keep the arm still.

I sniffed, feeling for the straps on the sides of the bed and retrained Komaeda’s convulsing form down. “I-I’m sorry. It’s going to be okay, Nagito-kun. With you and Kamukura’s luck…” Maybe _I_ was the problem. Perhaps if I left, they would be more successful.

“Distract him, Rin,” Kamukura told me. His red orbs were suddenly locked on mine as if he had read my mind.

I swallowed hard and redirected all my attention to Komaeda. “Look at me, Nagito-kun.”

His pained eyes met mine. They were glazed and his mouth only opened for short gasps.

“I love you. I love you.” I took the risk of pulling down my mask to press my lips firmly against his, swallowing the cries of agony. I nibbled and licked, until he began to respond. “You like pain, don’t you?” I whispered, slowly squeezing his neck.

I was never the one inflicting the punishment. That was Kamukura’s job, but I had watched them play enough times to know what to do… Hopefully…

If I did it right, I could confuse him enough to mix pain and pleasure.

With my other hand, I tugged roughly at his hair, until he was panting. “H-Ha… R-Rin-chan…”

“Are you a good boy, Komaeda-kun?” I purred, trailing a hand down to pinch his exposed nipples.

“Y-Yes!” he moaned. “P-Please, Rin-chan!”

I kept my eyes o him, slowly licking downward and stopped at his navel, careful to avoid the operating spot.

His eyes never left mine as I kept him teetering on the edge of the next hour. His breathy pleads filled the air, causing Tsumiki to flush at the indecent display.

“Please… Please…” He was still struggling against the restraints, but perhaps for entirely different reasons.

“Almost…” I mumbled.

From the corner of my eyes, I could see that the mechanical arm was attached and Kamukura was just looking it over to make sure he hadn’t missed anything.

“It’s done, Tsumiki. Leave,” Kamukura ordered.

The nurse quickly fled, no doubt relieved to leave the perverted scene.

He leaned over, hovering above Komaeda with his hand down the other’s soaked pants. “You’ve been very good.” His low, velvety voice made me shudder.

Izuru-sama was so good at it…

“Cum. Cum for me.”

Komaeda gasped, eyes rolling back. His body arched as he came. His cries filled the room. Once he was back from his high, he had a dazed smile on his face. “So g-good… Th-thank you…” His eyes drifted shut and he was passed out once more.

With a sigh of relief, I finally allowed the tears to fall. T hat had scared me more than I was willing to admit. It was as if I was watching him die again, but worse because he was suffering so much. How much longer would he be in pain for?

Hinata pulled me into a hug. “Hey, he’ll be fine. He’s Komaeda, remember? Only Komaeda can take down Komaeda.”

That was most likely true, but he did like to bring himself down often and he _had_ orchestrated his own death in the Neo World Program. I refused to allow something like that to happen again.

Hinata wheeled Komaeda to a room and we stayed with him, taking turns going to the washroom and getting food. There were a few visitors: Tsumiki who was red in the face when she walked in, Kuzuryu who barely said anything, and Sonia who stayed with us for a while to keep us company.

When we were alone again, I cuddled up to Hinata in the armchair, my head resting on his chest. ‘This kind of feels like the time Komaeda had the Despair Disease,” I mumbled.

He chuckled. “It does, doesn’t it?”

I hummed, closing my eyes as I listened to the rhythm of his heart beat. “Hinata-kun?”

“Yeah?”

“When did you start having feelings for us? Was it one of us first or both together?”

He seemed surprised by the question and took a moment to reply. “Uh… I… I don’t really know exactly _when_. I mean… Komaeda was the first one I saw when I woke up on the island.”

Komaeda was the first face I saw too. Funny how that turned out. 

“He was the one I trusted most, until the first trial and then the two of you grew closer. A part of me felt a little left out as if I was abandoned, but that wasn’t really true. I had let him go after everyone thought he was crazy. I just… I just wanted to _belong_. That’s always when I seem to be chasing.” He let out a sad chuckle.

“Maybe it was when I saw you in the swim suit.” He blushed. “But I was pretty sure I was attracted to the both of you when you also fell victim to the Despair Disease and… and…” His face darkened further. “I walked in on you and Komaeda w-while you were… Komaeda didn’t seem to mind me in the room and y-you called to me. It took everything in my power not to give in. I couldn’t take advantage of you like that, but… I still felt dirty watching.

“You guys always seemed to be in the world of your own – unreachable. Still, you included me in activities and… and I guess I knew for sure then that I wanted to be in your lives,” he whispered. “Even if it’s unconventional and even if the others judged me for it. Their opinions didn’t seem to matter so much anymore because being with you guys made me happy.”

I quietly laughed. “I’m glad. I’m glad you gave us a chance. You make us very happy, too.”

“Sometimes, I wonder if it’s only because of Kamukura Izuru…” he began to doubt himself.

“Don't' be like Nagito-kun, Hinata-kun!” I exclaimed, giving his cheek a couple of soft pats. “I thought you would’ve realised that by now after what we did in the… Void…” 

The Void apparently was a glitch in the system where things just… disappeared. It had taken Komaeda and Hinata a while to find me whereas Kamukura just happened to materialise there after being separated from his host. He really was lucky…

I was glad I was no longer there and that my last memory of it was absolutely heavenly.

“R-Rin!”

I grinned cheekily at him, relaxing back in his arms. “I love you, Hinata-kun.”

“I love you, too, Rin, but can you start calling me Hajime, now?”

“Okay, Hinata-kun.”

For the next few days, Komaeda weaved in and out of consciousness. He was typically heavily dosed with opiods to keep him comfortable.

“You guys should get some sleep. We can look after him,” Kuzuryu said, crossing his arms after noticing the dark circles beneath our eyes.

Sonia nodded. “Please, friends. You are working yourselves to the ground. Komaeda-san would not wish to see you like this.”

Despite their concerns, we couldn’t leave him alone when he was so frail. He needed our support.

Shaking his head, Kuzuryu recruited Owari and Nidai to move several cots into the room. “There. If anything happens, you’ll know, so stop looking like you’re about to keep over!”

It was strange. To think that this was the same yakuza who refused to join in on any group activities… I was glad to see him like this. He was very kind.

Once they were gone, Hinata and I made use of the bed. We pushed the two cots together and slept beside Komaeda.

_*Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep…*_

_*Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*_

My eyes snapped open at the sound.

The heart monitor!

That sound could only mean that –

“Ha… Ha… Rin-chan is mean…”

I felt arms and legs circle around me like a koala. It wasn’t Hinata who was still slumbering in front of me.

“N-Nagito-kun?” I whispered, slowly turning in his arms. His bandaged mechanical one was lying on top of my waist. His faded mint orbs were swirling and he had a loopy smile on his face.

“Rin-chan and Hinata-kun are having fun without me.” He began to squeeze me a little tighter. ‘So mean…” His tongue poked out to run down the side of my neck before stopping at my racing pulse.

“Ah!” I cried out, hand reaching up to pull him closer.

Hinata stirred and also cried out, but for an entirely different reason. “Komaeda! You shouldn’t be out of bed - !”

“I _am_ in bed,” he purred back, looking at Hinata through a curtain of long, pale lashes.

“You know that’s not what I meant! And did you pull out your IV? You need fluids and – “ Hinata gasped when Komaeda reached over with his human hand to palm him. “Ngh! N-No… I – I can’t condone this behaviour!”

“But Hinata-kuuuun!” he whined.

Hinata shook his head and managed to get out of bed to tuck Komaeda back in. ‘Stay. We’ll come to you.”

We pushed the beds to his and re-inserted his IV back in. That seemed to pacify him enough to stay beneath the covers.

“Stop being bad, Nagi-kun,” I mumbled with my head resting by his neck.

“Will you punish me, Rin-sama?” he groaned, stroking my hair.

I shook my head. “No!”

“But I loved seeing you command me,” he purred, nuzzling the top of my head. “Rin-sama…”

“No, I wanna be your Rin-chan,” I protested. I was more suited to be the submissive. I liked obeying their commands.

“Ah… Might as well… Rin-chan is too little to punish me,” he giggled, slowly crawling on top of me.

His heart monitor was going crazy again, so Hinata entered mother hen mode.

“Settle down, Komaeda!” he snapped, scowling at the handsy man.

Komaeda slinked back on to the mattress with a pout on his face, but he didn’t try anything else for the next few hours.

It was another three days of constant monitoring before he was cleared to go outside and start on oral medication.

“You don’t have to stay here with me. There’s so many more important things you could do” he mumbled, playing with my hand with his human one because he was afraid he would crush it with the mechanical limb.

Hinata scoffed. “Unless you don’t want us here, we’re staying.”

I laid my head in Komaeda’s lap. “Not moving anymore,” I agreed.

After a week, we had Komaeda back in our cottage where a thin layer of dust settled on every surface.

I changed the sheets and because to wipe everything down, while Hinata took care of Komaeda.

Lucky needed a good dusting too, but once he smelt rosy clean again, I moved him closer to the bed, but not on it because I didn’t want Kamukura tossing my poor puppy around.

“Welcome home, Nagito-kun!” I shouted, seven hours too late, but it was only now that we had truly gotten comfortable in the newly cleaned house with food on our tables.

Komaeda smiled. “It’s good to be back.” He flexed his mechanical hand a few times. He was slowly getting use to it. “Thank you for making this for me. You didn’t have to.”

Hinata flushed. “It was Kamukura and Souda who did all the work, even with the operation. Kamukura and Tsumiki had – “

“Hinata-kun…”

“Right... You’re welcome.” Hinata smiled, his face still a soft pink.

Suddenly, Komaeda pounced on Hinata who let out a startled yelp as he fell over on to the mattress. Komaeda attacked his neck first, going straight for the pulse.

I watched, feeling myself grow hot all over. I didn’t know whether to join in or not. This seemed like Komaeda thoroughly thanking Hinata for all the hard work and I had no part in it.

Komaeda turned to me, his eyes swirling and darkened with lust. “Rin-chan…” He extended his mechanical hand towards me and I slowly moved away from Lucky to touch the cold digits. ‘Take it off. I want to see all of Rin-chan.”

I wordlessly did as I was told, my eyes trained on my two lovers.

He tugged me forward to fall beside Hinata who immediately buried his face into my hair. ‘I – I don’t think…”

“Stop thinking,” Komaeda purred, sliding a cold, metal finger inside me.

I let out a gasp at the foreign sensation. It was much larger than his human finger and when he added another, I began to squirm. It didn’t hurt, but it was definitely different. Once I was adjusted, I wiggled about until he began to move, while finally thrusting into Hinata.

Hinata tilted my head for a kiss, swallowing my cries. He was so gentle – the completely opposite of Kamukura’s absolute dominance. I was so fortunate to be able to be with them.

“More…” I panted when Hinata broke away.

I wasn’t sure exactly who I was addressing, but Hinata claimed my lips once more as the digits inside me began to vibrate. My eyes widened in shock and my body started convulsing as release hit me by surprise.

Hinata groaned, stroking my face as I floated. He continued to hover over me with Komaeda pumping in and out of him at a steady pace.

“Ha…” I was already on the verge of anther orgasm as Komaeda increased the vibrations. “S-Stop… Nagi…” If he didn’t, I wasn’t going to be able to control myself.

Suddenly, they were gone and I was met with emptiness that somehow made it all the worse. Hands shifted me to lie completely underneath Hinata and I immediately knew what we were going to do.

As he entered me, I sighed contently. “Hinata sandwich… Hinawich…”

Hinata snorted, head resting beside mine. “W-What’s with you and s-sandwiches?” he gasped. “And… terrible names…?”

I giggled, wrapping my arms around him. “They make me happy.”

“Then, it’s R-Rin sandwich next t-time.” Hinata was close. His body shook against mine.

“Rin-chan… Rin-chanwich…” Komaeda snickered, moving faster, pushing Hinata harder into me.

“A-Ah!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just more sexy time.
> 
> I'm kind of sad that this is the end. Maybe I'll write some one-shots in the future.
> 
> Thank you all for reading this. I really hope you enjoyed it!
> 
> At the moment, I'm working on a Jumin Han (Mystic Messenger) story. It's almost done, but I still need to type everything, which is where the update delay comes in because it's so mind-numbingly boring. I'm hoping to get something up in February. Who knows?
> 
> I'm also working on a CYOA Harry Potter story, but I don't know how that's going to go. It'll be a big project that may take forever.


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